Having anything you want

[thyme4change]

The more I get to "know" you, Thyme, the more I think we'd be friends in RL.

Yes, but on here you are getting the uncensored me. In real life, I try to be civil.

[Deleted]

Wait. Are we all contestants on "Can You Top This?"

I have a loving and loved family, a Perfectly Good Cat, a nice place to live, somewhere to go and something to do every day, and peace of mind.

I've been to Europe and to tropical isles (more than once...actually many times) and all over North America. I've lived in upscale places and rubbed elbows with the rich and famous, some mere acquaintances, some good friends.

Sounds like the OP is over privileged and under happy. Contentment isn't measured by how much or how many or how new or how big. My face cream is really merely a lotion...Wally World's version of Oil of Olay. I used to have a live-in housekeeper/nanny. Now I'm a cleaning lady by choice. And my car is eight years old.

I already have everything I want and everything I need and could probably afford to get more, but why?

[NancysSummerSip]

I already have everything I want and everything I need and could probably afford to get more, but why?

and

[hoops902]

Aug 1, 2012 13:20:01 GMT -5 susanb said:

A thread in YM got me thinking about the phrase "You can have anything you want, but not everything you want."

I think the average American can have two or three things on the following list (not inclusive), but runs into trouble when they try to have the whole list.

Nice housing
Prestige car
Travel
Fancy clothing
Gourmet food
Pampering - skin care, pedicures, etc.
Expensive social life - drinks out, concerts, etc.
Toys - tech or outdoor
Kids
Your idea here

What do you think? Do you have two or three things? If so, what are they?

Cripes, I don't have any of that.

[susanb]

Aug 1, 2012 16:21:53 GMT -5 @missrigby said:

Wait. Are we all contestants on "Can You Top This?"

I have a loving and loved family, a Perfectly Good Cat, a nice place to live, somewhere to go and something to do every day, and peace of mind.

I've been to Europe and to tropical isles (more than once...actually many times) and all over North America. I've lived in upscale places and rubbed elbows with the rich and famous, some mere acquaintances, some good friends.

Sounds like the OP is over privileged and under happy. Contentment isn't measured by how much or how many or how new or how big. My face cream is really merely a lotion...Wally World's version of Oil of Olay. I used to have a live-in housekeeper/nanny. Now I'm a cleaning lady by choice. And my car is eight years old.

I already have everything I want and everything I need and could probably afford to get more, but why?

No, but if we were, you would win with a live in housekeeper/nanny.

Holy judement. The point of this thread wasn't to brag or because I am not content. I was simply talking about splurge areas.

Most of my life is pretty frugal. I splurge on skin care and travel. That does not make me a braggart nor an ingrate.

I was simply curious what areas other people felt were worth splurging on. Sheesh.

[hurley1980]

Hmmmm, we have a small old house in a blue collar part of town, but it is ours and we can remodel however we want to suit us. We have a 2003 dodge truck w/ payments, and a 2005 chevy cobalt thats paid off. No fancy clothing or pampering, not a lot of toys, and we don't want kids. We do spend a lot on food, alcohol, traveling and our social life, but we are firm believers that the experiences you have in life are going to make you far richer and happier than any material items (above the necessities). I really must admit that we pretty much have everything we want, or will be able to get the things we want that we don't have yet in time. I'm not one of those people that wants a fancy car and a big house and high end clothing though. My next car is going to be a rebuilt 1960's Ford Galaxy or something along those lines. If we buy another house it will prob be around 1500-2000 sf in an average neighborhood. I can do without all the stuff. Its just more crap to take care of, and I'm too lazy to do that.

[thyme4change]

Sounds like the OP is over privileged and under happy.

This isn't the first thread that I've got that sense from susanb. I hope everything is okay for her.

[Deleted]

susanb, this thread combined with the thread from a few day ago...the one where you apparently take umbrage when asked what you do...

C'mon!

[thyme4change]

She is just so far superior in her earning capacity, that she should just never be asked about her work. It is plain rude.

[973beachbum]

Nice housing
Prestige car
Travel
Fancy clothing
Gourmet food
Pampering - skin care, pedicures, etc.
Expensive social life - drinks out, concerts, etc.
Toys - tech or outdoor
Kids

Well I have kids.

Seriously

We don't travel except to rural PA to see family. (if you want a good laugh ask people about our KFC wedding)
Fancy clothing-Not any stretch but around here flip flops are church atire.
Gourmet food-mid
Pampering - skin care, etc- mid-All bought with coupons
Expensive social life - We have kids.
Toys - tech or outdoor-low-mid unless my old tube TV counts.
Prestige car- Someone asked my son what color my car was and he replied "plaid", nuff said.

We do live in a place I love and the beach is our back yard. I also get to send my kids to great public schools that don't have all the drama that people here post about all the time. So I will take my deal. ;D

[susanb]

Aug 1, 2012 17:53:10 GMT -5 thyme4change said:

She is just so far superior in her earning capacity, that she should just never be asked about her work. It is plain rude.

I feel sufficiently put in my place. Well done Thyme and Rigby.

[Deleted]

Aug 1, 2012 13:20:01 GMT -5 susanb said:

A thread in YM got me thinking about the phrase "You can have anything you want, but not everything you want."

I think the average American can have two or three things on the following list (not inclusive), but runs into trouble when they try to have the whole list.

Nice housing
Prestige car
Travel
Fancy clothing
Gourmet food
Pampering - skin care, pedicures, etc.
Expensive social life - drinks out, concerts, etc.
Toys - tech or outdoor
Kids
Your idea here

What do you think? Do you have two or three things? If so, what are they?

We eat pretty nice food, and have a house.

My main goal is financial security; I want that more than anything else.

After that, I get a kick out of dreams like growing watermelons from seed to seed, or building a climbing tower in my yard.

Poor DF though. I asked him about his dreams, and they are all things like "going to the moon" and "being knighted by the queen." I'm not joking. "Having a castle" is third on the list, and I'm going to see if we can do it for him in our lifetime. It should theoretically be possible to approximate a castle, or buy a part share in one. Depending on how space tourism and our finances progress, #1 might be on the table far in the future.

[midjd]

Leave Susan alone!

How many times have we told Doxie "you can have anything you want but not everything you want"? It's true. And when you try to have the nice house + nice car + eat out every night + iPhones + everything else - without the salary to back it up - you get into trouble.

We all have our splurge areas and our scrimp areas. I think it's an interesting thread topic, and something fairly fresh (if I see one more thread about the Olympics or why poor people suck, I'm gonna scream).

[susanb]

Thanks, Mid. I really didn't think this was controversial.

Also, I thought that a 10 year old car would balance out spending a couple hundred bucks a year on fancy face cream, but I guess I am a bad YM sinner.

[midjd]

Join the club. The only people who aren't going to YM Hell are Phil and WCP

[Sum Dum Gai]

Well I have kids. [image]

Seriously

Good, I'm not the only one. Looking at the list that was about the only thing that jumped out at me. Those little booger factories are expensive.

[Peace Of Mind]

Aug 1, 2012 19:06:08 GMT -5 susanb said:

Thanks, Mid. I really didn't think this was controversial.

Also, I thought that a 10 year old car would balance out spending a couple hundred bucks a year on fancy face cream, but I guess I am a bad YM sinner.

I just want to know about the fancy face cream! Does it work? Is it worth the money and will I look bee U tee ful?

We have a decent house in a decent neighborhood. Not real small and not large.

Car is old, cute and sporty. Not prestigious by any means but I love it.

Hate traveling.

No kids but love, love, love our fur babies and spoil them rotten. The wild life too. We spend a small fortune on food etc. for all of them.

What were the other questions? Oh! Social, food and booze. Yes, yes, and yes. But we don't like being social all the time. We have become homebodies. But we eat what we want when we want and where we want.

I found this thread interesting.

[susanb]

Aug 1, 2012 19:28:26 GMT -5 Peace Of Mind said:

Aug 1, 2012 19:06:08 GMT -5 susanb said:

Thanks, Mid. I really didn't think this was controversial.

Also, I thought that a 10 year old car would balance out spending a couple hundred bucks a year on fancy face cream, but I guess I am a bad YM sinner.

I just want to know about the fancy face cream! Does it work? Is it worth the money and will I look bee U tee ful?

We have a decent house in a decent neighborhood. Not real small and not large.

Car is old, cute and sporty. Not prestigious by any means but I love it.

Hate traveling.

No kids but love, love, love our fur babies and spoil them rotten. The wild life too. We spend a small fortune on food etc. for all of them.

What were the other questions? Oh! Social, food and booze. Yes, yes, and yes. But we don't like being social all the time. We have become homebodies. But we eat what we want when we want and where we want.

I found this thread interesting.

Creme de la mere. It has worked wonders for me. I had really bad adult acne + scars until I started using it. Like many people with acne, I was afraid of moisturizer, which is why my skin produced so much oil. It is really thick and I only wear it every other night because of the cost, but I no longer have ance or scars, which is awsome.

[Peace Of Mind]

Do wrinkles count as scars?

[shanendoah]

See, but asking what I splurge on is different then telling me I can't have it all.
We live very happily on my income and have pretty much everything we want, so I consider that we have it all. Doesn't mean we don't splurge.
We splurge on having a timeshare. We have loved every minute of it.
We splurge on going out to our favorite restaurants with our friends.
We splurge on having cable internet (DSL is not an option) and currently, lots of cable.
We splurge on the toys/games we want- though we don't have all the toys/games we could.

At the same time, we're not blowing the budget or really even stretching the budget to do these things because we built them into the budget.
There are plenty of things we don't have/don't do - no smart phone or iPads, I get my hair cut roughly every 6 months. I think DH last got his hair cut for my step-dad's funeral in 2004. I don't wear makeup. But I don't think of any of that as not having it all- we don't have it because we don't want it.

Again, it all really goes back to perception.

[tallguy]

Aug 1, 2012 19:09:48 GMT -5 midjd said:

Join the club. The only people who aren't going to YM Hell are Phil and WCP

Oh wait. You were SERIOUS??!! DA-AMN!!

[skubikky]

Aug 1, 2012 13:27:19 GMT -5 susanb said:

Right. Of course. I mean that there are a few areas people can splurge on.

For example, I live in a 3,000 square foot house in a normal neighborhood, but I take international vacations and use ridiculously expensive skin cream.

There's really no set rule. Each of the things you listed are things my DD does and she's 26.

-we travel internationally, but live in a modest rural setting
-own and ride horses(de rigueur in the upper crust set) and attend posh charity events associated with the horsey set(because I volunteer with Pony Club and run a silent auction at a CIC** horse event(as in eventing)).
-went to a fancy prep school in NYC but attended state university
-have eaten at some of the "finest" restaurants in the world, but prefer my mother's cooking?
-go to the spa for pedicures on a regular basis but never a manicure as I'd ruin it in short order when I do chores.
-love German cars and how they ride but drive a Toyota SUV as it better fits my day to day needs....(but could well afford to buy one)...where I live a "prestige" vehicle would be a fully loaded Ford F-350.
-have two kids(grown and out of the nest), never considered them a luxury but I can see your point in including it on the list.


I think, based on your other posts, that you're aspiring to enter what you perceive is "higher society" than that which you've lived in obviously your whole life. You're being exposed to people that operate on what you believe is a different plane.
Class isn't found in the things you listed, that's the window dressing. And don't get me wrong, living well is absolutely the best and no one need apologize for it. True class, is how you make someone feel welcome and comfortable. Very few people actually have true class. Wealthy or not.

[skubikky]

Aug 1, 2012 16:21:53 GMT -5 @missrigby said:

Wait. Are we all contestants on "Can You Top This?"

So glad you mentioned this game which I've, on this board, accused others of from time to time. Oh and have indulged in to some degree myself.

[susanb]

Aug 2, 2012 5:25:59 GMT -5 skubikky said:

I think, based on your other posts, that you're aspiring to enter what you perceive is "higher society" than that which you've lived in obviously your whole life. You're being exposed to people that operate on what you believe is a different plane.
Class isn't found in the things you listed, that's the window dressing. And don't get me wrong, living well is absolutely the best and no one need apologize for it. True class, is how you make someone feel welcome and comfortable. Very few people actually have true class. Wealthy or not.

Wait. So, money can't buy me class??? Is that what you are trying to say? Is that you Countess?

[Sum Dum Gai]

Wait. So, money can't buy me class???

Money can't buy anyone class. You've never seen those obnoxious yachts named Slippery When Wet? There's always at least three in every marina in the country.

[wvugurl26]

Aug 2, 2012 13:02:34 GMT -5 susanb said:

Aug 2, 2012 5:25:59 GMT -5 skubikky said:

I think, based on your other posts, that you're aspiring to enter what you perceive is "higher society" than that which you've lived in obviously your whole life. You're being exposed to people that operate on what you believe is a different plane.
Class isn't found in the things you listed, that's the window dressing. And don't get me wrong, living well is absolutely the best and no one need apologize for it. True class, is how you make someone feel welcome and comfortable. Very few people actually have true class. Wealthy or not.

Wait. So, money can't buy me class??? Is that what you are trying to say? Is that you Countess?

Money buys you toys, not manners and knowing how to behave. You can conduct yourself in a classy manner without being rich.

[susanb]

Aug 2, 2012 13:23:54 GMT -5 wvugurl26 said:

Aug 2, 2012 13:02:34 GMT -5 susanb said:

Wait. So, money can't buy me class??? Is that what you are trying to say? Is that you Countess?

Money buys you toys, not manners and knowing how to behave. You can conduct yourself in a classy manner without being rich.

Right. I was making a joke. It was clearly a bad joke. I aspire to treat people half as well as my mother does and she grew up in poverty.

I don't think anyone here has mentioned money buying class. If I did think that I would probably spend more money on status items like cars and clothes instead of traveling, which no one except my close friends even knows about.

[midjd]

I think Susan has displayed a lot of class in this thread. She certainly hasn't insulted anyone, can't say the same for others. And I'm not sure why some of you are intent on tearing her down.

Really, is it our mission to drive away all the reasoned, moderate posters?

[raeoflyte]

Aug 2, 2012 13:43:01 GMT -5 midjd said:

I think Susan has displayed a lot of class in this thread. She certainly hasn't insulted anyone, can't say the same for others. And I'm not sure why some of you are intent on tearing her down.

Really, is it our mission to drive away all the reasoned, moderate posters?

[thyme4change]

Really, is it our mission to drive away all the reasoned, moderate posters?

ummm - are you new here?