zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 10, 2014 19:36:43 GMT -5
It actually was an infection. How it got there is one of life's mysteries.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2014 12:56:01 GMT -5
Hope that means the wedding is still on for 1 Jan! Mazel tov!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2014 17:09:49 GMT -5
Also, Zib ... we too got married late in life (as I've said before, we did everything ass-backwards ... I got pregnant, DH moved in, he sold his apt and bought my ex out of the house. We finally decided to get married when DS3 was 7).
We got married at the town hall, so no religious ceremony. But at (relatively) the last minute we decided to have a big party. We sent out invites 2 months before. To our amazement, nearly everybody came. We had about 100 people here, with people from literally every continent.
We hired a private caterer, and did it at home in our garden for 7000 euros (about 10K). We had an amazing time! Our wonderful best friends two doors down offered their garden for the afternoon, which allowed the caterers to set up our garden for dinner.
The weather was wonderful, it was literally the only Sat that month (July) that it didn't rain.
Whatever you both decide, I hope you have an amazing time too!
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zibazinski
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I did it!
Dec 12, 2014 7:47:21 GMT -5
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 12, 2014 7:47:21 GMT -5
I'm getting strong hints from people to have a party sometime later. Unless it's someone else's nickel, not happening. Other than my dress, which is new and cost $80, I'm reusing everything else i already had.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 12, 2014 7:48:54 GMT -5
I'm getting strong hints from people to have a party sometime later. Unless it's someone else's nickel, not happening. Other than my dress, which is new and cost $80, I'm reusing everything else i already had. We're not hinting. We're telling you flat out to have a party and invite someone from the boards to report back to us!
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 12, 2014 9:03:31 GMT -5
Party at POM's!
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 12, 2014 10:18:00 GMT -5
You know, you can live stream the wedding on Skype and we can watch it. Or maybe Pay-Per-View cable TV. Especially if the bio brat is there. We will pay extra to see her face slowly melt to the floor as she sees dear old Bank of Dad actually do something nice for himself that doesn't involve opening his damned wallet.
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taz157
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Post by taz157 on Dec 13, 2014 16:39:41 GMT -5
I'm getting strong hints from people to have a party sometime later. Unless it's someone else's nickel, not happening. Other than my dress, which is new and cost $80, I'm reusing everything else i already had. We're not hinting. We're telling you flat out to have a party and invite someone from the boards to report back to us!
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Dec 13, 2014 17:22:51 GMT -5
I'm getting strong hints from people to have a party sometime later. Unless it's someone else's nickel, not happening. Other than my dress, which is new and cost $80, I'm reusing everything else i already had. We're not hinting. We're telling you flat out to have a party and invite someone from the boards to report back to us! How are you going to reuse a wedding cake and all the dirty paper plates and glasses? -Geeze, lighten up and spend a little, especially if DF is paying for it!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2014 20:56:32 GMT -5
I agree, Blonde Granny, they should lighten up and spend a little, even if they split the costs. Zib, there are two possibilities: either the people who are "hinting" that you should have a party are: a) freeloaders who are trying to get you to pay for them to have a free place to party and spend your / DF's money on free food and alcohol b) people who truly love you and / or your DF and want to share in your joy DH and I are coming up to our 10th wedding anniversary (21 years together) and we still talk about what an incredible wedding we had, and how all these people who loved us so much pushed us to have a party we initially didn't want to have. We were so reluctant. But when we finally decided to (because they were all pushing us), they all came, from literally all over the planet. We had people come in from NY, CA, England, and even Australia and Japan ... it was an incredible time. It sounds like this wedding has been a very long time coming ... decades even. I would go with the party. :-)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Dec 13, 2014 21:03:29 GMT -5
The more you spend on a party, the less for his kids to inherit!
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Dec 14, 2014 16:39:08 GMT -5
I'm getting strong hints from people to have a party sometime later. Unless it's someone else's nickel, not happening. Other than my dress, which is new and cost $80, I'm reusing everything else i already had. We're not hinting. We're telling you flat out to have a party and invite someone from the boards to report back to us! LMAO!!! WTH?! How did that happen? Hopefully you'll be getting your new place here soon. But I can help.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 14, 2014 17:32:22 GMT -5
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Dec 18, 2014 12:19:04 GMT -5
So, how soon are you having kids? Just kidding, very happy for you. I hope NancysSummerSip can perform it for you and milee can act as witness. Provided you don't spend a penny more than you already have, that will be a true YM wedding.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 18, 2014 12:24:04 GMT -5
So, how soon are you having kids? Just kidding, very happy for you. I hope NancysSummerSip can perform it for you and milee can act as witness! I'm on the opposite side of the state, but who knows? Maybe I can Skype the vows? I'd really like to see the bio brat's face when the I Do's are done. It won't be all about her and the loss of the spotlight alone might make her do the Wicked Witch of the West thing and turn into a puddle on the floor.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 12:25:05 GMT -5
I'm chickening out. I'm looking for any excuse to not go through with it.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Dec 18, 2014 12:29:37 GMT -5
*wraps some socks around zibazinski's chilly feet*
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mollyanna58
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Post by mollyanna58 on Dec 18, 2014 12:30:01 GMT -5
Just do it and get it over with. You'll be happy you did.
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Dec 18, 2014 12:30:32 GMT -5
Just remember how long you guys have loved each other and how much you've gone through to get to this point. A piece of paper doesn't change what's already true for you.
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NancysSummerSip
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Post by NancysSummerSip on Dec 18, 2014 12:43:39 GMT -5
I'm chickening out. I'm looking for any excuse to not go through with it. DON'T
EVEN
THINK
ABOUT
IT.
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taz157
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Dec 18, 2014 12:46:34 GMT -5
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Post by taz157 on Dec 18, 2014 12:46:34 GMT -5
Just remember how long you guys have loved each other and how much you've gone through to get to this point. A piece of paper doesn't change what's already true for you. Yeah that!
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taz157
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Dec 18, 2014 12:46:46 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by taz157 on Dec 18, 2014 12:46:46 GMT -5
I'm chickening out. I'm looking for any excuse to not go through with it. DON'T
EVEN
THINK
ABOUT
IT.
Yeah that!
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taz157
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Dec 18, 2014 12:47:12 GMT -5
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Post by taz157 on Dec 18, 2014 12:47:12 GMT -5
Just do it and get it over with. You'll be happy you did. Yeah that!
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 18, 2014 12:53:03 GMT -5
DON'T
EVEN
THINK
ABOUT
IT.
Yeah that! Don't make us come down there.
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Wisconsin Beth
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Dec 18, 2014 12:53:55 GMT -5
Unless he's turned into a total d-bag who's been snowing you for decades to get a nurse with a purse as I think you put it in a different thread...
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 13:24:22 GMT -5
No, he isn't turning into a total d-bag. I'm just looking for excuses. It was okay when it was WAY out there in the future but the future is closing in on me. I know it's a piece of paper and I know everyone wants it. The last time I tried to do it, I had a panic attack. I've never had one before. What if I do it again? In front of my kids, in front of DF?
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Firebird
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Post by Firebird on Dec 18, 2014 13:45:29 GMT -5
What if I do it again? In front of my kids, in front of DF?
Do they need to be there? (The kids, obviously - you're kind of stuck with DF being there ) I say this because you have absolutely ZERO obligation to do this wedding any way that doesn't make you feel comfortable and safe. I am usually of the opinion that weddings are about family and it's nice to celebrate in a way that they can share and enjoy, but second weddings are a little bit different and if it's causing you this much anxiety to think about having "an audience" then maybe it would be best to have a very small, private ceremony? Panic attacks are no joke and I hate to see you so stressed out over this I've had a LOT of experience with panic attacks and I know how I deal with them, but it's different for everyone. Would it help at all to speak with a doctor? Not necessarily so s/he can immediately write you a prescription but just to talk about the symptoms and discuss certain ways of coping with them that you can try. Maybe even have DF go along so the three of you can brainstorm ways he can help you cope with it. Often just having a game plan ahead of time (rather than "well I'll just hope this doesn't happen and freak the fuck out if it does") can help you feel more in control.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 13:48:06 GMT -5
The kids would just assume I'm having second thoughts. Still, hyper ventilating in front of them isn't my idea of mom behavior. DF says he will do whatever I want but I have to reimburse him!
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Dec 18, 2014 13:48:49 GMT -5
Honestly, who else would put up with me? He made me laugh.
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Dec 18, 2014 13:50:46 GMT -5
Honestly, who else would put up with me? He made me laugh. Do you want to come back here and hide out with some Fat Bastard? You can do this!
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