Virgil Showlion
Distinguished Associate
Moderator
[b]leones potest resistere[/b]
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 15:19:33 GMT -5
Posts: 27,448
|
Post by Virgil Showlion on May 6, 2015 23:02:59 GMT -5
Testing one more time.
Dear cat: Do you get a kick out of the fact that the more you abuse them, the more they love you?
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 12, 2024 9:29:30 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 7, 2015 11:59:20 GMT -5
Why do you like that Panda bear so much? Were does it hurt?
|
|
steff
Senior Associate
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Joined: Dec 30, 2010 17:34:24 GMT -5
Posts: 10,780
|
Post by steff on Jul 9, 2015 1:15:08 GMT -5
I have new questions/comments for my kitty babies...Miss Onyx Ahny-Ahny Sissy Squirrel Girl and Mr Mordy Bud Buddy Bear Squeaker Boo. 1. why do your damn names keep getting longer and longer? oh yeah, me. 2. Mr My Buddy Bear....can I request a little meow as notice before you throw yourself off of a piece of furniture, the bar, the countertops, the shelves, etc and into my general direction? If you give me some warning, then I might actually start catching you BEFORE you have to dig in with your claws half way down my boob. I have some scratches that could be hard to explain. And when/what did I do exactly that gave you this massive sense of trust to where you will throw yourself off of any and everything and in my general directions, knowing that I'll at least try to catch you? 3. Miss Sissy Girl, you do realize if you stop sleeping outside the door to the room that meanie Miss O is in, when she comes out, she won't automatically whack you in the head? Give her some space and she'll take longer to find you and whack you. 4. To BOTH of you little cutie fuzz balls, my desk ain't big enough for both of you to sleep on at the same time. One of you is gonna have to find somewhere else to crash because yall are getting too big. My keyboard is not a pillow/bed and my mouse pad isn't a yoga mat. And nothing personal Miss Sissy Girl, but my Buddy Bear was here first. so off to a comfy chair with your fluffy ass! And Buddy Bear, I like the lamp on my desk, stop pushing it off because it's in the way of your stretch moment. 5. Mr My Buddy Bear, I know you wuv me, but I'm not your recliner. Men! You can't climb onto my shoulders, get comfy, bathe and watch tv. the purring is a nice touch & yep, I'm sucker for a sweet purr baby, but seriously, you got the desk & trust me, you can see the tv clearly from it. You don't have to lay on me to watch. And stop changing the damn channel when you walk over to climb onto your recliner! I was watching something first! I wuv you little fur babies, but seriously, stop following the meanie kitty around just to annoy her. Don't come running to me when she whacks your head for the 10th time each day. Ok, you can, but I'm not gonna feel sorry for you!
|
|
NancysSummerSip
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 19, 2010 19:19:42 GMT -5
Posts: 36,692
Today's Mood: Full of piss and vinegar
Favorite Drink: Anything with ice
|
Post by NancysSummerSip on Jul 9, 2015 8:21:11 GMT -5
Midnight, aka Demon Kitty from Hell, Why do you think that three a.m. is the right time to play with the noisiest toy you have in your toybox?
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 9, 2015 12:36:33 GMT -5
How did I miss this thread?! I have one question: How do I get your deal? I want a nice 4 bdrm. 3 bath house and patio with full maid service and loaded with special places to sleep in the most comfy manner 75% of the day. Toys, marijuana and food 24/7, getting my hair brushed whenever I want even if it's 3:00 in the morning. Being able to puke or drop a load on a brand new or expensive <<insert whatever items was chosen at the time>> and then watch as somebody else does the clean up and scooping of my crap all for free and I don't have to do anything chore wise either and may get slightly yelled at once in a while (with an apology shortly after). And Virgil thinks they have small brains. Oh. It's us that must have them.
|
|
kittensaver
Junior Associate
We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa
Joined: Nov 22, 2011 16:16:36 GMT -5
Posts: 7,983
|
Post by kittensaver on Jul 9, 2015 12:44:05 GMT -5
How did I miss this thread?! I have one question: How do I get your deal? I want a nice 4 bdrm. 3 bath house and patio with full maid service and loaded with special places to sleep in the most comfy manner 75% of the day. Toys, marijuana and food 24/7, getting my hair brushed whenever I want even if it's 3:00 in the morning. Being able to puke or drop a load on a brand new or expensive <<insert whatever items was chosen at the time>> and then watch as somebody else does the clean up and scooping of my crap all for free and I don't have to do anything chore wise either and may get slightly yelled at once in a while (with an apology shortly after). And Virgil thinks they have small brains. Oh. It's us that must have them. LOL!!!!!! soooooooooooo much (minus the MJ; No Judging!! I believe in its medicinal value but have no need for its medicinal services)
|
|
ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
Community Leader
♡ ♡ BᏋՆᎥᏋᏉᏋ ♡ ♡
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:12:51 GMT -5
Posts: 43,130
Location: Inside POM's Head
Favorite Drink: Chilled White Zin
|
Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Jul 9, 2015 14:19:49 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure the MJ she was referring to was Kitty MJ.
Kitty MJ = Catnip
|
|
steff
Senior Associate
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Joined: Dec 30, 2010 17:34:24 GMT -5
Posts: 10,780
|
Post by steff on Jul 9, 2015 14:19:53 GMT -5
How did I miss this thread?! I have one question: How do I get your deal? I want a nice 4 bdrm. 3 bath house and patio with full maid service and loaded with special places to sleep in the most comfy manner 75% of the day. Toys, marijuana and food 24/7, getting my hair brushed whenever I want even if it's 3:00 in the morning. Being able to puke or drop a load on a brand new or expensive <<insert whatever items was chosen at the time>> and then watch as somebody else does the clean up and scooping of my crap all for free and I don't have to do anything chore wise either and may get slightly yelled at once in a while (with an apology shortly after). And Virgil thinks they have small brains. Oh. It's us that must have them. My reincarnation nirvana is to come back as a well loved house cat. I am a Leo, so I think my chances are better than average that I'll make it to lazy, fat ass, well loved person trainer, I mean house cat.
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 9, 2015 14:31:00 GMT -5
How did I miss this thread?! I have one question: How do I get your deal? I want a nice 4 bdrm. 3 bath house and patio with full maid service and loaded with special places to sleep in the most comfy manner 75% of the day. Toys, marijuana and food 24/7, getting my hair brushed whenever I want even if it's 3:00 in the morning. Being able to puke or drop a load on a brand new or expensive <<insert whatever items was chosen at the time>> and then watch as somebody else does the clean up and scooping of my crap all for free and I don't have to do anything chore wise either and may get slightly yelled at once in a while (with an apology shortly after). And Virgil thinks they have small brains. Oh. It's us that must have them. My reincarnation nirvana is to come back as a well loved house cat. I am a Leo, so I think my chances are better than average that I'll make it to lazy, fat ass, well loved person trainer, I mean house cat. I'll make a deal with you. If I come back as a human you can be my cat and if you come back as a human can I be yours? And don't forget the MJ part! ETA: I forgot to respond to Kittensaver - We call cat nip MJ too.
|
|
kittensaver
Junior Associate
We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa
Joined: Nov 22, 2011 16:16:36 GMT -5
Posts: 7,983
|
Post by kittensaver on Jul 9, 2015 14:31:23 GMT -5
I'm pretty sure the MJ she was referring to was Kitty MJ.
Kitty MJ = Catnip Here is what I was referencing (copied directly from POM's post)
". . . Toys, marijuana and food 24/7, . . . . "
My house sounds like POM's, minus the marijuana . . .
ETA: Peace Of Mind, correct me if I'm wrong.
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 9, 2015 14:34:41 GMT -5
LOL! Look up!
|
|
kittensaver
Junior Associate
We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa
Joined: Nov 22, 2011 16:16:36 GMT -5
Posts: 7,983
|
Post by kittensaver on Jul 9, 2015 14:35:38 GMT -5
Got it!
|
|
weltschmerz
Community Leader
Joined: Jul 25, 2011 13:37:39 GMT -5
Posts: 38,962
|
Post by weltschmerz on Jul 9, 2015 14:38:08 GMT -5
Dear cat, When you buy your own TV, you can watch the Discovery Channel and The Nature of Things. There is no reason to have a hissy fit because I turned off your show with all the little birdies and fishies. I want to watch Dr.Who. Deal with it.
|
|
lexxy703
Senior Associate
Joined: Aug 26, 2011 13:52:17 GMT -5
Posts: 13,771
|
Post by lexxy703 on Jul 9, 2015 14:44:52 GMT -5
Desmond what is your deal lately about stealing my seat? Every freaking time I get up to refill my drink or use the bathroom I come back to find you in my seat. Last night I came home from work to find you sleeping there. From the warmth of the leather it appears you have been there all day. You have your choice of any spot in the house other than that one. I'm getting tired of moving you.
|
|
steff
Senior Associate
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Joined: Dec 30, 2010 17:34:24 GMT -5
Posts: 10,780
|
Post by steff on Jul 9, 2015 15:14:56 GMT -5
My reincarnation nirvana is to come back as a well loved house cat. I am a Leo, so I think my chances are better than average that I'll make it to lazy, fat ass, well loved person trainer, I mean house cat. I'll make a deal with you. If I come back as a human you can be my cat and if you come back as a human can I be yours? And don't forget the MJ part! ETA: I forgot to respond to Kittensaver - We call cat nip MJ too. Deal! And I got kitty pot and people pot. So we're covered! My requests when I'm your kitty is I want a pink blanket, no collar, and I don't just want tuna juice, I want some of the tuna too! I'm sooooooooooooo gonna be the ultimate princess bitchy moody cat! I'll have waited all my lives for that moment I get to flip my tail up and flounce away in a huff to my pink blanket and give people a good "I'll kill you in your sleep" look. Then you'll rush over with a bowl of tuna and juice and I might let you pet me...but probably not. but I'll forgive you in a couple of hours when my ears itch and need a scratch.
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 9, 2015 15:20:53 GMT -5
I'll make a deal with you. If I come back as a human you can be my cat and if you come back as a human can I be yours? And don't forget the MJ part! ETA: I forgot to respond to Kittensaver - We call cat nip MJ too. Deal! And I got kitty pot and people pot. So we're covered! My requests when I'm your kitty is I want a pink blanket, no collar, and I don't just want tuna juice, I want some of the tuna too! I'm sooooooooooooo gonna be the ultimate princess bitchy moody cat! I'll have waited all my lives for that moment I get to flip my tail up and flounce away in a huff to my pink blanket and give people a good "I'll kill you in your sleep" look. Then you'll rush over with a bowl of tuna and juice and I might let you pet me...but probably not. but I'll forgive you in a couple of hours when my ears itch and need a scratch. Oh, man are you going to be one happy kitty! Already do these things now and more! You even get to growl at me if your favorite food is no longer your favorite food and you want something else just because it's Tuesday!
|
|
steff
Senior Associate
I'll sleep when I'm dead
Joined: Dec 30, 2010 17:34:24 GMT -5
Posts: 10,780
|
Post by steff on Jul 9, 2015 15:24:34 GMT -5
Deal! And I got kitty pot and people pot. So we're covered! My requests when I'm your kitty is I want a pink blanket, no collar, and I don't just want tuna juice, I want some of the tuna too! I'm sooooooooooooo gonna be the ultimate princess bitchy moody cat! I'll have waited all my lives for that moment I get to flip my tail up and flounce away in a huff to my pink blanket and give people a good "I'll kill you in your sleep" look. Then you'll rush over with a bowl of tuna and juice and I might let you pet me...but probably not. but I'll forgive you in a couple of hours when my ears itch and need a scratch. Oh, man are you going to be one happy kitty! Already do these things now and more! You even get to growl at me if your favorite food is no longer your favorite food and you want something else just because it's Tuesday! puuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
|
|
lexxy703
Senior Associate
Joined: Aug 26, 2011 13:52:17 GMT -5
Posts: 13,771
|
Post by lexxy703 on Jul 9, 2015 15:32:25 GMT -5
I also want to come back as a spoiled kitty. But I want to be let outside when I want. Then when you open the door I will decide it's too hot out & I'd rather stay inside. Well for maybe 10 minutes until you are comfy then I think I'll try the back door. Oh & I want cheese as a snack
|
|
Peace Of Mind
Senior Associate
[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 16:53:02 GMT -5
Posts: 15,554
Location: Paradise
|
Post by Peace Of Mind on Jul 9, 2015 15:37:03 GMT -5
I also want to come back as a spoiled kitty. But I want to be let outside when I want. Then when you open the door I will decide it's too hot out & I'd rather stay inside. Well for maybe 10 minutes until you are comfy then I think I'll try the back door. Oh & I want cheese as a snack Nope. If I'm the mommy you are either going outside under full supervision so you don't get smooched by a car or you don't go out at all, missy!
|
|
lexxy703
Senior Associate
Joined: Aug 26, 2011 13:52:17 GMT -5
Posts: 13,771
|
Post by lexxy703 on Jul 9, 2015 15:45:07 GMT -5
I also want to come back as a spoiled kitty. But I want to be let outside when I want. Then when you open the door I will decide it's too hot out & I'd rather stay inside. Well for maybe 10 minutes until you are comfy then I think I'll try the back door. Oh & I want cheese as a snack Nope. If I'm the mommy you are either going outside under full supervision so you don't get smooched by a car or you don't go out at all, missy! Fine but you better go out & supervise me whenever I have the whim to go outdoors!
|
|
ZaireinHD
Senior Associate
Joined: Mar 4, 2011 22:14:27 GMT -5
Posts: 12,407
|
Post by ZaireinHD on Jul 9, 2015 16:11:49 GMT -5
Dear Kleo you get plenty of back massages, shoulder massages, neck massages, and temple rubs; daily! so why can't I get a back rub from you when I am laying down? I know you can cause I see you massage the blankets! while purring! why are you still scratching my leather sofa, when I purchased you TWO scratching posts? and why do you give me such meow when I get home late? you have food and water, sooo yea sometimes I work late. AWH! yea I still love ya cutie ! Cat!
|
|
ZaireinHD
Senior Associate
Joined: Mar 4, 2011 22:14:27 GMT -5
Posts: 12,407
|
Post by ZaireinHD on Jul 9, 2015 16:21:37 GMT -5
How did I miss this thread?! Thanks for the bump Steff!! Dear Kleo just what is it that you are starring at just behind me on the ceiling? no I am NOT turning around to see! just in case you're going to say HA made ya look! or worse there is some kind of ghost making funny faces? LOL
|
|
Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 64,544
|
Post by Tennesseer on Jul 10, 2015 9:00:08 GMT -5
My reincarnation nirvana is to come back as a well loved house cat. I am a Leo, so I think my chances are better than average that I'll make it to lazy, fat ass, well loved person trainer, I mean house cat. I'll make a deal with you. If I come back as a human you can be my cat and if you come back as a human can I be yours? And don't forget the MJ part! ETA: I forgot to respond to Kittensaver - We call cat nip MJ too.
|
|
cael
Junior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 9:12:36 GMT -5
Posts: 5,745
|
Post by cael on Jul 10, 2015 9:09:43 GMT -5
Betsy dearest, Thank you for kindly waiting until I woke up to pee the other night before horking all over the carpet. By doing it right when I got up, you allowed me to clean it up quickly and therefore minimize the stain. However in the future, WHY THE EFF CAN'T YOU GO INTO THE HALLWAY WITH THE HARDWOOD FLOORS TO HORK. Sincerely, mama
|
|
kittensaver
Junior Associate
We cannot do great things. We can only do small things with great love. - Mother Teresa
Joined: Nov 22, 2011 16:16:36 GMT -5
Posts: 7,983
|
Post by kittensaver on Jul 10, 2015 12:15:45 GMT -5
Dear Gizmo: We have absolutely no problem with you or any of your fur siblings using the serenity fountain in our bedroom as a drinking fountain, but why the h*ll do you feel the compulsive need to fling water all over (and down) the wall, the mirror and the dresser the fountain sits on when you're done imbibing?!?!?!?
|
|
ZaireinHD
Senior Associate
Joined: Mar 4, 2011 22:14:27 GMT -5
Posts: 12,407
|
Post by ZaireinHD on Jul 10, 2015 19:41:56 GMT -5
Dear Kleo Where or what other dimension do you go to?
When I am looking for you in the bedroom, you can only be under the bed - right? but you're not there! but then later on you come from the bedroom. so where is it that you are coming from?
Why is it you come running up when I shake your bag of treats or open a can of moist food? but when I call you it takes ummm......some time for you to come up.
and when we have our sleep all dam day contests on the weekends, don't get mad at me for going to work on Monday!
Note to EE on Monday when I wake up, Kleo will jump on the bad and basically ball up next to my chest! which makes me comfortable and puts me back to sleep! Puts me into sleep competition mode! She knows dam well what she's doing! LOL
|
|
Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 64,544
|
Post by Tennesseer on Jul 10, 2015 19:49:05 GMT -5
Dear Sport,
I know you are getting senile at the ripe old age of nineteen. I know you don't like drinking out of the water bowls by your food in the kitchen. I know you used to like to drink from the bathroom faucet in the master bedroon but because of your age and infirmity, you can no longer jump onto the bathtub side, then onto the toilet and then onto the bathroom sink counter to drink from the dripping faucet turned on just for you.
I know you now want me to pour water from the bathroom sink into a bowl for you so you can now drink water that comes from the bathroom sink faucet.
But is your senility so bad that you won't drink from the bowl on the bathroom floor which I just poured for you five minutes ago and because five minutes later I go into the bathroom, you follow me, and won't drink from the water bowl until I fill it with water again. I just filled the water bowl for you five minutes ago. You drank from it. It's the same damn water from five minutes ago for pete's sake. Is five minute old water too stale for you?
P.S. Your breath stinks like hell.
|
|
toomuchreality
Senior Associate
Joined: Sept 3, 2011 10:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 16,906
Favorite Drink: Sometimes I drink water... just to surprise my liver!
|
Post by toomuchreality on Jul 14, 2015 20:58:15 GMT -5
Dear Kleo Where or what other dimension do you go to? When I am looking for you in the bedroom, you can only be under the bed - right? but you're not there! but then later on you come from the bedroom. so where is it that you are coming from? Why is it you come running up when I shake your bag of treats or open a can of moist food? but when I call you it takes ummm......some time for you to come up. and when we have our sleep all dam day contests on the weekends, don't get mad at me for going to work on Monday! Note to EE on Monday when I wake up, Kleo will jump on the bad and basically ball up next to my chest! which makes me comfortable and puts me back to sleep! Puts me into sleep competition mode! She knows dam well what she's doing! LOL Sorry Z, Kleo sounds like the smart one, in this situation. TennesseerDo you REALLY expect your cat to drink that stale old, 5 minute OLD water?! You probable expect the poor thing to drink from the same bowl too. Disgusting! Seriously, that's abuse! Gee. I'm considering turning you in to the water police. You all make me laugh. Mainly cuz I know it's all so true. Thanks!
|
|
Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 64,544
|
Post by Tennesseer on Jul 14, 2015 21:23:26 GMT -5
Dear Kleo Where or what other dimension do you go to? When I am looking for you in the bedroom, you can only be under the bed - right? but you're not there! but then later on you come from the bedroom. so where is it that you are coming from? Why is it you come running up when I shake your bag of treats or open a can of moist food? but when I call you it takes ummm......some time for you to come up. and when we have our sleep all dam day contests on the weekends, don't get mad at me for going to work on Monday! Note to EE on Monday when I wake up, Kleo will jump on the bad and basically ball up next to my chest! which makes me comfortable and puts me back to sleep! Puts me into sleep competition mode! She knows dam well what she's doing! LOL Sorry Z, Kleo sounds like the smart one, in this situation. TennesseerDo you REALLY expect your cat to drink that stale old, 5 minute OLD water?! You probable expect the poor thing to drink from the same bowl too. Disgusting! Seriously, that's abuse! Gee. I'm considering turning you in to the water police. You all make me laugh. Mainly cuz I know it's all so true. Thanks! With Sport watching me, and if my back hurts too much, I will fill a glass with water from the bathtoom sink and pour it into the water bowl on the bathroom floor. Sport will not drink it. He has to see the water emptied from the bowl into the sink and then hear the water from the faucet directly filling the bowl before he will drink it. Very fussy. Very fussy.
|
|
thyme4change
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 13:54:08 GMT -5
Posts: 40,774
|
Post by thyme4change on Jul 14, 2015 22:07:27 GMT -5
For my elderly cat:
1) Can't you sit on the cushion next to me? Why do you need to yell and yell until I move over? 2) You have lived with me for 19+ years, in two houses. Can't you figure out what my legs look like and not stand directly behind them? It was one thing when you were young - but now that you are so fragile, we both need to make sure I am not stepping on you.
For my young cat:
1) Why do you keep beating up my old girl? She is no threat to you. 2) WTF? About pretty much everything else.
For my middle aged cat:
1) You are so cool, can't you hang out with us just a little bit more?
|
|