Nothin' unNecessary November

[reeneejune]

The Controlled/No Spend thread is undergoing an overhaul as we get back to the fundamentals of the thread while still maintaining the comraderie that keeps us coming back and makes us successful- even if not initially.

Thanks Mittenkitten for the monthly intro and Reeneejune for organizing the weekly captains.

Here is this month's Controlled/No Spend Thread as promised. Please post your goals for the month if you would like me to include them in the bi-Monthly update.
For the new people there are no real set rules here, you set your own. The basic goal most if not all of us have are to keep track of the days we don't spend and hopefully by that work on saving money. Some are looking to put it into savings others to pay down debt.
For some they only count the day as a no spend day if they spend nothing at all. Others will count it if they keep their total under $5. Some count all spending others only count a certain part of their budget. For example I personally take $400 out of the the bank in cash for everything that is not related to vehicle expenses (like gas, oil changes, insurance etc) or the house (mortgage, utilities, HOA) If I spend out of the $400 I count it as a spend day (although if it is less then $5 I usually count it as a no spend day.) You set your own rules. Any questions feel free to ask.
You can post your no spend days daily or whenever you want, just put it in bold at the top with the first number being the number you want me to record. If you are doing daily then:
Today (or yesterday) $0 Spend day
More then one day at a time:
4/31 days $0 Spend Which translates into 4 out of 31 days in December have been no spend so far. Some use the bigger number as their goal number so do 4/15 No spend Days which means they have a goal of 15 no spend days this month.

CSD: Controlled Spend Day
BFF: Best Friend Forever
DH/DS/DD/DSS: Dear Husband, Dear Son Dear Daughter, fiance, boy friend, Dear Step-Son
DIL, MIL, BIL, SIL: Daughter in law, Mother In Law, Brother in Law, Sister In Law
NKCW: No Killing Co-Worker Day (could also be no kill DH NKDH etc)
MOAN: Moving our a$$ Now aka exercising
NS or NSD: No Spend or No Spend Day
NEO: No eating out
HTH: Hope This Helps
KWIM: Know What I mean
FWIW: For What It's Worth
IMHO or IMO: In my Humble Opinion or In My Opinion
Getting Nitzed is a now slightly outdated term referring to when you have a long post and MSN cuts you off so its in two posts instead one.
Having a Startsmart Day is referring to when you have 20+ things on your must get done in a day and you accomplish them.
Sharing the Simple Lifestyle aka Toasty;
Single Mom-KY aka Smokey;
MittenKitten aka MK;
Pt_In_NY aka Pointy;
Red2Black aka R2B2.
The Boy is Sheila in Cali's son.
the boy or Mowgli is Nsinglet's son
Blue is Red_Wagon's DH
TBear is MizBear's older niece.
ZBear is MizBear's younger niece.

Every week we try to have a question of the week (QOTW) and challenge of the week (COTW) related to the question.


Honeylioness had a wonderful answer I think really defines WHAT we are about:

"I will admit that during my first two months of lurking, I wondered just how in the WORLD someone could not spend any money at ALL for 25 days? Did they just pay all their bills one day a month, and that same day do the food shopping for the month? Like many new to the concept I saw it as horribly, and restrictively, black or white – an opinion first based merely on the name of the thread.

But once I came to understand that it was not so totalitarian and was more about finding a way that worked for you to track your spending and any “leaks” in the wallet, it has felt more like a tool and less like a punishment. I wish I could say that I have paid off five extra years from the mortgage, or now have an EF of six months take home – but alas that would not be true.

What I do have however is a better awareness of where my “leaks” are, what are my hot buttons that make me want to spend on things I really don’t need or really cannot afford right now. And an awareness of the fact when I AM spending money. I think that awareness is key to learning a new behavior or paradigm. Just like lumberlady(a member that hasn't been a regular lately but is still a much loved part of our community), some of us have had to look hard in the mirror and acknowledge that we had a problem. Until people can do that, be it an addiction to alcohol or drugs or credit cards ….. they will never really GET it."

Thanks Honeylioness!

[reeneejune]

We got a bit of a late start getting the November thread going, so I just went ahead and did it. Hope no one minds.

My goal for November is going to be 18 NSD. While I want to relax and enjoy the loosened budget, I still need to be mindful of my spending. So my spend days might be a bit spend-ier, but I need to NOT get in the habit of grabbing fast food every day.

I also have an unofficial goal of not letting my job (in retail) undermine my joy in the Christmas season. I'm already excited about getting a Christmas tree. I don't want stress to get me to a point where I just fail to want to celebrate until after it's all over. I know it's well past time for me to get out of retail, I've already noticed myself sliding into the glassy-eyed apathy of someone who's given up. It's almost like an out of body experience where I'm helping customers on auto-pilot while my brain is engaged in thinking about something else. It's eerie. And I don't like it.

[MittenKitten]

Thanks reenee!

Will have to think about my goals. Since DF now has a job that pays somewhat better I have been working on the budget. So that is my core goal, to figure out the budget. It is still going to be tight.

reenee: I know it is hard but you are going to have to have almost two lives work/life away from the place from hell. Good luck. What happened to the guy you were dating?

[shanendoah]

November Goal: 12 NS + 14 CS = 26
Today was a controlled spend as I had an ortho appt this morning to get the braces tightened. I'm almost halfway done with them.

This will also be a month with a high grocery bill as we prep for Thanksgiving, so we'll really need to watch the eating out and bring it down accordingly.
Right now it looks like the MIL will be released from the SNF the weekend before Thanksgiving. Not certain if she'll feel up to doing the stairs at our place or if she'll just want to do the dinner her apartment complex puts on. It may be wrong of me, but I'm going to hope for the latter.

I feel like I should have more to say, more words of support and cheerleading for the rest of you, but everything leading up to the surgery and now dealing with MIL in the SNF is just leaving me drained. I am so forced to focus on someone else that I am having a hard time choosing to focus on those I don't have to. (How do you mom's do it?) I feel like I am living in my own little world right now, where I want everything to be about me, me, me.
So for now, I'm doing a blanket "hugs" to everyone, and hoping that we all figure out a way to mitigate stress levels and have an enjoyable Holiday season.

[reeneejune]

MK - You have (an extremely long) PM.

Mr. Potential - I debated what to say about him in this public space, so what I'm going to go with is... It's complicated and I've discovered that he has a life situation which would normally prevent me from even going on a first date with someone. I'm doing some soul-searching as I try to decide whether to continue with the relationship or not. For now, we go out on a date about once every 2 weeks or so and I'm keeping my emotional distance.

Halloween - I hope everyone had a safe and fun evening. I freaked myself out pretty well watching my favorite paranormal-type shows. Jumped out of my skin every time someone knocked on the door. But I had surprisingly few trick-or-treaters. The apartment complex has a large population of young families, but I only had about 15 kids come to the door. And I definitely wasn't "that" house... the one with crappy candy and a stingy stick-in-the-mud handing it out. ;D

[pointy]

November goals: 21 NS and 26 No QVC

[Honeylioness]

Final October Update:

24 / 25 NEO
20 / 20 NSD/CSD


November Goals:

25 NEO
25 NSD/CSD


I have not had any time to really read, or to comment. But I am thinking of you all.

We got eight inches of heavy wet snow here. The power was intermittent on Saturday, lost it for a couple of hours on Sunday, and for about three hours yesterday.

But no power at the office from Saturday night until 10:00 am this morning. So I lost a day in my push to finish up as much as I can before Friday when I leave.

Probably won't be around much this week.

Having issues and some big emotional swings. Some of the effects are physical - and some are emotional. I feel as though I have had no time to really process.

[spruby]

November Goals

30 NSD/CSD

30 "Eating out" points - not counting T-day dinner out

10 MOANs



honey - hugs

[moneysquirrel]

Update: 1 NS Day
Goal: 15 NS Days and 10 CS Days

Just a quick hello to all.

Honey -- Hugs

[midjd]

Hugs to Honey, Reenee, Shane, and everyone else who needs em

I'm a little sad that I was so busy in October I didn't really have any time to slow down and enjoy it - it's my favorite month. Now almost all the pretty leaves are gone, our flowers died, and it's no longer fun to go walking around outside at lunch November is shaping up to be pretty busy, too.

1) Tomorrow at 9 am my BFF is FINALLLLLY home from the Dominican Republic... for good. She's been living down there 5 years (Peace Corps and NGO job). Now she is back for grad school and I can see her more than once a year! So excited!!!
2) We're hosting my family's Thanksgiving for the first time this year, which should be fun, but also extremely stressful (my family is prone to grandiose displays of emotion/interventions/dramatic flourishes around the holidays). Gonna need to work extra-hard to keep the grocery budget down for the next 3 weeks.
3) DH is hoping to finish his 62.5 hours of online training before Thanksgiving. This Friday marks the end of Week 2 and he has 31.5 hours so far. I never knew him to be so Type-A

This month's goals - 10 NSDs, 10 CSDs, 22 NEOD.

[mizbear]

I am planning 2 spends this month- 1 for Christmas shopping and 1 for business (and since everyone who is not a kid on my list likes candles- I am buying them candles out of what I sell- my BFFs will be stoked)
Everything else will be NS. I am working on school and DGMs house and everything and- honestly- I won't have time to spend money this month.

I also told DM that I will cook T-giving dinner- but they are paying for it. I bought the trimmings and whatnot for 2 years and I don't even eat the stuff. I will cook it since she will be doing chemo- but they must finance it. SO I will be cooking a ham, a turkey, 3-4 types of stuffing, limas and dumplings (hoping I can talk mother into this- I hate them), green beans, 2 kinds of sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, peas, biscuits, corn muffins, and desserts... (and hopefully DGM won't add anything to the menu this year (oh yeah and then I have to fix something for me LOL). On the bright side- I won't have to fix anything for them for a week at least. My mother will eat leftover sammies of turkey, gravy, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, and stuffing every day (they call it a gobbler- I call it gross).

HUGS to everyone who needs them.

I am counting today as a NS because the order I placed today came out of last month's budgeted business money (I had some left).

[mizbear]

UPDATE: 1NS

My mother and I had a big debate on skewed budget views- I casually reminded her that she had as much CC debt as I did a car payment. And it had all been incurred recently. She left me alone after that.

[mrslynch]

i am actually going to attempt to track this month. with all that i have going on, i've been really lax with my spending. i'm trying to save at least $1K in my personal account and i'm not going to do that if i keep spending my money. i do have a few expenses, mostly related to my photo shoot but i think that i can still swing the savings goal. i will also be spending thanksgiving in new york which mean lots of shopping.

let's try for 25/30 controlled spends. bills, gas, groceries, budgeted restaurant dinners and anything else budgeted will not count. i'm not off to a good start. i spent $6.95 on apps for research for one of my staff writing posts.

[startsmart]

Not sure if I'm going to be able to keep up in November. Here's what I have on tap:

• NaNoWriMo - which kicked off at midnight. I got in my daily word count and really like the intro to my novel. But it's going to be a daily thing to get an hour or two to concentrate on noveling.
  
• Expert Interview - is in a week and has me totally nervous. I'm practicing every day and I still need to do a head shot, get my microphone in the mail (coming Thursday!) and figure out where I'm going to sit for the call.
  
• Job Application - I randomly got interviewed for a pretty high up job for a company I really admire. They've already broken $1M in sales after a short period of time and I would love to work with their team. Only downside would be moving. So I'd like some resolution on that soon.
  
• Traveling - to Boston and Connecticut for a week so I can attend a coaching day and network then visit the fabulous Honeylioness. Also managing my business and writing while on the road.
  
• New Client - and completing the tasks we have set out this week so that he's happy and sees results and signs on for another month or two
  
• Learning/Resources - for once I am absolutely drowning in amazing things I need to learn, for work, for research and just for fun. I barely have time to do my daily tasks, not to mention continue studying but I have to keep learning. Trying to balance all the sources of info and deciding what I can shelve for later.
  
• Presents- since I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be doing Christmas presents this year I need to get out two gifts for birthdays, both blue eyes and my BFF have bdays this month and while the gifts are purchased I still need to pack and ship.
  

Last weekend was good though, Saturday I went to Napa for some wine, then met a boy for dinner. He was so cute too, insisted on taking a picture together "because I'll hate myself in 20 years if I don't" and then, completely mocking the new technology said "tweet me!" so much fun.

Last Sunday was a NSD but I still felt like I should be getting more done around the house. And Monday I ended up spending at Costco to load up on dog food, candy and a few other things. Now that I have a huge amount of leftover candy I'm annoyed but oh well. I'll drop it off at a writing party this month!

And today was a NSD, the only thing I had to purchase was some computer equipment for my business and that goes in the business accounts. I also made it to the gym today ;D so I'm feeling pretty productive and thinking I should sleep while I'm ahead!

[3catslady]

25 NSD/CSD, 2 EOD is my goal.
I spent today out of the household budget because DS took a hammer to my back doorknob. He hurt his hand trying to get my door open and rather than hit his hand on the metal door, he used the hammer on the knob. Cheaper to buy a new knob than to fix his hand and miss a day or two of work. Unfortunately, I agreed with him and now he has a new knob for his workshop as well. His kids will have no reason to enter my storage because DS is moving his tools to his storage. It never had a lock on it and I will finally have my own storage.
I think I told you about the new kitten that was dropped off at my place? She is going in to see the vet on Thursday. Now I was to have off that day but one of the other workers wanted to change with me so I told my boss that I would. I told her I have this appointment and I might be late getting to work but I would change with her.
And the new "coordinator"? She has driven 1 person to quit, one is looking for more houses to clean and then will quit, and another asked to be transferred to another store. If she keeps it up there will be new employees to go to the new store and the rest of us old ones will be gone by the wayside. If push comes to shove, I will ask to be transferred also, either to another department within this store or to another store. Then I will look into working at the new wing of the hospital as soon as it is done. My only problem is that next year I turn 65 and I don't know about the hiring situation of the elders in my area.
My eyes are hurting so I am going to bed. Have a great day all.

[sheilaincali]

Count me in for 20 NSD this month. Of course I am not off to a great start. Freaking husband. His tire feel off yesterday while he was going down the highway (luckily he had stopped by the time it finished falling off). I had to leave work, buy 5 lug-nuts and drive them out to him 35 miles away. Then he went to the tire place to have them looked at $39 later they are all balanced and rotated and fixed. Guess one rim was rusted so it would keep working it's way off. IDK. Always something.

This morning I got into work early thanks to the Boy's knowledge bowl practice and miss a huge accident that had the road I need to take to work all backed up for an hour. Of course then I had to answer the phone and find out two of our employees totaled out a company truck 2 hours from here on their way to a job. Insane.

We hadn't had an vehicle or property insurance claim in a couple of years and now so far this year we have had $10,000 in damage to a truck and trailer (fired that employee), $30,000 in damage for last week's vandalism and a totaled out truck and now they totaled out the big diesel pick up. Not good, not good at all.

Is it seriously only Wednesday? Can we call this week a mulligan and try again next week?

[sheilaincali]

Honey: Big hugs to you.

3cats: I am really confused as to why DS was trying to break into your part of the house.

mid: Happy for you that your BFF is moving back. I moved to CA when my BFF was pregnant with my niece. Stayed there 3 1/2 years and I am so glad to be back here now. It's so nice to be able to see her nearly daily. Enjoy having your friend close by.

[muttleynfelix]

That is how I am feeling right now. How is it November? Really truly how?

Hootieman - Welcome. Glad to have you on board.

mk - Congrats on DF job and best of luck on the new budget.

shannen and Honey - Hugs to both of you.

mid- Congrats to your DH on the job and working towards his certifications. Best of luck hosting Thanksgiving.

mizbear - Good job telling your mom that they would have to buy the food for thanksgiving.

sheila - Ugh what a crappy week. I feel for you.

So what does November look like for me. Well, this weekend my parents come to town, next weekend is our church bazarre, the following weekend is the 5k I am going to run (up to 2.25 miles as of Monday night, but I'm probably not going to get to run again until Saturday or Sunday), and then it is THanksgiving (and oh yeah I turn 30 how did that happen). Holy cow. Plus i would love to get some of the birthday/Christmas shopping done this month. We have 5 birthday presents to get for the nieces and nephew; plus Christmas presants for 7 of them. We try to keep it under $20 for Christmas presants and $10 for birthday although the oldest 3 for birthdays just get gift cards that are $20. Then on my side of the family, DH and I just have to do a $10 presant each for a gift exchange. DH's side they actually do presants for his 2 brothers, mom and sister. Of course that is significantly fewer people than my side. I thought I was set with $300 for Christmas and birthdays, but I already spent $30 for my BFF's b-day and when I factor in his side, we are going to be short unless I find some really good deals on stuff for the kids and oh yeah my own DS. ALthough I know what I am going to get him and it is going to be less than $100 between Christmas and his birthday.

Question: What is a good price per pound for a turkey? DH wants to a do a turkey for Thanksgiving this year (we typically do a ham because I am not a turkey person). We are hosting Thanksgiving for his side, but will be at my side for Christmas day. I think we will probably do something with his side for Christmas on New Years although that will probably be at our house as well.

[sheilaincali]

muttley- IDK but Hyvee (our grocery store) has a sale this week- buy a ham and get a free 10-12 lb turkey. DH wants to do a trial turkey this weekend so he has his game plan down for the big day. We are getting a "farm fresh" turkey from my farmer friend that I buy all my chickens and eggs from. I keep teasing him and tell him to feed "Tom" good food so he tastes extra good this year.

eta: Hy-Vee is a midwestern chain not sure if they have them in your area or not. Usually they start to go on sale pretty soon.

[muttleynfelix]

Sheila - I know Hy-Vee from my Grandparents living in Iowa. They actually just opene in our town 2 weeks ago. It has been packed recently...to the point that they have been shuttling people from a vacant parking lot 2 blocks away. I may have to stop by and see what they have.

[dakota4600]

I'm in. I know this month is going to be nuts so I'll be in for 15.

Shelia- Hugs hope your week gets better. Your DH doesn't have good luck with cars does he?

Honey- Hugs too!

3cats- Was he trying to break in to get his tools?

Mid- Yeah on the BFF moving back.

[fuzzylumpkins]

I'll throw my towel into the ring.

Until I pay off my motorcycle I'll be planning every day to be NSD. I expect the bike to be paid off Thanksgiving Weekend.

7 CSD (pay bills, grocery shop, pay for bike)
20 NSD

So far I've had 1 CSD (grocery shopping).

Startsmart I didn't expect anyone else from these boards to be participating in NaNoWriMo! Welcome to the madness!

[mizbear]

Muttleyn- Generally around here you can get turkeys between $.29/lb and up on sale depending on what you want. We usually go in the $.49/lb range for a frozen Jenny-O in the 20-25 lb ballpark. Kosher turkeys can usually be gotten on sale for about $1.49/lb.
This year we are not paying for the turkey a I am making them use the one in the freezer ;D.
I'm such a B****- Bear.

I have some definite spending goals, and other goals for this month, but I have counted- thus far- over 20 appointments this month between myself, DM and DGM and part of those are DMs chemo treatments. Which means she becomes more useless than usual. Oy vey. Not planning too much because of that.

Good luck with the writing contest- that is something I would love to get back into.

3cats- HUGS- Good luck with the kitties.

sheila- HUGS

[shanendoah]

Welcome Fuzzy & Hootie

Honey: *hugs*

[shanendoah]

red_wagon: I've been meaning to harass you over here- are you still trying to do WIRR? Just checking since you're on "my" list (the 25-50k List) and you haven't updated in a while...

[mizbear]

I've been meaning to ask those who are racers since you brought it up shan- is there a racers group for those with <$25,000 in debt? My debts all together don't come to $20,000 thank goodness.

[sheilaincali]

My rant on why technology is bad sometimes. So I mentioned this accident this morning that two of our employees got in. Pretty serious- pictures are shocking. Cop honestly said "Holy F&*K" when he saw that the two guys were up walking around after the accident. They drifted across the road going 45 mph and hit a semi!

So our salesman goes up there to clean out the truck (empty tools and that) and then go up to the jobsite to check on the guys. Boss (my dad) says- send me and Sheila a picture of the truck for insurance to see. Normal right? Then my BIL (who is super nosy) calls and asks salesman to send it to him too. So he sends it to BIL, how sends it to my Dsis who in turns texts it to one of the guys in the accidents sister and writes 'Guess your little brother is having a bad day" and leaves it at that.

She freaks out and calls her dad who in turn keeps getting his son's voice mail so he calls here all in a panic and says "Was my son in a bad accident this morning?" Now his son should have probably called his dad to tell him he was fine. But my sister shouldn't have been forwarding text message pics of this to her friends with witty comments on it.

Frustrating and completely unavoidable. She should have just kept her mouth shut and not gotten in the middle of it. People that thrive on drama and creating panic annoy me. This is the same girl that rushed to the gas station after 9/11 and called everyone she knew and told them there was a gas shortage.

Of course when the old office burned down her husband hauled there small kids there and spent the next two hours on the phone calling everyone he knew to come down and watch it burn.

[shanendoah]

miz: No matter how much debt you have (big or small) you join the Racers group for your region. I think you'd be in the Northeast, but there's a thread for finding your region. That's where you post all of your racing data.

The lists are maintained separately and combine the racers from all of the regions who have roughly the same amount of debt. Most of the posting on the list threads are simply list updates and the occassional congrats to people making it on or off of a list.

There are lists for every amount of debt from the 5500 club (0-5,500), to the 100k+ club.

[shanendoah]

sheila: I'm gonna say fault starts with your BIL. I can't blame the salesman for sending something to the boss's son in law if said son in law also works for the company. BIL should never have asked for the photo, and certainly never should have mailed it to your DSis.
But once again, this is a spot where you dad needs to step in and let people know actions were inapropriate- and I'm guessing he won't. So I will feel bad for the poor drivers' family, getting that kind of a scare.

[mizbear]

shan- Thanks. I plan on joining the racers at first of the year when I can keep up with it.

sheila- Technology is a double edged sword when it comes to emergency situations. It can be helpful when used responsibly or a PIA and hurtful.