tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Nov 25, 2015 0:31:43 GMT -5
I do plan to leave an inheritance. I have received something from both grandmothers and a small amount from my mother, and I do feel a responsibility to pay it forward. At the very least my son should receive (assuming nothing disastrous happens) a paid-off house which Zillow shows now as over $1 million. I anticipate also leaving financial assets of at least a couple hundred thousand to help cover expenses, maintenance, and updates.
For now, though, I funded his Roth for last year, and will probably match whatever he contributes this year. I'll probably suggest that it is a loan, and then never ask for repayment.
I should actually give it to him for a few more years, both to pay forward what I received and also to make him equal with what his half-sister stole from me....
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Apple
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Post by Apple on Nov 25, 2015 2:53:11 GMT -5
I don't plan to, however, depending on when I die he could get a lot anyway.
I've saved well for retirement, I'll have a pension, and should have a paid off house/property (maybe two). I don't want to run out of money, but I want to have my own fun too. If I die old like my grandparents, he's likely to be in his 80s anyway!
ETA: I'd leave whatever is left to him/any future grandkids though. There are a few charities I donate to, but I do that now. I don't plan to leave stuff to anyone else after I'm gone.
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ohmomto2boys
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Post by ohmomto2boys on Nov 25, 2015 7:15:28 GMT -5
Right now, if everything remains constant, our kids will get an inheritance. But, that can quickly change so it is not a definite goal of ours. If there is money left when we die, great, they will get it. Me and DH will not be getting any inheritance and that is okay. I most certainly don't expect it.
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yogiii
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Post by yogiii on Nov 25, 2015 7:19:20 GMT -5
DH and I certainly won't be receiving anything. I'd like to help the kids with college, house dp and stuff like that. If I croak early they'll probably each get something but I'm not intending to leave any sort of legacy. I'm way too lazy to do that!
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milee
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Post by milee on Nov 25, 2015 7:56:36 GMT -5
I once made a comment to him about getting pre need burial plan and he said "no need for that spend your money while you are alive" I'll roll you down the hill into the woods, cover your with leaves when the time comes!! You have trained him well.
I keep trying to explain to my kids how much I do not want them to spend a lot of money on death arrangements for me. When we were in Phoenix, I told them I'd like to be a mummy so they could just leave me in the desert and let nature take its course. Nothing ever dries out here in Florida though so I told them I'd like a Viking funeral (put me on my boat, push it out into the ocean and set light to it by shooting flaming arrows at it), but then realized I didn't want any of my boats destroyed. So had to clarify that they couldn't use any of my boats for this and instead needed to build me a raft out of recycled popsicle sticks. Now, whenever I'm sick they get a little gleam in their eye and ask if they need to start building a raft. I'm not sure they're really taking this need for an inexpensive funeral/body disposal thing seriously.
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Shooby
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Post by Shooby on Nov 25, 2015 8:14:46 GMT -5
I once made a comment to him about getting pre need burial plan and he said "no need for that spend your money while you are alive" I'll roll you down the hill into the woods, cover your with leaves when the time comes!! You have trained him well.
I keep trying to explain to my kids how much I do not want them to spend a lot of money on death arrangements for me. When we were in Phoenix, I told them I'd like to be a mummy so they could just leave me in the desert and let nature take its course. Nothing ever dries out here in Florida though so I told them I'd like a Viking funeral (put me on my boat, push it out into the ocean and set light to it by shooting flaming arrows at it), but then realized I didn't want any of my boats destroyed. So had to clarify that they couldn't use any of my boats for this and instead needed to build me a raft out of recycled popsicle sticks. Now, whenever I'm sick they get a little gleam in their eye and ask if they need to start building a raft. I'm not sure they're really taking this need for an inexpensive funeral/body disposal thing seriously.
So go prepay your own funeral and then that is taken care of.
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teen persuasion
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Post by teen persuasion on Nov 25, 2015 9:14:56 GMT -5
I once made a comment to him about getting pre need burial plan and he said "no need for that spend your money while you are alive" I'll roll you down the hill into the woods, cover your with leaves when the time comes!! You have trained him well.
I keep trying to explain to my kids how much I do not want them to spend a lot of money on death arrangements for me. When we were in Phoenix, I told them I'd like to be a mummy so they could just leave me in the desert and let nature take its course. Nothing ever dries out here in Florida though so I told them I'd like a Viking funeral (put me on my boat, push it out into the ocean and set light to it by shooting flaming arrows at it), but then realized I didn't want any of my boats destroyed. So had to clarify that they couldn't use any of my boats for this and instead needed to build me a raft out of recycled popsicle sticks. Now, whenever I'm sick they get a little gleam in their eye and ask if they need to start building a raft. I'm not sure they're really taking this need for an inexpensive funeral/body disposal thing seriously.
LOL! Popsicle sticks would take too long - there is a local college that has a course to make a Q & D canoe out of plywood. I'll bet you could find one of those canoes around and pick it up for a song - my dad stored my DB's in his garage for ages before he finally got DB to take it to his garage, for storage. Doubt it's been used more than twice. I keep telling my gang to donate my body to science. Seriously. Back on topic - I'm trying to get our finances to the point where we won't run out of money, so in theory there will be some left to go to the kids, but I am not specifically planning to that end. Given that DH and I are nearly 50 and 3 of our 4 parents are still going strong, an inheritance won't likely come early enough to "set them up for life". I'm considering trying to do things for our future grandchildren while we are still around, to help them get a leg up. Of course, we are still in the saving mode right now, and still have a few more to get thru college, so it is pretty nebulous at this point. I have very few details on my parents' finances, so I am not anticipating receiving anything more than a nominal inheritance. They are comfortable financially, but I have no idea how much of their income dies with them (SS, annuities, etc.) and how much is investments. As long as they are happy, everything is good. Longevity runs in the family, too. Both have older siblings over 90 right now, and a great aunt lived to 102. So, not holding my breath waiting for an inheritance at all.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Nov 25, 2015 9:16:56 GMT -5
After paying an obscene amount for DH's funeral, I've told my children I will haunt them if they do such a wasteful thing. Crispy critter me and scatter my ashes somewhere.
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milee
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Post by milee on Nov 25, 2015 9:18:12 GMT -5
You have trained him well.
I keep trying to explain to my kids how much I do not want them to spend a lot of money on death arrangements for me. When we were in Phoenix, I told them I'd like to be a mummy so they could just leave me in the desert and let nature take its course. Nothing ever dries out here in Florida though so I told them I'd like a Viking funeral (put me on my boat, push it out into the ocean and set light to it by shooting flaming arrows at it), but then realized I didn't want any of my boats destroyed. So had to clarify that they couldn't use any of my boats for this and instead needed to build me a raft out of recycled popsicle sticks. Now, whenever I'm sick they get a little gleam in their eye and ask if they need to start building a raft. I'm not sure they're really taking this need for an inexpensive funeral/body disposal thing seriously.
So go prepay your own funeral and then that is taken care of. [ Hell, no! I don't want anyone's money wasted on that. Dispose of my body as economically as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them.
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ArchietheDragon
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Post by ArchietheDragon on Nov 25, 2015 9:18:51 GMT -5
So go prepay your own funeral and then that is taken care of. [ Hell, no! I don't want anyone's money wasted on that. Dispose of my body as economical as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them. Funerals are not for the dead. They are for the living.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Nov 25, 2015 9:20:35 GMT -5
[ Hell, no! I don't want anyone's money wasted on that. Dispose of my body as economical as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them. Funerals are not for the dead. They are for the living. Ask any funeral home and they will tell you that
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olderburgher
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Post by olderburgher on Nov 25, 2015 9:20:57 GMT -5
Why wouldn't I/we? We both inherited from our parents so why not pass it on. Our kids are independent and doing okay mostly just like we were at their ages. They'd survive and prosper without it but why not put them in a position where they may be able to help their kids or their grandkids? How much will it be? Who knows? Why would it matter?
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milee
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Post by milee on Nov 25, 2015 9:21:20 GMT -5
[ Hell, no! I don't want anyone's money wasted on that. Dispose of my body as economical as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them. Funerals are not for the dead. They are for the living. Hopefully I'm raising my living to not want such a thing. Plus, I've been "the living" and can't remember one time I'd have preferred a funeral over a party.
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Nov 25, 2015 9:52:26 GMT -5
I hope not to run out of money but don't need to leave any. I don't think it helps that much to give to the next generation. Mom lost her mom when mom was 80 so the money went to the bank, we were 64-65-66 when mom died. Two were retired already and none of us needed the money. If you need money past 60 inheriting will be a waste and if you don't need it a waste. So I am helping the younger generation with college and things now and trying to guide them towards financial independence. Ten thousand at 20 or twenty thousand at 30 is worth more than 100 thousand at 80 and you can see who uses it the way you want.
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Sam_2.0
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Post by Sam_2.0 on Nov 25, 2015 9:58:35 GMT -5
DH has clients that buy millions and millions in whole life policies just to pass on an inheritance to their kids/grandkids (outside of taxes). So not YM/Dave Ramsey, but it's what they do. Seems to be one particular people group here too. After listening to YM for so long, I find the concept and reasoning interesting.
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Baby Fawkes
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Post by Baby Fawkes on Nov 25, 2015 9:59:53 GMT -5
Not planning to, but then again I'm not planning to try and run my finances to zero just in time to pass away. I don't want to live longer than planned without resources so there will technically be something. 3 I've always told my parents that I don't expect anything. I hope there is something for the reason above. By something I mean that I hope they don't run out of resources but can enjoy all their hard earned gains for themselves.
I don't have any concerns about my parents. They didn't inherit anything financially either. I definitely don't expect anything but paperwork nightmares from my in laws. They have declared bankruptcy twice and are terrible with money. DW was supposed to inherit about $10K from her aunt last year. It was written in he will but her uncle as executor told us that he was going to give the money to her parents instead because "we are doing well for ourselves and he can't understand how we let her parents house almost get foreclosed on" . What he didn't know is that the four of us (DW, myself SIL and her husband) we all planning on putting that $20k total aside to help cover the parents when they finally hit rock bottom by putting it towards a house we would buy in our names for them. He didn't stop to think that we've bailed them out before and they just went and refinanced it all out to put them back in this situation.
Anyway, they've done it again. They got caught up on their mortgage with the $20K but are behind again because they can't stay away from the casino. We always had a plan to help them with the money but he took it on himself to do that. We could take action but at the end of the day the money is gone and I don't want to risk ruining my in law relationship of a relatively small sum of money.
So I waffle a bunch there, but my thoughts are in line with others who have said they'd rather help with college. I'd much prefer to spend the inheritance on them while In around to see them use/enjoy it.
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Post by mojothehelpermonkey on Nov 25, 2015 10:44:24 GMT -5
I don't have kids, so I am hoping I can hit that sweet spot where I have just enough money to live comfortably until I die. If I do have anything left for the next generation, I will probably pass it on to some of my cousins' kids.
My mom ended up caring for her parents when her dad had a stroke and couldn't work anymore and had to pay for both funerals. My dad's parents owned a lot of farmland. They had a comfortable retirement and left each of their children a portion of the farm. My aunts and uncles have all sold their farmland to fund their retirements. My brother and I weren't expecting to inherit anything from my dad, but we did end up with my dad's chunk of farmland when he died before he got a chance to retire. Who knows what will happen with my mom. She was planning to get by on social security, but now she is engaged to a guy with generational wealth. She will almost certainly outlive him, but I am sure my mom will not mind signing a pre-nup to make sure that all of his money stays in his family and doesn't end up going to my brother and me. It would be insane if we ended up with some other family's wealth just because my mom got remarried in her 60s. At the same time, I hope that my mom will be provided for if she does outlive him.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 25, 2015 10:53:53 GMT -5
Dispose of my body as economically as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them. DH had his mother cremated after she died and they offered to sell him a wood coffin that would, of course, be burned up along with her body. He chose a cardboard version instead. I never met her but from what he tells me, that's what she would have wanted. My own parents paid for college for all 5 of us. From what I know of their finances (they're in their mid-80s), they'll be OK but there probably won't be much left after they're both gone and it's split 5 ways. I did, however, indirectly benefit from a generous legacy over 30 years ago. My first husband's mother died and we used $100K of the inheritance to put a down payment on a house. We divorced 13 years later and I got 40% of the equity, which was also about $100K. My Ex stayed chronically unemployed and squandered his share but I took my $100K and added a $250K mortgage (in NNJ that bought me a modest Cape Cod in a good school district). I sold it 7 years later and netted $200K. Second DH and I didn't need it when we moved to a LCOL area so we invested it. That was 2003. It's done very well. I like to think my Ex's parents would appreciate how I used the money they left behind. Anyway- odds are DH will go first (he's 77) and I'll live to a ripe old age. Under some reasonable assumptions I'll still be worth a few million in 30 years so DS could inherit. His knee-jerk reaction when we discussed it was, "I don't want any of your money", but when I pointed out that it could benefit his children he was more receptive. We got him through college with no loans and I've already started a 529 for our granddaughter. They want at least one more child, maybe two. My biggest priority will be to make sure I have enough to live on but my next priority after that is to help the grandkid(s) through college. If I die with zero, I'll have done it right and DS won't be disappointed.
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Post by Deleted on Nov 25, 2015 10:55:08 GMT -5
I hope not to run out of money but don't need to leave any. I don't think it helps that much to give to the next generation. Mom lost her mom when mom was 80 so the money went to the bank, we were 64-65-66 when mom died. Two were retired already and none of us needed the money. If you need money past 60 inheriting will be a waste and if you don't need it a waste. So I am helping the younger generation with college and things now and trying to guide them towards financial independence. Ten thousand at 20 or twenty thousand at 30 is worth more than 100 thousand at 80 and you can see who uses it the way you want. If my parents leave me money in my early 60's it will make my retirement much more comfortable. It would be very good timing actually to get a nice lump sum as my earning potential dies down.
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sesfw
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Post by sesfw on Nov 25, 2015 11:23:07 GMT -5
.... but I am sure my mom will not mind signing a pre-nup to make sure that all of his money stays in his family and doesn't end up going to my brother and me. ...... At the same time, I hope that my mom will be provided for if she does outlive him.
Helpermonkey ..... I hope your mom insists on a pre-nup. Things will be a lot easier between her and her 'new family'. It's one of the things I insisted on when DH#2 and I married.
Back to the question ........... yes, I'm hoping to leave a small inheritance. That will mean I didn't outlive my resources. A big one ........ no.
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Bonny
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Post by Bonny on Nov 25, 2015 11:45:27 GMT -5
Do the cat's count? Seriously about the only sort of legacy I'm planning on leaving is to the pets that I may or may not have at the time of my demise. I've actually been pretty lazy about the estate planning (just MrSroo and I, no dependents). But I anticipate when I do get around to it, there will be a trust for the fuzzy ones. Yes!
We've set up a Pet Trust to set aside some money for any pets we may have and a stipend for the guardian.
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Bonny
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Post by Bonny on Nov 25, 2015 11:54:02 GMT -5
I definitely don't expect anything but paperwork nightmares from my in laws. They have declared bankruptcy twice and are terrible with money. DW was supposed to inherit about $10K from her aunt last year. It was written in he will but her uncle as executor told us that he was going to give the money to her parents instead because "we are doing well for ourselves and he can't understand how we let her parents house almost get foreclosed on" . What he didn't know is that the four of us (DW, myself SIL and her husband) we all planning on putting that $20k total aside to help cover the parents when they finally hit rock bottom by putting it towards a house we would buy in our names for them. He didn't stop to think that we've bailed them out before and they just went and refinanced it all out to put them back in this situation. Anyway, they've done it again. They got caught up on their mortgage with the $20K but are behind again because they can't stay away from the casino. We always had a plan to help them with the money but he took it on himself to do that. We could take action but at the end of the day the money is gone and I don't want to risk ruining my in law relationship of a relatively small sum of money. Yeah, it's hard to explain to outsiders what it's like dealing with this situation.
My parents weren't casino gamblers but they did use their home equity to over-extend themselves in real estate "investments" and their lifestyle.
My brother is the same way. He lost the family house which was purchased back in 1963. My parents had mortgaged it up and were getting divorced after 36 years of marriage. Because my brother's credit was so bad it took over a year for him to find someone to lend him money. I think his FICO was in the 400s. Anyway he kept mortgaging the house and finally lost it in 2009. Due to prop 13 the property taxes were $700/yr. It's really painful to be around so I limit the time I'm around my family.
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TheHaitian
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Post by TheHaitian on Nov 25, 2015 12:30:13 GMT -5
As with the college issue, my opinion on this has changed. I received zero parental assistance for college and will count myself lucky if I don't have to pay for my parents' funerals. Pre-kid, I figured I did it on my own and so could s/he. Now I'm coming up on a decade out of college, and cost increases are insane. I think of the things I could do and the freedoms I would have without the burden of six-figure student loans. And I think how nice it would be to be left with something other than grief and paperwork when a loved one dies. So I hope to be able to give DD more than I had. How much, I don't know. We are on the same boat!!!!
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resolution
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Post by resolution on Nov 25, 2015 12:46:44 GMT -5
We don't have kids, and our siblings are spenders that would run through our life savings in no time. We have things set up to split between some charities and our siblings.
I am not going out of my way to leave an inheritance behind, but for my own security and peace of mind I want to accumulate a big pile of money that keeps growing instead of depleting. If DH and I died right now our siblings would all get very nice surprises, but I hope we survive long enough for it to be an even nicer surprise.
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cronewitch
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Post by cronewitch on Nov 25, 2015 13:37:09 GMT -5
I hope not to run out of money but don't need to leave any. I don't think it helps that much to give to the next generation. Mom lost her mom when mom was 80 so the money went to the bank, we were 64-65-66 when mom died. Two were retired already and none of us needed the money. If you need money past 60 inheriting will be a waste and if you don't need it a waste. So I am helping the younger generation with college and things now and trying to guide them towards financial independence. Ten thousand at 20 or twenty thousand at 30 is worth more than 100 thousand at 80 and you can see who uses it the way you want. If my parents leave me money in my early 60's it will make my retirement much more comfortable. It would be very good timing actually to get a nice lump sum as my earning potential dies down. The money in the 60s was nice but not life changing, if you don't save for your sell you can't be saved. Look how many parents are bailed out and get right back in trouble. My parents gave me 13K when I was divorced at 35. That made a house down payment, they left me 170K when I was 65 it didn't really do anything I was already to retire with enough, holding it for 30 more years to leave to grandchildren and great grands of my parents seems excessive so I am helping them while young. A 19 year old getting educated with less debt will mean more to him than money when he is 50 so I will help him with college, house down payment and starting his first ROTH even if he gets less at 50.
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quince
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Post by quince on Nov 25, 2015 13:40:38 GMT -5
I'm hoping my parents aren't dead when I'm in my early 60's- My mom's parents are still going strong in their mid-80s, and my dad is 6 years younger than my mom.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Nov 25, 2015 13:51:38 GMT -5
Dispose of my body as economically as possible and then have a celebration of life/family party- that I would happily pay for. Hopefully by now my kids understand that if they buy me a fancy coffin or spend money on something as maudlin and self-centered as a "funeral" I will find a way to come back and haunt them. DH had his mother cremated after she died and they offered to sell him a wood coffin that would, of course, be burned up along with her body. He chose a cardboard version instead. I never met her but from what he tells me, that's what she would have wanted. My own parents paid for college for all 5 of us. From what I know of their finances (they're in their mid-80s), they'll be OK but there probably won't be much left after they're both gone and it's split 5 ways. I did, however, indirectly benefit from a generous legacy over 30 years ago. My first husband's mother died and we used $100K of the inheritance to put a down payment on a house. We divorced 13 years later and I got 40% of the equity, which was also about $100K. My Ex stayed chronically unemployed and squandered his share but I took my $100K and added a $250K mortgage (in NNJ that bought me a modest Cape Cod in a good school district). I sold it 7 years later and netted $200K. Second DH and I didn't need it when we moved to a LCOL area so we invested it. That was 2003. It's done very well. I like to think my Ex's parents would appreciate how I used the money they left behind. Anyway- odds are DH will go first (he's 77) and I'll live to a ripe old age. Under some reasonable assumptions I'll still be worth a few million in 30 years so DS could inherit. His knee-jerk reaction when we discussed it was, "I don't want any of your money", but when I pointed out that it could benefit his children he was more receptive. We got him through college with no loans and I've already started a 529 for our granddaughter. They want at least one more child, maybe two. My biggest priority will be to make sure I have enough to live on but my next priority after that is to help the grandkid(s) through college. If I die with zero, I'll have done it right and DS won't be disappointed. Why do you need to be cremated in a coffin? That seems like a waste of trees. Just put me on a funeral pyre and push me out into the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Nov 25, 2015 13:52:33 GMT -5
I'm way more concerned about retirement than leaving DS anything.
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Post by mojothehelpermonkey on Nov 25, 2015 13:53:06 GMT -5
.... but I am sure my mom will not mind signing a pre-nup to make sure that all of his money stays in his family and doesn't end up going to my brother and me. ...... At the same time, I hope that my mom will be provided for if she does outlive him.
Helpermonkey ..... I hope your mom insists on a pre-nup. Things will be a lot easier between her and her 'new family'. It's one of the things I insisted on when DH#2 and I married. Back to the question ........... yes, I'm hoping to leave a small inheritance. That will mean I didn't outlive my resources. A big one ........ no. I agree, and I plan to gently inquire the next time she visits. She was burned pretty badly by her ex, financially and emotionally, but so far this new guy seems like an upgrade in every way. I hope she will have a happy and peaceful retirement with her new husband, and my brother and I can split the heirloom furniture from our side of the family when she is gone.
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whoami
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Post by whoami on Nov 25, 2015 14:12:05 GMT -5
I dont get the whole "pass it on...pay it forward" concept. If everyone keeps passing it on, what is the point of getting an inheritance. Ego?
Id rather help my kids while Im still around rather than leave them with a bunch of money once Im dead.
My parents included their grandchildren in the will so I guess I dont have the obligation some apparently feel.
Quite frankly, I hope my parents last long enough to enjoy every penny they earned.
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