Co-Worker being Laidoff

[salserabarby]

I just found out that one of my co-workers is being let go this afternoon. I'm crushed and i don't know if I should tell him before hand or not. I know professionally I shouldn't, but my heart is saying I should.

what would you do in my position?

[leanna]

One of the major reasons for not saying anything is that there is a slim chance something could change. In which case you would have told your friend, given him huge anxiety and caused a mess.

Whoever gave this information to you should not have. They put you in a terrible position and I'm sorry you're in that position.

Be ready to be comforting and be a friend. But in the meantime do nothing. You are not in control of this and should not take control.

[salserabarby]

toughtimes - true and I can totally see my co. doing that but they've laid off 22 people in the last two weeks. I like your idea of inviting him for drink afterwards, but I'm afraid he'll be mad at me for not telling him. I know he'll be mad just not sure if he'll direct it at me, although I have nothing to do with this.

leana - I would have rather not know anything, but I have to cut his last check.

[skubikky]

You really don't need to tell him that you knew about it before hand.

[Deleted]

Depends how close you to are. If you are just co-workers, I would say no way. if you are good friends, I would say maybe.

[showtime]

Reverse the situation

Your friend knows you are about to get laid off.
How would you feel toward your good friend, to whom you have trust and confidence in, when you find out your friend knew all along and didn't tell you?

Granted, you're thinking with a clear mind...but have you ever been upset when your friends knew something that you would've have liked them to let you know first?

-showtime

[Deleted]

Unless you are the manager, no you should not say anything to the affected person. You have non of the information that is intended to go with the layoff message he/she is getting. All you would do is induce panic and upset.
If you are cutting payroll checks, then you have a high confidentiality position & should not breach that expectation.

[reeneejune]

Be careful - you might be friends outside of work, but at work you have a duty to be an employee first. And that means not spilling the beans if you know something that others aren't privy to yet.

Look at it this way - if your employer has been laying off many employees over the last few weeks, chances are that everyone in the building is aware of it. And if they're aware of it, then they've got the idea that no one is safe. So there's a strong possibility that this friend won't be all that surprised to be shown the door. Especially if there are performance or behavioral issues involved... and you might not know about that part of the equation.

[sheilaincali]

Keep your mouth shut. Offer your sympathy to your friend when he tells you he has been laid off and leave it at that. Don't tell him you already knew or anything along those lines. You want to be a good friend but by betraying your boss' confidence you could soon be joining your friend on the unemployment line.

[bring in the new year]

What do you think you can change by telling him today. It's not like you knew two weeks ago. It's today. There isn't really anything useful he can do with the info. And when it comes out, and it will come out, you've betrayed management's trust in you. The next time they'll have to go around you and that will annoy them. Not a great thing for an employee.

So you don't tell him before management and you watch what you say when you meet him for drinks. Unless you know for sure why he's being let go, do not get sucked into this.

Yes, he's a friend. In two weeks, after he's been gone for awhile, you can find out how much of a friend he is - or if he was just a friendly co worker.

[oreo]

For me, it would depend on how you think the person will react. I, personally, would want to know so when I went in, I'd know what was coming. But I'd have the sense to not tell anyone else beforehand that I already know. At least I wouldn't go into the meeting completely clueless. Some people would react really badly and tell others, badmouth people, throw a fit, etc. If this person is that type of person, I wouldn't tell them.

[salserabarby]

Oct 20, 2011 15:05:31 GMT -5 bring in the new year said:

What do you think you can change by telling him today. It's not like you knew two weeks ago. It's today. There isn't really anything useful he can do with the info.

Your right. A day is not going to make a difference. I think this has been the most helpful comment yet.

[salserabarby]

I decided not to say anything. It's the professional thing to do and in my position I have to. I still feel terrible, but thanks to everyone for their imput.

[Sam_2.0]

Sorry you were put in that position. I believe you did the right thing, but that does not mean it was easy at all

[Clever Username]

Oct 20, 2011 13:02:16 GMT -5 showtime said:

Reverse the situation

Your friend knows you are about to get laid off.
How would you feel toward your good friend, to whom you have trust and confidence in, when you find out your friend knew all along and didn't tell you?

Granted, you're thinking with a clear mind...but have you ever been upset when your friends knew something that you would've have liked them to let you know first?

-showtime

How about this?
Instead of a layoff, you know that someone SHOULD ask for a raise, because they earn less than their department.

Or how about that friend everyone likes, but maybe should be more careful around seeing as he's on work release?

And hey, you should really save your girlfriend the trouble, the guy she's been flirting with requested domestic partnership benefits.

These are fun to imagine!

Simple. Take the emotions you're feeling now and express them when you say "I wish I could have told you. I need to keep my job."

[bluecluessubtlety]

Salser, was there any fallout?