sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 22, 2011 11:28:43 GMT -5
We do have a problem with my new nephew- his dad won't share! He is a baby rocker and doesn't like to share at all. Seriously the man could sit in one spot rocking the baby for hours and it doesn't phase him one bit. May have to have a talk with him about Sharing! Just picked up Pants for the hospital and brought her home to hang with the boys for a few hours. I feel so loved- She saw me fron like 100 yards away and yelled "She-SHA!!!!!" and just ran straight for me and leapt into my arms. Course then I taught her the "naughty" words to jingle bells so I broke her for the day. Told her to tell mommy that Uncle Nate taught her the whole "jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg" etc.
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ses
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Post by ses on Dec 22, 2011 11:55:16 GMT -5
I haven't posted much this month due to being sick and also not having any Christmas spirit. Guess i'm not alone on that last item. I have grand plans but no follow through. My holiday decorating consists of a red tablecloth and a holiday centerpiece from years past and a one foot tall crocheted Christmas tree in the living room. I WILL make one batch of cinnamon corn, I hope. Then I will know it is Christmas.
I, too, am a "stress" cryer. I hate it, but can't control it. Thankfully it doesn't happen much.
I have spent way too often this month; although, I am still in budget so I am not going to fret too much. Yesterday I did calculate my annual grocery budget (which includes way too much holiday food expenditures) and was surprised to find I was still about 7% below last year. This is surprising since I participated in the grocery inflation thread in the "Money Talk" forum and saw a 16% increase in my area. I will admit to really stocking up on some staples at really good prices during the holiday sales. I plan to make most of my own breads this year. When I do, I usually see a 85-90% savings, not to mention controlling the ingredients. It really does pay to cook at home. Healthier, too.
Yesterday I paid the contractor for most of the repairs from the terrible storm in summer 2009. Just some painting and small stuff that has to wait for some warm weather. I sure so feel poorer to see that almost $10,000 vanish from the bank account. I felt richer to see it just sit there and smile back at me on my bank statements. Time to start to build up the house repair fund, again.
Along those lines I am considering resigning from my part-time job later this spring. It is very time consuming and I'm not sure I wouldn't make as much spending that time on my investments. I enjoy the time with the students and seeing them accomplish their goals, but the political aspects are draining. Spruby, I certainly understand the necessity of completing a project to make the transition better in the future. I am already having some guilt about leaving and causing disruption, and your situation is so many times critical. Having this month long break over the holidays is beneficial in making this decision. I still don't know what my decision will be. Those nice paychecks coming in twice a month ARE really nice, no matter how big they are or aren't.
I need to get off the computer and clean up the kitchen and do some laundry. Then pick up more TP shreds, when will Calleigh get tired of this game!
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spruby
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Post by spruby on Dec 22, 2011 13:08:15 GMT -5
Thank you for the kind and encouraging words everyone.
MK - you have no idea how touched I was by the quitting suggestion. Intentionally or not it implies such faith in my ability to be OK and that taking care of myself is more important than money.
First - nice to hear I'm not the only stress crier. This has not been an issue for years. So things are really bad.
Second - I have a plan b and c and d. *Plan A was to get the job here I wanted. See a big bonfire in DC? That's my dream crushed and in a burning blaze.
Plan B - finish contracting issue, work with key contact in March - new job by June. Not the ideal job or most preferred job. But kick ass money (and work). DH retires as planned in April/June timeframe so we can move for my job.
Plan C - like Plan B - but find a closer to ideal job (less money and less work), DH can still retire and we can move or not depending on job.
Plan D - I quit. Done. Use all contacts - get a job within 6 months. Things are tight and messy and DH can't retire as planned. But we make it work.
DH retirement is a dream - he's 52 - this will allow him to pursue his dream of writing - at least for a few years. AND make our life easier by having someone at home. We've worked hard to make it possible - but it makes Plan D possible as well.
B is faster than C and I find things so intolerable I'm not willing to wait on C. But I'll be spending a lot of time over the next couple of weeks to see how to make D happen.
I really appreciate all the support. Thank you all so much. There are happy tears in my eyes right now. *And my office door is closed!
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MittenKitten
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Post by MittenKitten on Dec 22, 2011 13:38:57 GMT -5
spruby: I KNEW you would have plans in place. I just know how toxic environments leach at your self esteem and self worth. ;D Thanks for the Karma ladies! I love seeing it over 50. So in the interest of giving spruby here is Oh and I may be a bad person but I am angry with my mom. She doesn't have a life (my sis and I have suggested she try the senior center but you would think we had told her to move to Siberia. ) I asked her this morning at 11:30 if she could come over for an hour so I could get to the store. It would greatly help my schedule and stress. Her reply "I'm too tired" Mind you she was probably sleeping when I called but seriously? She lives alone, is going to spend time in my home that I am working on getting ready for the holidays, eat the food I need to buy so I can chop it up, eat the cookies I have baked and she can't give me an hour two if you give me an hour and 20 minutes and count travel time. ARG
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MittenKitten
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Post by MittenKitten on Dec 22, 2011 14:22:12 GMT -5
My social worker sent me this:
Autism Night Before Christmas by Cindy Waeltermann
Twas the Night Before Christmas And all through the house The creatures were stirring Yes, even the mouse
We tried melatonin And gave a hot bath But the holiday jitters They always distract
The children were finally All nestled in bed When nightmares of terror Ran through my OWN head
Did I get the right gift The right color And style Would there be a tantrum Or even, maybe, a smile?
Our relatives come But they don't understand The pleasure he gets Just from flapping his hands.
He needs discipline, they say Just a well-needed smack, You must learn to parent And on goes the attack
We smile and nod Because we know deep inside The argument is moot Let them all take a side
We know what it's like To live with the spectrum The struggles and triumphs Achievements, regressions
But what they don't know And what they don't see Is the joy that we feel Over simplicity
He said hello He ate something green! He told his first lie! He did not cause a scene!
He peed on the potty Who cares if he's ten, He stopped saying the same thing Again and again!
Others don't realize Just how we can cope How we bravely hang on At the end of our rope
But what they don't see Is the joy we can't hide When our children with autism Make the tiniest stride
We may look at others Without the problems we face With jealousy, hatred Or even distaste,
But what they don't know Nor sometimes do we Is that children with autism Bring simplicity.
We don't get excited Over expensive things We jump for joy With the progress work brings
Children with autism Try hard every day That they make us proud More than words can say.
They work even harder Than you or I To achieve something small To reach a star in the sky
So to those who don't get it Or can't get a clue Take a walk in my shoes And I'll assure you
That even 10 minutes Into the walk You'll look at me With respect, even shock.
You will realize What it is I go through And the next time you judge I can assure you
That you won't say a thing You'll be quiet and learn, Like the years that I did When the tables were turned.
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3catslady
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Post by 3catslady on Dec 22, 2011 14:24:25 GMT -5
I have no computer. The screen went black so I sent it to a friend and they are looking at it for me. I am not giving it to DS. I am at the library. I only go once or twice a week so I won't be on much. I am doing okay, still have crying days but not as many. I am getting things done at home and taking things down to GF's place to burn. We are going through clothes and getting them ready for the church give away. What doesn't go there will go in a yard sale box. I am working on another shawl for the church. update for the month; 21 NSD; 1 EOD. I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. sheila; I got your gift in the mail on Monday and you SHOULD have it by Saturday. If not, you will get it after Christmas.
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Dec 22, 2011 16:08:09 GMT -5
Things here are crazy. I am really tired and not feeling well and have between 20 and 30 boxes in my apartment right now. DM is being no help. All I keep hearing is "I don't feel good"- I don't either and I'm not going to get better at this rate. She has to start pulling her weight around here. And quick.
I am a stress crier. If I don't get the stress out I start screaming and not always at the person creating the stress.
And it looks like I am going to have to temporarily give up my business because of DM. Long story and I don't feel like beating a dead horse.
Did I mention I am being attacked by an over abundance of cookies....
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Dec 22, 2011 16:56:06 GMT -5
Honey- I got my SS gift today! I love it! Thank you so much!
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Dec 22, 2011 19:21:54 GMT -5
Very productive day here, I finally finished my shopping by getting my brother and his girlfriend their usual gifts and a nice soft sherpa lined flannel jacket for my grandpa. I also managed to find 2 pairs of jeans that fit and flatter me so I bought them.
Tomorrow I'm doing a video shoot (nervous!) so I got a new haircut today and love it! Trying not to preen in the mirror lol - it's very bouncy!
Still working on cleaning and getting jobs done around the house so I can enjoy my parent's visit this weekend. In the 6 weeks between Thanksgiving and New Years I will have just ONE week without traveling or visitors. That was last weekend. Sigh.
In other good news, I am almost to 80,000 miles on my car which may seem weird but I've had the car 5 years and it's been paid off for 2 1/2 years. At this mileage I'm not going to need to replace it for another 8 years. Yippee!
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reeneejune
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Post by reeneejune on Dec 22, 2011 21:23:39 GMT -5
spruby - The other box arrived on Tuesday. It's currently floating around the apartment looking for it's "home". Basically I move it from room to room until I'm happy then I'll hang it. I think it may end up in my bathroom, of all places. (what is it with ocean themed decor for bathrooms that just seems to make sense?)
As for the work situation, is there a particular person that is triggering the tears, or is it just the general situation? Is there a human resources person you could discuss the situation with?
As for me, the second round of intestinal bug is making it's rounds, this time it's vomit rather than the other end, but that isn't any better. My boss willingly took a half day today because she was feeling so badly. I don't seem to have too bad of a case, after I fought off the first wave I was ok for the rest of the day. We'll see what tomorrow brings.
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spruby
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Post by spruby on Dec 22, 2011 21:32:01 GMT -5
renee - hope you like - we have the same piece - it found a home in the bedroom! The seals are a colony in cabo san lucas!
more a situation - although one person created it and another made it worse. per my boss - they don't understand how you do it and they are threatened by you. of course "they" outrank us both.
hard to stay motivated when you have a ton of work, rated outstanding, given a huge new case but been told you won't be promoted because you are untrustworthy. mixed messages anyone??
my work style has always clashed and i've been looking for a soft exit for a while but recent events have escalated the situation.
sorry to hear about the stomach bug - those are the worst!
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Dec 22, 2011 21:37:12 GMT -5
not trustworthy?! what a crock! that makes me wanna everyone get feeling better for their holiday celebrations
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redwagon
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Post by redwagon on Dec 23, 2011 14:44:07 GMT -5
Happy holidays to all!! Have a great weekend everyone!
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Dec 23, 2011 15:49:07 GMT -5
spruby- hugs! I think the tears are a sign that it's time to move on, if only for your emotional health!
I just finished recording videos for my website and I'm so excited to get them up this weekend! The biggest challenge was keeping the dogs quiet but we got some great outtakes as well ;D
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spruby
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Post by spruby on Dec 23, 2011 18:02:07 GMT -5
Sheila - you are the *BEST* secret santa! I opened the box and it was filled with fun!!! I love everything and have already decided to use one journal for my blogging work. And the Karma quote is dead on these days!
"Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed."
Anyway you put a HUGE smile on my face. Thank you!!!!
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MittenKitten
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Post by MittenKitten on Dec 23, 2011 22:01:21 GMT -5
Merry Xmas all. Happy Hanuka to MrsL!
On celebration down 3 to go.....
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moneysquirrel
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Post by moneysquirrel on Dec 23, 2011 23:05:34 GMT -5
Update: 14 NSD and 7 CSD --
Sorry I've been missing in action but I have been relaxing as much as possible. I also have been staying home and out of the madness of what a lot of people consider the reason for the season. I am really glad that my family traditions have always been small tokens of the season and not the overwhelming displays that so many consider requirements.
Have been going through things with the intention of donating several items to charity in the next few weeks. Almost two boxes ready to go.
I want to wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!
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Honeylioness
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Post by Honeylioness on Dec 24, 2011 12:00:04 GMT -5
Hello everyone .... yes, I am still breathing! I just needed a break from some activities in order to try and get refocused on the job situation. I wrote about it here: honeylioness.proboards.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=thoughts&thread=240&page=1red-wagon - Sorry to hear that Blue is having such a rough week. It does seem that when one thing falls apart others appear to want and join the chaos. SES - My apologies for the lateness of this birthday wish. I hope you are feeling more like yourself. I greatly enjoyed our conversation the other night - what a pleasant surprise that was! 3cats - If you see this please know that I am praying for you and your current difficult situation. I am available to talk to you anytime you need an ear. I will send you a separate e-mail with my contact information. renee - Hope you manage to survive this last crazy weekend without having to hide any customer bodies. I can be a weekly captain in January if you need me to. startsmart - Glad to hear your mother is working. And good luck keeping to your schedule in getting your business records cleaned up. azmom - Great job on the day of sledding as an alternative to spending money. Sorry to hear about your father in law's situation. MrsLynch - Sorry your husband hasn't heard the final decision about the new job, unfortunately it is common this time of year. spruby - I also have the same reaction to anger at work: I tear up. I hate doing it as well since most people see that as some sort of weakness. Not sure why yelling or slamming doors, which men tend to do, is seen as just blowing off steam. But tears somehow are seen as unacceptable. The only thing that seems to work for me short term is pain. I bite the inside of my cheek or pinch myself hard until I can escape to the ladies room and get it out of my system. Muttley - Sorry, just had to chuckle at the visual of Ben getting some "naked time".Sheila - See, that is what Aunts and Uncles are for. To teach kids some of the "naughtier' things their parents won't! mizbear - So glad the package got there in time. This is the latest I have ever mailed things out. Just don't eat all that fudge in one sitting! Cards - My apologies to everyone on the list. Your cards are coming however I have just had a difficult time getting into the proper state of mind for Christmas this year. Which as I have been reading, have some others as well. I actually gave this quite a bit of thought. One of the things I came up with is that what is "essential" varies greatly from region to region, and family to family. In my family there is ONE thing that my grandfather did every year which I have not done in many years - and I do feel bad about it. Partly because I always liked it and I have the materials. Not sure why, aside from time, I haven't done it in many years. Each year Papa (my grandfather's nick name) got out his collection of over 100 small glass and mercury glass balls in a wide variety of colors. They ranged in size from a pea to a walnut. Each had a a strand of thread tied to the top in varying lengths. He would then tape each thread to the ceiling of the dining room. When I was a kid I thought it was magical how they seemed to "float" - especially at night when the lights were low and the candles were lit. I have his collection of balls still with their strings attached, and a large box of tiny pins. I just have never put them up. I should make that a Must Do for next year.
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Honeylioness
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Post by Honeylioness on Dec 24, 2011 12:57:59 GMT -5
Merry ChristmasHappy Hanukhah
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 24, 2011 19:17:34 GMT -5
Spruby_ So glad that it all got to you in time and that you are enjoying your gift 3Cats- Received your package today. Thank you so much- it is all very much appreicated
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reeneejune
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Post by reeneejune on Dec 25, 2011 1:24:41 GMT -5
Almost posted something really depressing. I'll spare you. Spent Christmas Eve (after work) with BFF and her fam. Sorta-nephew is old enough now to understand Christmas presents. Watching him open his Christmas jammies just about had me in tears, so I came home.
I made myself my traditional Christmas Eve dinner of fettucini alfredo. I think I should go to bed now.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 25, 2011 7:40:59 GMT -5
reenee- sorry you are having a depressing time of things this season. It's a difficult time of year for many people you aren't alone. Hugs to you.
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Dec 25, 2011 7:52:20 GMT -5
reenee- You know where to find me if you need to vent. Also, if I had known you were making alfredo.... Happy Holidays everyone! My family had all kinds of traditions- I made it a point as a child to promise myself that the fighting and stress that always accompanied the holidays would not be part of my adult life. I'm not into the turkey and ham with all the trimmings- I like my Christmas tree to be just as bipolar as I am. In fact, my first Christmas tree LOOKED like it had a personality disorder or 3. It had red, silver, blue and I think purple garland on it and matching unbreakable metallic colored balls and the cheap chaser lights that even though you're supposed to press the button to change them- they always change themselves. And the angel was attached with a wire coat hanger so it would stop falling off. The tree skirt was a vinyl Christmas table cloth from Dollar Tree. Baking and carols are the only things I really get into. My maternal great-grandmother used to make tons of baked goods every year. I don't however make gingerbread. The tradition I have tried to start is supporting charities during the holidays.
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reeneejune
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Post by reeneejune on Dec 25, 2011 13:54:12 GMT -5
mizbear - when BFF and I shared an apartment (before she was married) we had some interesting Christmas themes. One year was a redneck Christmas, not long after she moved in. We had to duct tape the tree to get it to stay in the tree stand (I didn't look at the trunk of the tree when I bought it and it was deformed, so you couldn't get the tree stand to tighten down on it) and we decorated with some barb wire and all the empty beer cans from the day she moved in. Because that's how you pay redneck boys to move furniture, provide plenty of free beer. The next year we had silver bells and blue balls. If you get it, careful not to choke. If you don't, don't worry about it. As for the traditional Christmas Eve pasta, one year I saw The Holiday the day it came out, and one of the characters skips the traditional Christmas Eve feast in favor of fettuccine alfredo. I thought it was a brilliant idea and I've been doing it every year since. Christmas in my family is all about the kids. It starts the day after thanksgiving when the grandkids drag the christmas decorations out of the attic for Grandma and put up the lights outside. The first weekend in December is our hometown's Christmas parade, and that afternoon all of the kids in the extended family gather to make gingerbread houses. And by extended family, that means all of Grandma's sibling's families, so some years we had as many as 60 kids under the age of 18 making gingerbread houses over the course of an afternoon! All of the gingerbread and frosting were made from scratch, which is no easy task. I made 10 one year for the kids I babysat for, and that took me nearly a week. Through the rest of the month there's trips to look at Christmas lights, school Christmas programs, band concerts, 4-H club parties, and on and on. Christmas eve was the huge potluck at Great Grandma's house where all 7 of Grandma's siblings and their families would gather with Great Grandma for the biggest family potluck you can imagine. Then on Christmas day, everyone opens presents at home, then we gather at Grandma's house to open presents there (I thought I was the luckiest kid in the world because Santa would leave me presents at home AND at Grandma's house!). And probably the strangest Christmas tradition of them all, Grandpa would always buy everyone new underwear for christmas and wrap it up in the sunday comics and tie it with bailing twine (the string that holds together bales of hay). So now there's no young kids in the family anymore. My hometown cancelled it's Christmas parade this year, and no one bothered to make gingerbread houses. Great Grandma has been gone a few years now, and there hasn't been a Christmas eve potluck in 10 years. Santa stopped delivering gifts to multiple houses because we're all too old for that now. Grandpa's been gone 7 years now, and I have to buy my own underwear. I always expected that there would be a lull between generations, but that the important traditions would still be intact by the time I had children to teach them to. So every year it's a reminder that I want to carry those traditions on with a family of my own, but that I haven't managed to start a family yet. Some years are more bitter reminders than others. One year I got a box full of toys that had been made by my Great Grandpa (who died not long after I was born) with the intent that I pass them on to my own children. A not so subtle hint from the family that they think I'm more than old enough to settle down. And of course, compounding the family stuff that comes up around Christmas is the fact that I work in retail. This year I coined a code phrase for our more...difficult... customers. All I have to do is look at a coworker and say "My, she was in a festive mood today." So, yeah, I just couldn't manage to capture any of the magic this year. Let's hope I don't start bawling at Grandma's house today. Where'd I leave my prozac again? (the reference to an antidepressant medication is a family joke; we've all been on antidepressants of varying strengths for varying lengths of time. so every once in a while one of us will grumble about passing the prozac)
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startsmart
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Post by startsmart on Dec 25, 2011 20:55:30 GMT -5
Merry Christmas everyone! My parents have left for home so it's just me and the pups relaxing at home for the evening. wanted to share my favorite picture from the day of my cousin's daughter:
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Dec 25, 2011 23:35:19 GMT -5
Hope everyone had a good day today.
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mizbear
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Post by mizbear on Dec 26, 2011 20:36:31 GMT -5
She is precious!
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 27, 2011 9:36:52 GMT -5
I am fighting a bah humbug type of mood today. Relieved that Christmas is over and that the family that doesn't live in town is leaving soon. What a long and stressful weekend. My BIL's dad lost his long battle with MS on Christmas Eve. Very sad, he had been very ill for a long time but it was still heartbreaking. Hearing my 5 year old nephew explain to me that "My grandpa lives in Heaven now" was too much. My brother continued his dipshit ways- got in a huge fight with STBEx over the kids (which was stupid on his part since it was her weekend and she re-arranged things so he could have them on Christmas Day out of the kindness of her heart. Told her he was taking the kids and she would never see them again. DS is not used to so much noise and chaos (my family - especially my brother- is VERY loud) and had a panic attack that brought on a migraine while opening presents. Was just not fun at all.
DS loved his gifts from us. We had a blast with BFF and her family - Miss Pants was a hoot. So that was all good but the hours spent at my parents have me still emotionally drained 2 full days later.
Bring on 2012!
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shanendoah
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Post by shanendoah on Dec 27, 2011 10:25:51 GMT -5
I've given up on numbers for this month. Let's just all agree that I will not meet any of my NS/CS goals, be good with it, and start fresh in January.
Sheila: Hugs to you, BIL, nephew, DS, other niece and nephew, the STBEx, and well pretty much everyone except your brother and maybe your parents (as they always seem to side with him). Glad you were able to enjoy your time with BFF and her family. Have you gotten her husband to share yet? (Given his parents' attitude, I find it really kind of sweet that he just wants to rock his sone all the time.)
It's the last week of 2011, and I've got work budget stuff to do, as well as my own, so I'm going to be knee deep in spreadsheets for the next few days.
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sheilaincali
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Post by sheilaincali on Dec 27, 2011 10:55:00 GMT -5
Shanen- he will share some if we beg He had a day trip yesterday (he is a pilot) so I drove BFF and Ryder to the Doctor for his 1 week check-up. Forgot how heavy those baby/carseat carrier things are! Little man is doing great. My parents are so just beaten down by my brother that they don't even notice half of the crap he pulls. Basically until he tries to actually shoot someone they will continue to ignore him under the opinion that "it could be worse". So frustrating. My mom and dad got each other ipads for Christmas (not knowing the each one bought one for the other). Who cares they have millions in the bank. DBro starts bitching up a storm about what a waste of money all Apple products are and that my mother was stupid for getting tricked into some "buy back" program. Goes on for like 10 minutes bitching about this and the whole family just tunes him out. So frustrating. I wish just once they would tell him to shove his opinion up his butt since their ipads have no impact on his life and didn't cost him a dime. Of course this is after he raised a ruckus because they didn't buy his daughter the actual "American Girl" brand of 18 inch doll. She is still in the throw my toys across the room when I don't get my way stage. And people wonder why I stopped going to Sunday night family dinners at my parents house.
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