Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Mar 11, 2011 12:18:47 GMT -5
leelaughs, These are just some thoughts - 1) This may not be an option since I think you said you live in a rural area, but have you looked at the possibility of Sect 8 housing? It is there exactly for people in your situation. 2) The suggestion of getting a 1BR is a good one. If you could get a decent hideabed, you could sleep on that and give your DS the bedroom. As your finances ease up a bit, then you could move to a 2BR. 3) When you DO move, it might be worthwhile to post on freecycle and CL explaining your situation and listing what you need in the way of furniture. Also, let family and friends know that you need furnishings and accept whatever is offered (donate what you can't use)
Realistically, you cannot afford $750 rent and pay off your debts. Life happens and you will end up digging yourself into a deeper hole.
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qofcc
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Post by qofcc on Mar 11, 2011 13:17:01 GMT -5
1) This may not be an option since I think you said you live in a rural area, but have you looked at the possibility of Sect 8 housing? It is there exactly for people in your situation.
That's an excellent idea. Section 8 is a voucher program and can be used anywhere, it's very common in rural areas, but the waiting list can be very long. I've read that it's 1 year in my county and 5 years in a neighboring county.
You should get yourself on the list ASAP. If your name comes up and you don't need it anymore you can always say no thanks.
The type of housing gardening grandma is referring to is called income based housing projects. Your local HUD office should be able to provide you with a list or you can look on their website. They also tend to have long waiting lists, so you should fill out applications at all of the ones that are acceptable to you just in case.
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973beachbum
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Post by 973beachbum on Mar 11, 2011 13:33:03 GMT -5
My mother needs the $400 to keep paying her mortgage.. i not sure exactly what she is going to do when I move but she has chosen.. the boyfriend over us.. so I have to leave. I did file taxes - my savings is what is left after i paid some personal loans-- I looked at my student loans.. it does look like I qualify for IBR- and I also have an option of a 1 yr forbearance- (my only one left) which do you think is the better option.. the IBR or the forbearance? Lee IBR is much better if you can do it than a foreberance. If you find you really need to, you can always do the forebearance later. I would check on section 8 in your county. some places I have heard it is wonderful and some places like where I live they won't even take your name. They have a more than 3 year waiting list so it really isn't much help to people now. But I think you should check it out anyway. If you don't ask you are gaurenteed not to recieve.
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Clifford
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Post by Clifford on Mar 11, 2011 13:44:34 GMT -5
Moving out may also lead to childcare needs. Be prepared for this. Is there a YMCA in the area? They have individual and family plans (and often income-based reductions) that could provide a safe place in the afternoons.
They also often offer Karate, Kickboxing, and even Muay Thai.
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NomoreDramaQ1015
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Post by NomoreDramaQ1015 on Mar 11, 2011 13:50:52 GMT -5
If you need childcare start looking NOW. There are more parents/kids than facilities and wait lists can be very long, especially for places that offer income based reductions. I started looking for my DD before she was even born and some places had waiting lists as long as two years (that was Children's Square which does a lot of income reduction care). The daycare I got her into told me if you got a school age kid your best bet for finding an opening is during the summer (people move, kids grow old enough to stay home, etc), if you wait till the school year starts you are probably going to be SOL.
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patchwork150
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Post by patchwork150 on Mar 11, 2011 16:15:46 GMT -5
wow, OP you are really getting some good responses. I think everyone has a good point!
I would say, that the idea of trying to get things straighted out while living in a 1 BR apartment seems like a good solution. I agree that if you over-extend yourself, or make your budget too tight, you won't find success.
I wish you and your son the best!
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endofera
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Post by endofera on Mar 11, 2011 20:50:30 GMT -5
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suziq38
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Post by suziq38 on Mar 12, 2011 2:27:05 GMT -5
Karate is not essential. Ditto for $200.00 Grocery, $200.00 eating out and $60.00 school lunches. Have your child bring his/her lunch, or apply for "free lunches" since you are a single parent. Cut back on these and you can find about $400.00 a month. Do you have any family nearby? Go visit them on the weekends for free meals and good companionship.
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mamasita99
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Post by mamasita99 on Mar 12, 2011 6:52:44 GMT -5
Talk to your son's guidance counselor at school and explain the situation. They tend to know about local groups that help students with food, supplies, etc. Since you don't qualify for free lunch your son is probably overlooked. If the school is aware of your situation they can direct you to resources. Good luck! And try for free/reduced lunch again, especially after you move out. If you still don't qualify, just start packing. MUCH cheaper.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Mar 14, 2011 17:50:14 GMT -5
I don't think Section 8 is viable. Here there are long lists of people waiting. I rented Section 8 once, she was a tenant in a property I purchased.
I think it's worth the OP's consideration. Even if there is a long waiting list, if you never get on the list, you'll certainly never get in. There may or may not be anything in the OP's area, but in her situation I would look at every possibility.
We do rent to Sect 8 tenants. They are autistic adults. They have caregivers provided by a non profit organization. Part of the rent is automatically deposited by the county housing authority. The other part comes from the tenants whose caregivers sit down with them each month and help them write checks for their share. So far, it's working out for everyone concerned.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 15, 2011 11:14:21 GMT -5
Wow!!! This is bad. At least TRY to finish out the school year at your moms for stability for your son and to pay some cards off and to save what you can. Can you get a place for what you can afford? You may need to get a part-time job for awhile to get some extra cash to save up for your expenses.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Mar 15, 2011 12:27:26 GMT -5
She said in post #8 that she was trying to wait til June so as not to disrupt her son's school year....
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 15, 2011 14:12:07 GMT -5
She is trying but mom's boyfriend wants her out. I wonder if mom's boyfriend is going to fork over the 400 bucks like OP does?
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 15, 2011 14:15:54 GMT -5
I have only one section 8 tenant and she is a military wife but she isn't even a good tenant. Once the "handout" mentality starts, it never really ends. Now her husband is home and sitting around as well. She won't work because he won't work. Ridiculous. I'll be evicting her this summer because I have had enough of section 8 forever. OP needs to last this year regardless of the BF and get some oney saved and some bills paid off and she needs a part-time job. More money, less expenses is the key.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Mar 15, 2011 15:06:48 GMT -5
I'll play devils advocate: We've had very few issues with section 8 tenants. My parents are renting to at least 2 of them now. Maybe we've been lucky, but it seems like the tenants are usually so grateful to get into a nicer place that they pay their portion on time, and take care of the property so that they can stay there as long as possible.
OP--I'll second the suggestion of starting with a 1 bedroom. Or if you have a friend that could use $400 per month, try to rent with them. Any other single mom's out there maybe that you could also share childcare with? I wouldn't keep my child in a home that was a bad environment if I could help it.
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Peace77
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Post by Peace77 on Mar 16, 2011 10:20:16 GMT -5
Have you told your mother that you plan to move out?
If she is depending on your rent to pay her bills, some warning is in order.
Have you found any possible places to live?
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 16, 2011 10:38:17 GMT -5
You can only share a bedroom if the child is under 2 unless you get a lax landlord. A one bedroom really isn't an option unless it's in an area where the landlord will "look the other way." Her being on a couch won't cut it. She legally needs a 2 bedroom as a renter. Maybe in her mom's home she is sharing a bedroom with her child( I don't know) but you can get away with it there. I think if I had apartments I would do section 8 on old people but then, some of them have issues as well. But a single family residence isn't good for old people because of the yardwork to maintain it. So you get "families." Single moms who move their boyfriends in right away and then the fun starts with their fights and theirt kids running wild. No thanks.
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april47
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Post by april47 on Mar 16, 2011 13:39:53 GMT -5
Depends on where you live I guess. In my area its 2 per bedroom no matter what age.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Mar 17, 2011 10:06:02 GMT -5
You can only share a bedroom if the child is under 2 unless you get a lax landlord. A one bedroom really isn't an option unless it's in an area where the landlord will "look the other way." Her being on a couch won't cut it. She legally needs a 2 bedroom as a renter. Maybe in her mom's home she is sharing a bedroom with her child( I don't know) but you can get away with it there. I think if I had apartments I would do section 8 on old people but then, some of them have issues as well. But a single family residence isn't good for old people because of the yardwork to maintain it. So you get "families." Single moms who move their boyfriends in right away and then the fun starts with their fights and theirt kids running wild. No thanks. First of all, this does vary by area. Second, it's generally only an issue during custody fights. If an ex showed up wanting custody or if somehow DSHS got involved. In the OP's case, I see no problem with the OP sleeping on a hideabed in the living area so her DS can have a bedroom until she can afford a 2 BR.
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daisylu
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Post by daisylu on Mar 17, 2011 11:15:30 GMT -5
If the OP really needs to get out that soon, her debts are not the priority. She needs CASH to rent a place. First, last, & security deposit. Pay the minimum payment on the cards until you have secured a place to live, then develop a plan to got rid of it.
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phil5185
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Post by phil5185 on Mar 17, 2011 11:30:27 GMT -5
I rented Section 8 once, she was a tenant in a property I purchased. After I got her out, never never again. What a pain in the butt. Same here, never again. Each year the Inspector came out and demanded that I put new screens on the house - and each year the kids ripped the screens out within 6 months, geeez. When they left after 4 to 8 yrs (don't recall for sure) I had to do the normal 'wear' items - interior paint, carpet, flooring. Also had to replace broken toilets, all interior doors were broken, etc. Section 8 said that they would pay up to their limit (about $1100 I think). I put in my application - finally I put a note on my desk at work to call them every Monday at 8:00 for a year. At least 4 times they had a new director - each time I introduced myself and calmly told my story. And after about a year they finally sent a check - but it takes lots of patience.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 17, 2011 23:54:56 GMT -5
They don't even do that now. They actually tell you to "sue" the tenant. Well, duh, if they had a job or money to begin with, they wouldn't be on Section 8. Housing used to also come out and inspect and if the tenant had trashed the place, they lost Housing for 2 years. They don't do that anymore, either. Housing USED to have the landlord's back in dealing with that garbage but now they are totally on the tenant's side. Goodbye to Housing forever. I let my one military wife use it because she had been my tenant before her husband joined the military but now she "got the mentality" of society's moochers and sits on her behind all day long along with her husband.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 18, 2011 8:22:48 GMT -5
OP, I just don't see with your finances how you can move out at this time. Have you talked to your mother? Is she demanding that you (her daughter) and her grandson move out at this time for a boyfriend? Really? You need time to pay off debt and get money saved and a few months isn't going to cut it unless you get another job to pay off debt faster and build up savings more.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 18, 2011 8:23:30 GMT -5
OP, I just don't see with your finances how you can move out at this time. Have you talked to your mother? Is she demanding that you (her daughter) and her grandson move out at this time for a boyfriend? Really? You need time to pay off debt and get money saved and a few months isn't going to cut it unless you get another job to pay off debt faster and build up savings more.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 18, 2011 8:23:34 GMT -5
OP, I just don't see with your finances how you can move out at this time. Have you talked to your mother? Is she demanding that you (her daughter) and her grandson move out at this time for a boyfriend? Really? You need time to pay off debt and get money saved and a few months isn't going to cut it unless you get another job to pay off debt faster and build up savings more.
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The J
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Post by The J on Mar 18, 2011 10:35:58 GMT -5
I don't think the mother is demanding it. I think the OP doesn't want her son around the BF. She told the mother this, but the mother decided to let the BF move in anyway. It's the OP's choice to move out.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 18, 2011 13:10:37 GMT -5
Sad but then there is always two sides to this story. Perhaps boyfriend is making up the difference in what OP is paying. I'd LIKE to live somewhere for $400 a month!!!! I guess I'd keep son away from boyfriend until I got my financial house in order and I'd be doing that asap as in another job and cutting spending wherever I could. She needs to get more out of debt and get more into savings before she moves.
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Gardening Grandma
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Post by Gardening Grandma on Mar 18, 2011 13:23:54 GMT -5
We don't know anything about the OP's objections to the mother's bf. Maybe he's creepy or maybe the OP simply dislikes him. He may be an abusive alcaholic or simply have different political views. We simply don't know. Hence we really don't know just how urgently she needs to move.
And she hasn't returned with an update or more info.
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Post by leelaughs on Mar 18, 2011 15:59:35 GMT -5
Hi All,
I'm still here!! have been reading the posts.. sorry hadn't had a chance to reply. Thanks for all the great suggestions!! I am on the section 8 waiting list.. have been since 2004!! Every year I send a letter asking the status.. every year it just says I'm still on the list, but if i read the section 8 guidelines right the other day.. I actually make too much money.. you need to be 30% below the median income in area.. or something like that.
I feel like I need to move because of mom's BF's temper. He blows up unexpectedly and I don't want my son there when that happens.. I work 45 min away from home so my son is there every day before and after school with him.. when he's there and I don't like it. They have already had a few rough "moments" and I'm afraid it will escalate out of hand.
My mom doesn't really want me to go but she doesn't ask the bf to leave either so... apparently he is going to pick up the slack of my contributions once I'm gone..
I am looking into stopping the karate.. my son says he doesn't really enjoy it anyway.. go figure but I do have six months left on the contract. I'm meeting the school leader on Tuesday.. so i will let you know what happens there.
I am also waiting on a reply from my school about my loans..
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