Queen of Interesting Nuts
Familiar Member
"In the end, we remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends"
Joined: Feb 14, 2013 11:05:35 GMT -5
Posts: 700
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Post by Queen of Interesting Nuts on Jun 9, 2013 13:15:09 GMT -5
I don't know whether I should continue to post. I want to say that I view this board as kind of like a diary, just with a bit more brevity, well at least I think so. I understand we all are different but I guess others view the board differently.
I write like I speak, like I am in conversation with you. Apart from a very few all of my posts are just observations and I like to hear others' observations about seemingly inane things like realizing my DD doesn't have carbs with dinner. I guess I don't really expect to be snarked on, I just put a topic out there for conversation...maybe I have the wrong board for that or the wrong people on this board for that. That is my mistake I should know by now.
I get plenty of adult conversation and our conversations brings up these things. Things that make you go hmmm, that is all it is. HMm DD doesn't have a carb with dinner, interesting. That's all it is.
I am very sorry, I really am if my posts annoy people. I think I can tell posts that are really calling for empathy and help and I try to treat them with respect, I have my failings but I don't EVER read a thread and it be blighted by my dislike of a poster. I have failed a few times but I try to follow the rule if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything.
Adios mi amigos, may you go in peace.
Namaste.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 9, 2013 13:31:23 GMT -5
Naggie, I hope you continue to post. I posted before reading more, so I've modified this post. My biggest recommendation is don't say something is OK and then start a thread decoupled from what bothers you. We all have our opinions and on this board you are going to get unsolicted advice. Its the nature of message boards in general.
Not everyone is going to get your sense of reality. You can either let that bother you or find a way to deal with it. I can't think of any poster especially ones who post often who haven't had their motives questioned and received unwanted advice. Its a lot like life actually. You can make the choice to actively ignore people. I finally took someone's advice and put some posters on ignore. You might want to try it. (I haven't read all the threads yet but so far pretty snarkless.)
I will say I missed the post was about having carbs with meals. There are some diet philosophies were you have carbs(starches) and proteins at different meals. Easier on the digestion.
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steff
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I'll sleep when I'm dead
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Post by steff on Jun 9, 2013 13:36:56 GMT -5
I wasn't trying to "snark". I was offering what I thought was some advice from a mom of a 19 year old who is starting to break out on his own. I also simply repeated my experience with the same kiddo who IMO, should have known how to cook, but needed to be walked thru doing it on his own a few times. I also simply mentioned that what I would put together for a "meal", he's going to short cut it & leave off the sides because he doesn't feel like messing with it.
I will gladly go and delete my posts if they are so offensive to you that they are going to run you off the board in a burst of drama.
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mmhmm
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It's a great pity the right of free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible.
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Post by mmhmm on Jun 9, 2013 13:46:51 GMT -5
Any message board, I don't care where it is or what it's about, is going to be problematic if you let it be. If you're highly sensitive and take things personally (even from relative strangers), you'll find discomfort on most message boards, unless they're professional boards, or subject-targeted. You need to have a pretty thick skin if you're going to enjoy your time posting with folks you really don't know very well, if at all. If you don't have a thick skin, a message board is a good place to develop one, but it takes work. If you can make it happen, it can be quite helpful in other areas of your life. MOO
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jun 9, 2013 16:47:33 GMT -5
mmhmm, what does MOO stand for? My opinion o.... or something else?
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Jun 9, 2013 17:16:20 GMT -5
Who was snarky? I just mentioned that a lot of people have given up carbs. I didn't know that would offend you. I thought it was a fact. Another way to approach the situation. I even agreed that I wouldn't live without potatoes, but many people are going that direction.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 17:50:10 GMT -5
But you didn't just say, hmm, daughter doesn't eat carbs with dinner. You went on how it was a failure, on your part and theirs...
its part of what makes it seem like perhaps, sometimes, you might dramatize more thn necessary...
i like your posts. I think maybe you need to be a little more open/ less reactive, or more willing to just release others opinions sometimes.
We all have stuff we can work on.
Oh, andi rarely eat grains anymore. I've given most up slowly, as my body does better without them, although it does like potatoes.
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Phoenix84
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Post by Phoenix84 on Jun 9, 2013 17:51:55 GMT -5
I don't know what exactly was said, but I do know that sometimes the posters here can get pretty ruthless. I've contemplated rage quitting a couple of times. Sometimes people say things on this message board they'd never say in real life because they are hidden behind a computer screen. But that's not just here, that's anywhere.
If you feel like quitting is the best option then good luck to you, but I'd encourage you to take a deep breath, maybe take a break for a while, and come back if you like posting here.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 17:53:48 GMT -5
What did I miss? I commented on that thread. It just seemed like a rambling conversation.
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Jake 48
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keeping the faith
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Post by Jake 48 on Jun 9, 2013 19:42:30 GMT -5
Naggie, I hope you stick around
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2013 19:57:36 GMT -5
But you do this every time Naggie. You post for a month or two, get ticked off, delete all your posts & disappear for a while. But, you do always come back it seems. So, why not just step away for a few days to de-fuse and then come back without the exit drama.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Jun 9, 2013 21:36:19 GMT -5
I have no idea what was said, or even which thread, but my question would be: Why would ANYONE take ANYTHING posted by some anonymous person on a message board seriously enough to be personally upset by it? Other people only have power over you if you give it to them. And most people are FOS anyway.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jun 10, 2013 9:41:06 GMT -5
Amen. I get some good advice when asked and I get some kicks in the teeth. Both are good for me. If I don't want advice I don't ask. I don't even vent because someone will give advice.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 9:45:50 GMT -5
1:Other people only have power over you if you give it to them.2:I don't even vent because someone will give advice.
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whoisjohngalt
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Post by whoisjohngalt on Jun 10, 2013 9:48:36 GMT -5
Oh lordy - another one - should I stay or should I go thread.
Why do people need so much validation from STRANGERS??
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 9:49:55 GMT -5
Zib, I think you should rethink your policy on not venting. Venting can be therapeutic and I think you are missing out on an effective tool by not venting.
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Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 10, 2013 9:56:31 GMT -5
Naggie, I have 1 thread on WIR that I use as a diary/blog of sorts. Well, ok, I also used the kids thread as a kid diary too. Maybe that's the solution for you - 1 thread.
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Jun 10, 2013 10:03:33 GMT -5
I have a thin skin too, but like what mmhmm posted, the boards help me with that.
You seem to get upset that people misunderstand your posts. But your posts are all we have to go on. If we aren't understanding your meaning, that gives you the chance to look at your communication style and find areas to improve in. That can help IRL too.
Also, you posted to ask if you should continue posting. I'd take a look at what response you had hoped for and see what need is driving that and what other parts of your life fill that need, or what could and go after it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 10:07:19 GMT -5
Sure you should keep posting! Just remember that we're going to keep posting too, and you might not like everything you read.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 10:08:16 GMT -5
I like to hear others' observations about seemingly inane things like realizing my DD doesn't have carbs with dinner. I guess I don't really expect to be snarked on, I reread that thread, and don't understand where you're getting "snarky" from.
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swamp
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THEY’RE EATING THE DOGS!!!!!!!
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Post by swamp on Jun 10, 2013 10:09:47 GMT -5
Sure you should keep posting! Just remember that we're going to keep posting too, and you might not like everything you read.
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Rocky Mtn Saver
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Post by Rocky Mtn Saver on Jun 10, 2013 10:11:22 GMT -5
I like to hear others' observations about seemingly inane things like realizing my DD doesn't have carbs with dinner. I guess I don't really expect to be snarked on, I reread that thread, and don't understand where you're getting "snarky" from. I didn't see anything that seemed at all something to take offense at or be bothered by.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Jun 10, 2013 10:22:02 GMT -5
Is it because I said I didn't follow your post? If so, that isn't snarky - that is me having low reading comprehension. Seriously, I get tripped up by menus and street signs.
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Green Eyed Lady
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Look inna eye! Always look inna eye!
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Post by Green Eyed Lady on Jun 10, 2013 10:22:48 GMT -5
Naggie? Some of your threads evoke strong emotions from people. I'd think you would know that since the subject matter you post evokes strong emotions from you. I'm pretty sure most people here aren't trying to be snarky, but rather it's a version of "message board tough love". People see you (in their opinion) going down a long road of unhappiness and try to advise you. Cause that's what a message board is about. I honestly think 95% of the people here want the best for you and sometimes people (including me) can't see the forest for the trees when the issue is so personal and close.
Now there are some people here who are just mean and it appears to make their day to come here and snark at somebody. Put those people on ignore, be sorry at how unhappy their lives must be when they have to come here to take out their frustrations, or tell them to ESAD. But if you stay here, you are going to read things you don't like. Hell...if I let the meanies run me off, I'd have been here two days. Some acutally sent PMs (according to a poster who is no longer here) saying "don't talk to Gel..if she comes into a thread then leave". LOL!! I'm ashamed to admit that I went around to like 50 different threads and posted nonsense to see if they really would leave. Do you really even want that kind of person talking to you anyway?
The thing is, if you ask for advice, you are going to get it. People aren't going to say, "Naggie...you are doing the right thing. Keep it up." if they don't feel that way. Take what you can use and discard the rest. But it's unfair to ask and then get upset when you get an answer. That is no more fair than the snark, IMO.
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Bob Ross
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Post by Bob Ross on Jun 10, 2013 12:30:20 GMT -5
Rule #1 of the internet: Don't post anything that you can't handle being snarked on for. Rule #2 of the internet: NEVER under any circumstances apologize for anything you say on the internet. This indicates weakness because it shows you give a sh#t (that's another good rule. Don't give a sh#t) which is like blood in the water for the circling sharks. Rather, stand your ground until your dying breath, even if you're dead wrong. If everyone says the sky is blue but you say the sky is red, then the sky is red, f*#kers.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 13:29:35 GMT -5
I wasn't trying to "snark". I was offering what I thought was some advice from a mom of a 19 year old who is starting to break out on his own. I also simply repeated my experience with the same kiddo who IMO, should have known how to cook, but needed to be walked thru doing it on his own a few times. I also simply mentioned that what I would put together for a "meal", he's going to short cut it & leave off the sides because he doesn't feel like messing with it. I will gladly go and delete my posts if they are so offensive to you that they are going to run you off the board in a burst of drama.
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Deleted
Joined: Oct 6, 2024 6:29:51 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Jun 10, 2013 13:30:19 GMT -5
I don't know whether I should continue to post. I want to say that I view this board as kind of like a diary, just with a bit more brevity, well at least I think so. I understand we all are different but I guess others view the board differently. I write like I speak, like I am in conversation with you. Apart from a very few all of my posts are just observations and I like to hear others' observations about seemingly inane things like realizing my DD doesn't have carbs with dinner. I guess I don't really expect to be snarked on, I just put a topic out there for conversation...maybe I have the wrong board for that or the wrong people on this board for that. That is my mistake I should know by now. I get plenty of adult conversation and our conversations brings up these things. Things that make you go hmmm, that is all it is. HMm DD doesn't have a carb with dinner, interesting. That's all it is. I am very sorry, I really am if my posts annoy people. I think I can tell posts that are really calling for empathy and help and I try to treat them with respect, I have my failings but I don't EVER read a thread and it be blighted by my dislike of a poster. I have failed a few times but I try to follow the rule if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything. Adios mi amigos, may you go in peace. Namaste. naggie, don't let them get you down.
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mrsdutt
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Post by mrsdutt on Jun 10, 2013 14:21:18 GMT -5
Naggie? Some of your threads evoke strong emotions from people. I'd think you would know that since the subject matter you post evokes strong emotions from you. I'm pretty sure most people here aren't trying to be snarky, but rather it's a version of "message board tough love". People see you (in their opinion) going down a long road of unhappiness and try to advise you. Cause that's what a message board is about. I honestly think 95% of the people here want the best for you and sometimes people (including me) can't see the forest for the trees when the issue is so personal and close.
Now there are some people here who are just mean and it appears to make their day to come here and snark at somebody. Put those people on ignore, be sorry at how unhappy their lives must be when they have to come here to take out their frustrations, or tell them to ESAD. But if you stay here, you are going to read things you don't like. Hell...if I let the meanies run me off, I'd have been here two days. Some acutally sent PMs (according to a poster who is no longer here) saying "don't talk to Gel..if she comes into a thread then leave". LOL!! I'm ashamed to admit that I went around to like 50 different threads and posted nonsense to see if they really would leave. Do you really even want that kind of person talking to you anyway?
The thing is, if you ask for advice, you are going to get it. People aren't going to say, "Naggie...you are doing the right thing. Keep it up." if they don't feel that way. Take what you can use and discard the rest. But it's unfair to ask and then get upset when you get an answer. That is no more fair than the snark, IMO. ESAD ?? Eat sheet and die ?? I'll have to remember that one.
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Peace Of Mind
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[font color="#8f2520"]~ Drinks Well With Others ~[/font]
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jun 10, 2013 14:23:30 GMT -5
Amen. I get some good advice when asked and I get some kicks in the teeth. Both are good for me. If I don't want advice I don't ask. I don't even vent because someone will give advice. Bitching IS venting! Suck it up, Naggie! You come back so why keep losing your post count? ETA: I want to point out that I did not post on subject thread nor was I snarky at any time. That time.
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Green Eyed Lady
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Look inna eye! Always look inna eye!
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Post by Green Eyed Lady on Jun 10, 2013 14:24:23 GMT -5
LOL!! It's just a figure of speech, mrsdutt. I certainly wouldn't want anyone to die.
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