Loopdilou
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Post by Loopdilou on Aug 15, 2012 1:59:23 GMT -5
When I was 8 years old I got incredibly sick. Fevers up to 105 for weeks, controlled down to low hundreds with tylenol and cool bath. Doctors thought it was the flu until I lost all vision in my left eye. I was hospitalized, had a spinal tap, was put on high dosages of prednisone for months and months.. I had surgery, spent years having followups.. whatever, point is, I'm blind in my left eye. This had a lot of not so good effects on my childhood, confidence levels, whatnot. I forget about it most of the time, but every so often science makes an advance and I have hope that some day I'll see again. ( www.telegraph.co.uk/science/science-news/9473387/Scientists-develop-bionic-eye-which-could-restore-sight-to-the-blind.html ) Won't change how my life has turned out, but it would mean everything to me. Anyway, do you have a big event in your life that you feel steered your course?
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Aug 15, 2012 12:37:51 GMT -5
At this point, this thread has 142 views. Clearly nobody can top yours. My sympathies for your condition, and my applause for your strength.
Due to my international upbringing, I transferred schools mid-year in such a way that I only had 5 months worth of 4th grade. As such, it was decided I should have a full 4th grade year. I would certainly have had a very different pool of friends had I not had that experience. It is possible I'd have gone to a different college, which would certainly have changed who I married and where I work.
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needanewjob
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Post by needanewjob on Aug 15, 2012 12:44:23 GMT -5
For me, it would be getting shot.
On the day it happened, I was visiting another base in Iraq and was sitting in our temporary office when I heard gunfire echoing through the courtyard. I could have stayed in the office, but we didn't have connectivity to send reports, so I got my gear and ran to the roof. I am proud of the fact that I ran TO the sound of gunfire and I feel that I am more confident as a result.
After getting back to the US, though, it changed my relationship with my wife. She expected me to have difficulties adjusting and was constantly looking for the "new me". So if I got upset or acted other that what she thought my "norm" was, I got comments like "you really have changed".
Also, my children can see my scars every day and know what they are. We have regular conversations about getting shot which is not exactly normal, but I never avoid the conversation. Neither of them want to join the military because they don't want to get shot too.
Funny story though is after getting 4 booster shots at her doctor, my daughter was crying her eyes out and she said "daddy, I got shot just like you"
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8 Bit WWBG
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Post by 8 Bit WWBG on Aug 15, 2012 12:46:01 GMT -5
Damn, mine is a total white whine compared to you guys!
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2012 12:51:28 GMT -5
My Mom letting my Dad adopt me. We would have left him within a year of the wedding if he couldn't threaten to fight for custody of me. My whole life would have been unbelievably different. One of the easiest to describe is that I would never have lived in another province.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Aug 15, 2012 12:59:58 GMT -5
Awww. That's a sweet story. I'm with WWBG... my story really can't top going blind or being shot, though it does bear some similarities to Loop's. Loop, did they ever figure out what caused your blindness? Between my first and second years of law school, I contracted a severe viral infection in my left eye. At the time, I was told I would probably go completely blind in one eye and possibly in both. I had already taken out $40K in student loans, had no health insurance, and was not really prepared (financially, mentally, or emotionally). It was a tough couple of years and I ended up losing most of the peripheral vision in one eye. After I'd graduated and gotten a job, my lawsuit against the manufacturer of the product that had caused this infection settled and I ended up getting a lump sum equal to about one year's salary (just mine, not household). I'm still very conflicted. On one hand, those few years were the darkest part of my life. There were times I seriously thought about suicide. DH almost left me because I was damn near impossible to live with. And the physical pain of the infection was not insubstantial. On the other hand, much of my current life wouldn't be possible without that infusion of cash, which - barring a lottery win - I wouldn't have received if not for the infection. I still don't know how I feel about that, or if it changed me for good or for bad. Maybe time will tell.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Aug 15, 2012 13:05:25 GMT -5
I think every day you choose a path, and it takes you to the next fork.
My parents moved 4 times before I was 8 - all were life changers, because I was in a new state, with new people (and in the case of the last move) in a new school. My school changed their boundaries, and in one year all but one of my friends were at the old school and I was at the new school. I'm sure it was life changing. My best friend's father was transferred and moved to another state. If she had stayed in town, I might be a totally different person. I met my college boyfriend because I went to Carl's Jr. for lunch. I met my husband because I went to the bar that night. You really never know what insignificant thing will have a large impact on your life.
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needanewjob
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Post by needanewjob on Aug 15, 2012 13:05:32 GMT -5
"Damn, mine is a total white whine compared to you guys!"
It's not a competition (Loop and I still win though) but I think that most people have some pretty good stories if they are willing to share.
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kittensaver
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Post by kittensaver on Aug 15, 2012 13:11:34 GMT -5
I'm also with WWBG and Mid - can't top the OP. But I did have a life-changing health experience. 8 years ago (after almost 5 years of going to rounds and rounds of doctors - details boring) I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia Syndrome, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Multiple Chemical Sensitivities. (I was a wreck, trust me). The doctor who finally gave me the diagnosis offered me FOUR off-label-use Rx's and told me there was nothing else that Western medicine could do for me, and that over time I would need progressively stronger stuff. He also offered to sign my permanent disability papers. I went home and spent two days having a HUGE pity-party for myself; then it occurred to me: if Western medicine was "done" with me, then I was free to do for myself. I spent a ton of time researching alternative methods, hooked up with a naturopathic physician, a chiropractor and a trigger-point massage therapist, and in about 18 months they had me pain-free. Along the way I had to change almost everything about the way I was living and (not) taking care of myself. But at least I'm not disabled, still working, living pain-free and enjoying my second lease on life.
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Loopdilou
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Post by Loopdilou on Aug 15, 2012 13:15:53 GMT -5
Me too! Some events are big, some are small. Mine really did dramatically alter my direction in so many ways that I can't relate them all, but I've made decisions since then that have changed my life - going to AZ and meeting Dark being a huge one, of course.
The blindness was from an unknown viral infection that caused my eye to swell, created a hole in the back of my eye (usually only happens to the elderly), and killed my nerve ending. I regained minimal vision over the years, but not enough for my brain to turn the eye back "on"; my right eye is completely dominant.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Aug 15, 2012 13:16:54 GMT -5
And getting busy in the burger king bathroom.
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Post by BeenThere...DoneThat... on Aug 15, 2012 13:22:26 GMT -5
...I got hitched...
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Aug 15, 2012 13:22:46 GMT -5
I thought of another one.
On the Friday of fall break during my second year of college, I was supposed to come home and go out drinking with my cousin. My car's battery went dead that afternoon and I didn't end up getting home until about 9pm. I was tired and called my cousin to bail. He was already drunk when I talked to him.
That night he tried to drive home (6 blocks) and wrecked his car, killing himself.
If I had been there, I don't know what would have happened. I might have been able to stop him. I might have been killed, too. Who knows? It's one of those nights I wish I could go back and change, but then I start thinking about the butterfly effect and wonder what else would be changed...
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ontrack
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Post by ontrack on Aug 15, 2012 13:28:00 GMT -5
I thought of another one. On the Friday of fall break during my second year of college, I was supposed to come home and go out drinking with my cousin. My car's battery went dead that afternoon and I didn't end up getting home until about 9pm. I was tired and called my cousin to bail. He was already drunk when I talked to him. That night he tried to drive home (6 blocks) and wrecked his car, killing himself. If I had been there, I don't know what would have happened. I might have been able to stop him. I might have been killed, too. Who knows? It's one of those nights I wish I could go back and change, but then I start thinking about the butterfly effect and wonder what else would be changed... OT, but that movie was so sad. I just wanted it to work out and it just kept getting worse
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Aug 15, 2012 13:34:27 GMT -5
I know! I hate Ashton Kutcher but that's a great movie.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2012 14:04:45 GMT -5
Sliding doors moments... I don't know. I've been thinking since morning, but not too hard. I kind of like where i am... and am a firm believer that if any little thing were different, even the bad stuff, well, then, what would i be? ... might be better, but... well, that kind of seems ungrateful for what i have at the moment... I like where i am, so we'll leave it at that...
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Post by The Walk of the Penguin Mich on Aug 15, 2012 14:16:09 GMT -5
Yeah.....last fall, when after feeling lousy for a couple of days, I couldn't walk.
I took myself to the ER and it turned out I had an abscess that infected both hip prosthesis. Both hips were removed, I had to go on LTD and am wholly dependent upon another person for almost everything right now.
They're putting me back together now, I have a 4th surgery scheduled in October. Then I get o rehab myself, to relearn how to walk. Hopefully, I will still have a job when all is said and done.
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jaya3300
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Post by jaya3300 on Aug 15, 2012 14:19:48 GMT -5
Life altering moments for me: immigrating to this country as a baby and enrolling in a private college.
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Loopdilou
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Post by Loopdilou on Aug 15, 2012 14:24:43 GMT -5
Sliding doors moments... I don't know. I've been thinking since morning, but not too hard. I kind of like where i am... and am a firm believer that if any little thing were different, even the bad stuff, well, then, what would i be? ... might be better, but... well, that kind of seems ungrateful for what i have at the moment... I like where i am, so we'll leave it at that... I rarely question whether or not my life would have been better, bit I love ruminating on what events put me where I am now. There are a ton of those, but what happened when I was 8 was such a huge thing that I can definitively point at it and say "That! That is what put me here." Would my life have been radically different had it not happen? No clue! But it changed a lot of things. My confidence (largely tied to body image, but it also reduced my ability to do a lot of things other 8 year olds do and left me with feelings of inadequacy), my friends, how my parents treated me, it eliminated my biggest dream. Those reflect on what I became in ways I can point to and ways I can't even imagine. ETA: I think some of it has to do with the complete randomness of the event. Nothing led up to it. It was so rare that there was only one other documented case.
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2012 14:29:48 GMT -5
And getting busy in the burger king bathroom. did you also do the humpty dance?
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Loopdilou
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Post by Loopdilou on Aug 15, 2012 14:32:53 GMT -5
And getting busy in the burger king bathroom. did you also do the humpty dance? Eww.. no bathroom, but the humpty dance is why I married him.
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on Aug 15, 2012 14:42:46 GMT -5
I've whined about mine before. My mom not letting me skip fifth grade soured me on school for a couple years, and led fairly directly to me dropping out my freshman year. I have no idea what if any changes it would have had on my life if it hadn't happened. Maybe none. I might have dropped out anyway. However, of all the stupid shit I did as a kid and teen, that's the one I'd go back and change if I could. It's also one of the few things my mom still regrets.
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CarolinaKat
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Post by CarolinaKat on Aug 15, 2012 14:45:47 GMT -5
Message deleted by CarolinaKat
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Aug 15, 2012 15:01:27 GMT -5
When I was 13, I chose to leave the small town in MT that I had lived in most of my life to join my mom in Reno. I could have stayed with my father and brother. I left. Changed my entire life.
At 18, I qualified for a full ride from University of Alaska, Fairbanks, but I never got the paperwork. Instead of contacting them, I chose to attend UNR, where I also had a full ride.
At 24 (it took me 6 years to get my BA), I was set to join the Peace Corps. I was simply waiting for an assignment. But then I realized that I was feeling like my life was on hold until after I got back from the Corps- not that it was on hold until I got the assignment, but that it was on hold until after. I realized that wasn't the proper mindframe to go into that kind of commitment with and pulled myself out.
A few months later, my BF (now DH) asked me to move to Seattle with him.
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Colleenz
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Post by Colleenz on Aug 15, 2012 15:04:25 GMT -5
This thread should be like a bat Signal for Toughtimes...
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Sum Dum Gai
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Post by Sum Dum Gai on Aug 15, 2012 15:07:03 GMT -5
I don't know. When your life is being threatened every 23 minutes, and you're surrounded by people that are in grinding poverty, constant pain, under death threats from the mob, have medical conditions that most doctors don't even know exist, etc., etc., how you do you pick just one life changing moment?
ETA - The close calls thread though... if anything will get her back that would be the one. Of course, she might already be back. It would take her an awful long time to type them all out. We'll have to check that thread next week and see if anyone posted a novel at the bottom.
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Aug 15, 2012 15:19:05 GMT -5
Yeah.....last fall, when after feeling lousy for a couple of days, I couldn't walk. I took myself to the ER and it turned out I had an abscess that infected both hip prosthesis. Both hips were removed, I had to go on LTD and am wholly dependent upon another person for almost everything right now. They're putting me back together now, I have a 4th surgery scheduled in October. Then I get o rehab myself, to relearn how to walk. Hopefully, I will still have a job when all is said and done. Oh bless your heart. I don't think I could cope well with that. Actually I think my DH would have to kill me, I would be so bitchy.
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thyme4change
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Post by thyme4change on Aug 15, 2012 16:26:43 GMT -5
Hellz ya I do. It is pronounced with an "umpty."
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2012 17:13:05 GMT -5
My father committed suicide when I was five, leaving my sister and me in the custody of my mentally ill mother who was on furlough from the state mental hospital. She promptly left the state, but not before one of my aunts (a lawyer) convinced her to put $20,000 in trust for my sister's and my education. $20,000 was a lot back in 1959.
There are two lifechangers in that paragraph. If my father had not committed suicide, he would have likely gone to jail. He had gotten caught up in one of his conman brother's schemes; my uncle did go to jail, by the way. There would have been no money to take care of his family. With his decision, he left SS benefits, VA benefits, and insurance money (including a paid-up house that got sold). I like to think he thought of us, but who knows.
The second lifechanger was, of course, the trustfund. My mother blew through the rest of the money quickly. But there was never any doubt that I would go to college . . . the money was there. I also got braces and a car when I graduated from college. It wasn't a fancy car, but I started being a grown-up with zero debt.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 15, 2012 17:20:21 GMT -5
The "butterfly effect" is based on a short story by Ray Bradbury that I used to teach. It doesn't share the plot, though. There is an election in the short story, and the good guy wins. This rich guy goes back in time to hunt dinosaurs and is warned not to step off the path. He panicks when he sees the dinosaur and does step off. Everything seems normal except he stepped on a butterfly. When he gets back, the bad guy won the election.
I just thought of the name of the story: "The Sound of Thunder" or something like that.
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