Ava
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 30, 2011 12:23:55 GMT -5
Posts: 4,252
|
Post by Ava on Jun 18, 2011 20:23:41 GMT -5
ava, I wonder why your mother didn't keep that secret to herself. Someone came to see my mother when she was literally on her death bed to confess something they had done and wanted to 'get it off of their chest.' My mother was so upset, mainly because she felt bad because this person had carried this around with them for so long. But she also felt bad because this was something that meant alot to her and I think she had tried to block it out for many years.
What was the point?
She was talking to a friend about the old times and how hard it was to make ends meet as a single mom with two young kids. She mentioned the time I found a wallet and how she had gotten a lucky break. I overheard what she was saying and she noticed. Later that day, when her friend left, she told me the truth. I was surprised and I felt a little let down, because she's my hero. But I understand her.
I work as a head cashier and I find extra money on a regular basis. People give a 50 and get change for a 5, someone pays with a 20 and the cashier gives them change for a 10. I find the money when I count their registers at the end of the shift. I keep the extra money in the safe for a week. Sometimes the customer comes back and asks if there was extra money because they got shortchanged. I always give them their money back. If nobody claims it, I go to the register and ring up whatever, and the money goes as a sale.
A couple of months ago we changed to new registers and a new system. The first week was chaos. After that, I sat down and counted how much money we had made. It turned out I had 1,080 extra dollars in the deposit. Nobody knew. I counted it three times and then I told the manager. She asked me if I was sure. I said "yes". The manager took the money, I don't know what happened to it, nobody ever said thank you for your honesty. That's the way it goes at my workplace. But that's fine, I couldn't live with myself if I had kept the money. No amount of money is worth not being able to sleep at night.
|
|
formerexpat
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 12:09:05 GMT -5
Posts: 4,079
|
Post by formerexpat on Jun 18, 2011 21:31:49 GMT -5
Someone gets their wallet stolen. The thief calls the CC company and says, hey I found XYZs wallet and want to return it - have her contact me.
She contacts the thief and they meet to exchange the wallet. He abducts her, rapes her and kills her.
You really can't see why a CC company isn't more "helpful" in this situation?
OP - you did the right thing. I believe that everything comes full circle and doing the right thing, no matter how hard, will be rewarded better in the long term than any short term benefit one may receive.
|
|
zibazinski
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 16:12:50 GMT -5
Posts: 47,910
|
Post by zibazinski on Jun 18, 2011 21:45:17 GMT -5
DF and I just did this today. We were at an Art Fair by the water and some kids went into a restaurant and we decided to do the same. As we were walking in, I saw a wallet. We took it inside and I asked if we could page the kid because there was cash, cc's and student ID/DL and I knew it had to be one of those boys. The hostess said she'd handle it. I DID NOT want to leave it with her but DF insisted so I did. I hope she returned it to the kid.
|
|
|
Post by debtheaven on Jun 18, 2011 22:13:07 GMT -5
Ava, I'm thinking it's pretty clear why they don't want to help you move up the ladder. The fact that nobody ever said "thank you for your honesty" is pretty telling.
|
|
|
Post by debtheaven on Jun 18, 2011 22:20:50 GMT -5
Indebt, I'm glad you did the right thing. I'm with whoever said that it wouldn't have even occurred to them to keep that wallet or money.
I couldn't have slept if I had. That's how I'm wired. Indebt, I'm so glad you did the right thing, and I firmly believe it will come back to you, many times over.
Wouldn't it be funny if given that Post-it note, and the lack of debit or credit cards, it was a WIRR?! LOL
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Jun 18, 2011 22:37:22 GMT -5
No offense but can we just call this what it is..."Hey everyone, tell me what a good person I am for not being a total scumbag"...because the question is essentially "would you steal from someone?" which even if the answer were "yes" no one is going to cop to.
This is absolutely no different than someone starting a thread that says "hey my neighbor left the keys in their car this morning and I didn't steal it...would you all have done the same?"
"What would you do? Would you give it back? Be honest. I thought about keeping it when I first found it. Just for a second I thought about it. But then, I would feel so awful. Because that girl probably doesn't make that much, it was Friday, she probably got paid, cashed her check and now lost her wallet with everything in it. "
How about feeling awful being it's a horrible and illegal thing to do to someone? Forget whether or not she makes much money, whether it was her paycheck, or what day of the week it was...it's not as if it's right to steal from someone who's wealthy but somehow wrong(er) to steal from someone else.
I mean I'm glad you gave it back...but cmon...really...the entire premise is "hey everyone I didn't steal from someone today". Good for you for giving it back, the fact that people are giving karma because you opted not to be a scumbag comes off as strange in my mind though.
I just don't get these kinds of threads obviously, the idea of asking an obvious question in a blatant attempt to let people know you didn't do something illegal just makes me question the morals of people. Maybe it's just the phrasing as a question, as if the answer to the question is in any way debatable.
|
|
DVM gone riding
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 23:04:13 GMT -5
Posts: 3,383
Favorite Drink: Coffee!!
|
Post by DVM gone riding on Jun 18, 2011 23:00:10 GMT -5
way to go indebt that took a bit of work. I wouldn't have turned it into the store (I don't always trust them) but most likely would have dropped it off at the police dept. I found like 6 bucks on the floor of the store the other day. I felt guilty keeping that but didn't see anyone close by that could have dropped it.
|
|
leanna
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 28, 2011 16:33:40 GMT -5
Posts: 1,800
|
Post by leanna on Jun 18, 2011 23:49:06 GMT -5
I would never consider NOT trying to find the rightful owner of a wallet. I think, in my life, I've returned 4 wallets now. I just found one recently at Walgreens. It was near the front door, so I couldn't help but wonder if maybe the person was still in the store. There was a picture of the owner on the front of the wallet - a high school ID. So I walked around the store looking for blond girls. I wasn't totally sure, but I thought I spotted her, so I asked, "Is this you?" Sure enough it was. She hadn't even realized she lost her wallet - she was shocked and thankful.
I do think it was very honest of you OP to admit that you considered keeping it, yet you did the right thing nonetheless. While, like I said, I wouldn't have considered keeping a wallet, I certainly have my own fair share of wrong thoughts. Takes guts to admit 'em.
|
|
el1504
Junior Member
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 16:26:20 GMT -5
Posts: 161
|
Post by el1504 on Jun 19, 2011 2:45:24 GMT -5
Indebt - it was very kind of you to go to so much effort to find the girl. You really went above and beyond
|
|
happyscooter
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 5, 2011 9:04:06 GMT -5
Posts: 2,416
|
Post by happyscooter on Jun 19, 2011 7:07:35 GMT -5
Reader's Digest had a story years ago where they 'lost' some wallets with $5.00 in them to see people's reaction. Some of the people found them and turned them into the service desk with the money in tact. But when the service desk returned them to the RD staff, the money was gone. So it wasn't always the customer who was dishonest.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 5, 2024 13:20:09 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 19, 2011 7:38:07 GMT -5
Some of the people found them and turned them into the service desk with the money intact. But when the service desk returned them to the RD staff, the money was gone. So it wasn't always the customer who was dishonest. And that's why I'd want to hang onto it, find the owner and turn it over to the owner myself.
|
|
happyscooter
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 5, 2011 9:04:06 GMT -5
Posts: 2,416
|
Post by happyscooter on Jun 19, 2011 7:46:38 GMT -5
Long story on a sitcom-
Beaver Cleaver found a wallet with around $90. This was early 60s. He was around 7-8 years old. He turned it in to the PD. They told him the owners had 30 days to retrieve it and if they didn't, he could have it. On day 30 he goes to the PD. Sits on the bench beside of a woman. It's her money. She gets his name/address, says she will send him a reward. A few weeks go by, nothing. One day he gets a NICE radio in the mail from the woman. (remember, it's the 60s and kids didn't get things everyday like they do now). June realizes that Ward had bought it and mailed it to Beaver. Beaver writes a really nice thank you note to send to the lady. June says 'it's a shame the lady won't get that note.'
And Ward says something to the effect of 'yes she will.'
|
|
happyscooter
Senior Member
Joined: Jan 5, 2011 9:04:06 GMT -5
Posts: 2,416
|
Post by happyscooter on Jun 19, 2011 7:50:58 GMT -5
It was totally unexpected because in the 60s, people like the Cleavers had manners. If someone did something rude or uncouth, you just let it go. It showed their lack of nice upbringing. It was soooooo off the chart for Ward.
|
|
RoadToRiches
Familiar Member
Formerly "indebt"
Joined: Jan 4, 2011 11:08:00 GMT -5
Posts: 965
|
Post by RoadToRiches on Jun 19, 2011 11:30:06 GMT -5
No offense but can we just call this what it is..."Hey everyone, tell me what a good person I am for not being a total scumbag"...because the question is essentially "would you steal from someone?" which even if the answer were "yes" no one is going to cop to. This is absolutely no different than someone starting a thread that says "hey my neighbor left the keys in their car this morning and I didn't steal it...would you all have done the same?" "What would you do? Would you give it back? Be honest. I thought about keeping it when I first found it. Just for a second I thought about it. But then, I would feel so awful. Because that girl probably doesn't make that much, it was Friday, she probably got paid, cashed her check and now lost her wallet with everything in it. " How about feeling awful being it's a horrible and illegal thing to do to someone? Forget whether or not she makes much money, whether it was her paycheck, or what day of the week it was...it's not as if it's right to steal from someone who's wealthy but somehow wrong(er) to steal from someone else. I mean I'm glad you gave it back...but cmon...really...the entire premise is "hey everyone I didn't steal from someone today". Good for you for giving it back, the fact that people are giving karma because you opted not to be a scumbag comes off as strange in my mind though. I just don't get these kinds of threads obviously, the idea of asking an obvious question in a blatant attempt to let people know you didn't do something illegal just makes me question the morals of people. Maybe it's just the phrasing as a question, as if the answer to the question is in any way debatable. Someone peed in your Cherrios? Or is it because you are sitting in front of the computer on saturday night? It was more of a "feel good" story ya grumpy! It never happened to me before, so I told the story.
|
|
msgumby
Established Member
Joined: Feb 7, 2011 2:26:23 GMT -5
Posts: 438
|
Post by msgumby on Jun 20, 2011 11:35:46 GMT -5
I had a wallet returned once, and the lady went above and beyond to get it to me. I was flying to visit my family for christmas and left my wallet in the plane. I realized this about 2 minutes after exiting through security. I went to the airline help desk and asked if they would let me onto the plane (escorted would be fine) to look for my wallet. They said no, but they would send someone in to look for my wallet. I gave them my seat number and waited while they looked. The person they sent in couldn't find my wallet. I knew it was there, so I was convinced that person must have just pocketed my wallet. I didn't have much cash in it, but I needed my ID to avoid a hassle flying back home in about a week. The next day I get a call from my dad that someone on the next flight had found my wallet on the plane and found my dad's phone number (his address was on my DL at the time). The lady paid out of her pocket to express mail me back my wallet (so I could get it before my flight back) and all my money was still there. I sent her back a check to cover the mailing cost plus a bit extra for being so kind and getting me my wallet back so quickly. For me, it wasn't the cash, but getting back the wallet over the holidays was a huge relief.
|
|
|
Post by rmtvbrooks on Jun 20, 2011 12:13:13 GMT -5
I've had two incidents like this recently. I found a set of keys laying on top of a toilet paper package at Target. It was one of those key fobs with a panic button, so all someone would have to do is go out in the parking lot and hit the button and take the car. I turned them in to the service desk. The other was at the DMV. On my way out, I saw someone's credit card laying on the ground. I took it back inside and handed it to the lady at the counter when you walk in the door. I hope both got back to the rightful owners. I can't imagine what a headache it would be to have either your car stolen or your credit card used. My sister's car was broken into not long ago, and thankfully they only got her checkbook (her credit cards were with her in her wallet); her friend wasn't so lucky. Within 45 minutes of breaking in, the thieves were already using her credit cards! It has been a major pain for both of them; DS had to change her bank account number, which means new checks had to be purchased, new debit card issued, etc. Her friend had to have new CCs issued. It's unbelievable the amount of trouble this stuff can cause someone!
|
|
sil
Established Member
Joined: Jan 7, 2011 18:56:29 GMT -5
Posts: 396
|
Post by sil on Jun 20, 2011 12:22:33 GMT -5
You really did go above and beyond. Agree with a prior poster that it sounds like she was on the envelope system. That cash in her wallet was probably all she had for 2 weeks, possibly for the whole month, with no immediate access to credit either.
I would have turned it in to the store's manager as well. The only possible draw-back to trying to hunt down the wallet's owner, is that she may have been re-tracing her steps and already gone back to the grocery store looking for it.
|
|
hoops902
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 22, 2010 13:21:29 GMT -5
Posts: 11,978
|
Post by hoops902 on Jun 20, 2011 12:24:09 GMT -5
"It was more of a "feel good" story ya grumpy! It never happened to me before, so I told the story."
What's the "feel good" part of the story exactly? That you considered doing something illegal but didn't? That's my point. This kind of thing is a complete non-issue for 90% of the population, the only people who feel the need to report this kind of thing are the people who actually consider stealing from people as you've admitted to. I don't think that's particularly something to be proud of I guess. "Well I thought about stealing someone's possessions, but I didn't, isn't that such a happy story?"
I just find it a sad commentary on people's ethics that "I didn't break the law today" is now something people feel the need to report and seek praise for. And possibly even sadder that people's reactions seems to be that something special happened.
Obviously I'm glad you gave it back though.
|
|
sil
Established Member
Joined: Jan 7, 2011 18:56:29 GMT -5
Posts: 396
|
Post by sil on Jun 20, 2011 12:25:24 GMT -5
Oh, and I once left my whole key ring (including house and car keys) sticking out of the mailbox and my car was parked about 10 feet away from it. I was really happy to have a good samaritan track me down to return them
|
|
zibazinski
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 16:12:50 GMT -5
Posts: 47,910
|
Post by zibazinski on Jun 20, 2011 12:28:45 GMT -5
I'm still worried that the kid didn't get his money back and I still think we should have handed it directly to the kid or his parents. Going thru a middleman just invites dishonesty.
|
|
daisylu
Junior Associate
Enter your message here...
Joined: Dec 27, 2010 6:04:42 GMT -5
Posts: 7,441
|
Post by daisylu on Jun 20, 2011 12:38:24 GMT -5
I found someones cell phone once. She gave me twenty dollars as a reward. I find cell phones EVERYWHERE. I find at least 2 in the ladies room every time DH & I go to a concert. I usually hang out somewhere outside until someone comes looking for it, or until it rings. I have never had one go unclaimed for more than 15 minutes.
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,720
|
Post by midjd on Jun 20, 2011 13:08:32 GMT -5
Hoops, I think the point is that not only did Indebt not steal the wallet, he went above and beyond to find its rightful owner. Like others have indicated, turning it in to a service desk may not ensure that everything is returned intact...
|
|
moneymaven
Well-Known Member
Joined: Dec 26, 2010 10:05:04 GMT -5
Posts: 1,864
|
Post by moneymaven on Jun 20, 2011 13:13:59 GMT -5
This kind of thing is a complete non-issue for 90% of the population
Really? You have a lot more faith in people than I do.
Karma to you indebt for going above and beyond to return this to the rightful owner.
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,720
|
Post by midjd on Jun 20, 2011 13:16:31 GMT -5
Yes, that was quite obvious.
|
|
RoadToRiches
Familiar Member
Formerly "indebt"
Joined: Jan 4, 2011 11:08:00 GMT -5
Posts: 965
|
Post by RoadToRiches on Jun 20, 2011 13:47:11 GMT -5
"It was more of a "feel good" story ya grumpy! It never happened to me before, so I told the story." What's the "feel good" part of the story exactly? That you considered doing something illegal but didn't? That's my point. This kind of thing is a complete non-issue for 90% of the population, the only people who feel the need to report this kind of thing are the people who actually consider stealing from people as you've admitted to. I don't think that's particularly something to be proud of I guess. "Well I thought about stealing someone's possessions, but I didn't, isn't that such a happy story?" I just find it a sad commentary on people's ethics that "I didn't break the law today" is now something people feel the need to report and seek praise for. And possibly even sadder that people's reactions seems to be that something special happened. Obviously I'm glad you gave it back though. The "feel good story" is that the young girl got her wallet back and I was the one returning it to her, which made me feel awesome inside, that I saved someone many headaches, when in fact, there could be possibility she wouldn't see her money or wallet again if someone who decided to keep it found it. Get it now? I am not trying to ruh-roh myself over this. It's obvious what the right thing to do is. But would everyone do it? LIke I said, the though of keeping it crossed my mind for split second. I would never do it of course. But I did think about it. It's natural. Don't lie to yourself if you found a wallet with $400 cash in it, that you wouldn't even for a split second thought about keeping it..
|
|
Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 11:59:36 GMT -5
Posts: 30,626
|
Post by Wisconsin Beth on Jun 20, 2011 13:50:01 GMT -5
Between the cash (envelope system) and the "do I need it?" note, she sounds like one of our people, trying to get a handle on her life and her financial choices. I wouldn't be surprised if the reason there was no credit card in the wallet is that it is frozen in a block of ice at her house. It's nice to help a stranger, but it is even better when you get to help a fellow traveler. Sarah, that's what I thinking, more or less.
|
|
zibazinski
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 16:12:50 GMT -5
Posts: 47,910
|
Post by zibazinski on Jun 20, 2011 13:52:30 GMT -5
Maybe there is some value to those ignore buttons after all. There sure are a couple of douche canoes today.
|
|
Deleted
Joined: Oct 5, 2024 13:20:09 GMT -5
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2011 15:19:12 GMT -5
What's the "feel good" part of the story exactly? That you considered doing something illegal but didn't? That's my point. This kind of thing is a complete non-issue for 90% of the population.
I disagree on two counts.
First, I think that 90% of the population - or more - would, upon finding a wallet with $400 in it, think "Man, I could really use $400. No one would know if I kept this."
I think we all have that twinge, and I give indebt credit for owning it. I would think it. I wouldn't act on it - I would try to return the wallet, and I believe the vast majority of people would do the same, but you bet I would think it.
The other is the idea that keeping the wallet would be stealing. If I "found" a wallet in someone's purse or back pocket, that is stealing. But there is some "finder's keepers" grey area for lost or discarded items. Since there was identifying information available, it woud certainly have been immoral to keep the wallet, but illegal might be a stretch.
(disclosure: craftysarah is not a lawyer)
I like to think I am a good person, and I'm sure I would have driven to the apartment complex. But once that address turned out to be a dead end, I'm not sure I would have been checking VIN numbers in the parking lot.
I bragged all over these boards today about my net worth. Is it so wrong to ask for a pat on the back from time to time?
|
|
midjd
Administrator
Your Money Admin
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 14:09:23 GMT -5
Posts: 17,720
|
Post by midjd on Jun 20, 2011 15:25:36 GMT -5
I vaguely remember this from Property Law... the distinction turns on whether the property was "abandoned", "lost", or "mislaid". Essentially the rule is "finders-keepers" with abandoned property, and "finders-keepers" with lost/mislaid property - EXCEPT that the true owner can always come in and claim it. So if Indebt had kept the wallet, his right to the property could have been superseded only by the true owner. If the true owner never showed up, it becomes his. So would keeping it have really been "stealing"? Probably only if he refused to give it to the true owner. (This is all based on my recall from a class I mostly slept through, so take it FWIW )
|
|
|
Post by debtheaven on Jun 20, 2011 16:08:26 GMT -5
I keep wondering whether somebody on the WIR board is going to post about losing their wallet, and having some awesome guy suddenly turn up in her parking lot to return it. The stealing (issue or non-issue) is one thing. I like to think that none of us would have ever done that. But making the effort to drive to the address, finding the apt vacant, and checking out the VIN is another. We're all about the money here, since we're all on a money board. But time is money and money is time, and Indebt gave of his time when it would have been much easier for him to just hand it into the store, or the police station. I think that's what the posters are (justifiably) commending him for.
|
|