weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Mar 7, 2019 16:25:43 GMT -5
When I got divorced I waited about a year to try dating again. Well, I dated a few people I met organically and realized I just wasn't ready. So I joined an internet dating site. OMFG! The weirdos on there. One guy was actually nice but he lied about his height. I'm not cool with being 2 inches taller as I'm already self-conscious (that's a me issue, but lying is not cool). There was a guy who seemed really nice and funny and then we went to dinner and he had an album of cats on his phone! FIVE FUCKING CATS! And I had to sit and pretend like I liked looking at pictures of cats (yes, I'm too nice to just leave). I honestly thought maybe he was just not into me and looking for ways to make sure I was not into him...but nope, he kept texting me to go out again. Then there were the guys that asked me for pictures. I met my ex when I was in high school so I was not up on what people do now. I really didn't understand the first time and I told the guy I had pictures of me up. He followed up with a cock pic. This guy was in his 40s! Dear god My favorite was the guy who messaged me and asked if I had herpes. WTF kind of question was that? Do I LOOK like I have herpes??lol
I was literally on that website for a month and don't know how people do it long term. I don't know if it is easier for guys. What do people with herpes look like? Just curious.
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happyhoix
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Post by happyhoix on Mar 7, 2019 16:26:55 GMT -5
When I got divorced I waited about a year to try dating again. Well, I dated a few people I met organically and realized I just wasn't ready. So I joined an internet dating site. OMFG! The weirdos on there. One guy was actually nice but he lied about his height. I'm not cool with being 2 inches taller as I'm already self-conscious (that's a me issue, but lying is not cool). There was a guy who seemed really nice and funny and then we went to dinner and he had an album of cats on his phone! FIVE FUCKING CATS! And I had to sit and pretend like I liked looking at pictures of cats (yes, I'm too nice to just leave). I honestly thought maybe he was just not into me and looking for ways to make sure I was not into him...but nope, he kept texting me to go out again. Then there were the guys that asked me for pictures. I met my ex when I was in high school so I was not up on what people do now. I really didn't understand the first time and I told the guy I had pictures of me up. He followed up with a cock pic. This guy was in his 40s! Dear god My favorite was the guy who messaged me and asked if I had herpes. WTF kind of question was that? Do I LOOK like I have herpes??lol I was literally on that website for a month and don't know how people do it long term. I don't know if it is easier for guys. What is it with men sending pictures of their junk on their phone? Am I too old to understand the appeal of that?
One of the managers here got canned a few years back because he sent one of the temps a picture of his junk. The guy was married, with a small baby at home. I don't understand the thinking behind that - or maybe the problem was, there was no thinking. At least, no thinking with the big head.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 7, 2019 17:17:27 GMT -5
When I got divorced I waited about a year to try dating again. Well, I dated a few people I met organically and realized I just wasn't ready. So I joined an internet dating site. OMFG! The weirdos on there. One guy was actually nice but he lied about his height. I'm not cool with being 2 inches taller as I'm already self-conscious (that's a me issue, but lying is not cool). There was a guy who seemed really nice and funny and then we went to dinner and he had an album of cats on his phone! FIVE FUCKING CATS! And I had to sit and pretend like I liked looking at pictures of cats (yes, I'm too nice to just leave). I honestly thought maybe he was just not into me and looking for ways to make sure I was not into him...but nope, he kept texting me to go out again. Then there were the guys that asked me for pictures. I met my ex when I was in high school so I was not up on what people do now. I really didn't understand the first time and I told the guy I had pictures of me up. He followed up with a cock pic. This guy was in his 40s! Dear god My favorite was the guy who messaged me and asked if I had herpes. WTF kind of question was that? Do I LOOK like I have herpes??lol I was literally on that website for a month and don't know how people do it long term. I don't know if it is easier for guys. What is it with men sending pictures of their junk on their phone? Am I too old to understand the appeal of that?
One of the managers here got canned a few years back because he sent one of the temps a picture of his junk. The guy was married, with a small baby at home. I don't understand the thinking behind that - or maybe the problem was, there was no thinking. At least, no thinking with the big head.
I honestly don’t know, either. And how sad for that guys wife :-(
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 7, 2019 17:36:20 GMT -5
Dicks are NOT cute! I only want to see them live if I’m about to interact with one - not in a sad ass picture!!!!
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justme
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Post by justme on Mar 7, 2019 17:48:42 GMT -5
Dicks are NOT cute! I only want to see them live if I’m about to interact with one - not in a sad ass picture!!!! I forgot where I saw it, but it was a girl remark saying that and that a bulge pic is way more likely to entice a woman.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Mar 7, 2019 17:58:59 GMT -5
😱
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Mar 7, 2019 18:04:28 GMT -5
I put my profile on Our Time. It didn't last long.
I have no interest in a man who hunts, rides motorcycles, fishes, etc. Not my type at all.
The only guy I was truly interested was recently widowed and I thought the time was not long enough. Also, I've never had a serious relationship with a man with children (his were adults) and I didn't want to go there.
My dating life is over unless there is a miracle.
When I worked at the church, we had a nice couple who met on FarmersOnly.com. They had their wedding in the church and now have two children.
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Lizard Queen
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Post by Lizard Queen on Mar 7, 2019 18:12:23 GMT -5
I found my DH on Match. Fortunately, it was pre-camera phone days, so i never had to deal with dick pics in my internet dating adventures.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Mar 7, 2019 18:29:42 GMT -5
When I got divorced I waited about a year to try dating again. Well, I dated a few people I met organically and realized I just wasn't ready. So I joined an internet dating site. OMFG! The weirdos on there. One guy was actually nice but he lied about his height. I'm not cool with being 2 inches taller as I'm already self-conscious (that's a me issue, but lying is not cool). There was a guy who seemed really nice and funny and then we went to dinner and he had an album of cats on his phone! FIVE FUCKING CATS! And I had to sit and pretend like I liked looking at pictures of cats (yes, I'm too nice to just leave). I honestly thought maybe he was just not into me and looking for ways to make sure I was not into him...but nope, he kept texting me to go out again. Then there were the guys that asked me for pictures. I met my ex when I was in high school so I was not up on what people do now. I really didn't understand the first time and I told the guy I had pictures of me up. He followed up with a cock pic. This guy was in his 40s! Dear god My favorite was the guy who messaged me and asked if I had herpes. WTF kind of question was that? Do I LOOK like I have herpes??lol I was literally on that website for a month and don't know how people do it long term. I don't know if it is easier for guys. What is it with men sending pictures of their junk on their phone? Am I too old to understand the appeal of that?
One of the managers here got canned a few years back because he sent one of the temps a picture of his junk. The guy was married, with a small baby at home. I don't understand the thinking behind that - or maybe the problem was, there was no thinking. At least, no thinking with the big head.
No, you're not too old. It's just another way of men being disgusting. It's actually sexual assault, though obviously not as serious as many other forms. Forcing women to look at their genitals without consent. (Because if someone did that to you in person, that's flashing, and it's a *crime*.) Either they assume it turns you on, which turns them on, or they know it grosses you out, which makes them feel powerful and turns them on.
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 7, 2019 21:07:31 GMT -5
In any thread like this there are always at least several women who say that they either are not or will not ever try dating again. I think that is a shame. It may be true that there are not a lot of great men out there, but there are some. My GF was with her husband for decades before he died and she grieved for over two years. She then put herself on several dating sites and went out with a number of men. Yes there were some "stories" but there were also some nice men that are now friends. Then she found me and we are very happy, going strong after ten months and looking forward to a long future. So take a chance, but have your eyes open. And your friends are counting on you for those stories! They need a laugh, so don't let them down!
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justme
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Post by justme on Mar 7, 2019 21:26:37 GMT -5
What is it with men sending pictures of their junk on their phone? Am I too old to understand the appeal of that?
One of the managers here got canned a few years back because he sent one of the temps a picture of his junk. The guy was married, with a small baby at home. I don't understand the thinking behind that - or maybe the problem was, there was no thinking. At least, no thinking with the big head.
No, you're not too old. It's just another way of men being disgusting. It's actually sexual assault, though obviously not as serious as many other forms. Forcing women to look at their genitals without consent. (Because if someone did that to you in person, that's flashing, and it's a *crime*.) Either they assume it turns you on, which turns them on, or they know it grosses you out, which makes them feel powerful and turns them on. I've talked to some guys and a few say it's a numbers thing. They send 20 dick pix and get one nude back so they keep doing it. (Not that I disagree with what you said)
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 7, 2019 21:36:24 GMT -5
Dicks are NOT cute! I only want to see them live if I’m about to interact with one - not in a sad ass picture!!!! I forgot where I saw it, but it was a girl remark saying that and that a bulge pic is way more likely to entice a woman. or "the outline", especially prominent in gym shorts.... but I digress. Yes, trolling F-boys is now my entertainment on these dating apps. It took me over a year to get over abrupt end of the thing with HE WHO SHALL NOT BE NAMED, but I've been "back" since October. When I did OLD for the first time a couple of years ago I was all cute and naive to the tricks. Now I'm older, wiser, and less willing to put up with their shit. One guy mentioned something about him thinking I could wear him out only after a few messages. The Younger Me would have been all "LOL, really?" But instead I asked him to explain what exactly he meant by that remark. The backpedaling was real! And of course I unmatched him right after that. A week or so ago this guy on Tinder was going on about how "nice" and "gentlemanly" he was and yet was asking me all these unnecessarily person questions and trying to invite himself to my place. I told him that a real gentleman wouldn't be trying to come to a woman's house he had never met after 9pm on the same day he started talking to her. Then I blocked his number the next day. I actually did meet and hang out with a nice guy, but I have ZERO sexual attraction to him. I told him we couldn't be more than platonic friends, and he was all "you gave me mixed signals." .... bruh, if I wanted you, you'd know! I've been chatting with this one guy for a couple of weeks now. He's smart and funny, we text each other daily, and we've had phone conversations that go on way longer than planned. Due to his custody schedule and other various things at play, we haven't been able to meet face to face yet. I think he's free next weekend and we've talked about what we want to do, but he also might have a prior commitment to help a friend. Hopefully we can meet soon. I would hate for us to have this great emotional chemistry and for the physical attraction not to be there. If he looks mostly like his pictures then I'll be happy, lol! Oh, and he's 27 - oops.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 7, 2019 21:39:29 GMT -5
No, you're not too old. It's just another way of men being disgusting. It's actually sexual assault, though obviously not as serious as many other forms. Forcing women to look at their genitals without consent. (Because if someone did that to you in person, that's flashing, and it's a *crime*.) Either they assume it turns you on, which turns them on, or they know it grosses you out, which makes them feel powerful and turns them on. I've talked to some guys and a few say it's a numbers thing. They send 20 dick pix and get one nude back so they keep doing it. (Not that I disagree with what you said) 1 or 2 of my girlfriends said they like getting them so they know what the guy is working with. Don't get me wrong, I'd like to know too - but I'd be happy with something like: Please circle the response that best describes your penis. a) 0-4" b) 5-8" c) 9"+
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justme
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Post by justme on Mar 7, 2019 21:44:01 GMT -5
I've talked to some guys and a few say it's a numbers thing. They send 20 dick pix and get one nude back so they keep doing it. (Not that I disagree with what you said) 1 or 2 of my girlfriends said they like getting them so they know what the guy is working with. Don't get me wrong, I'd like to know too - but I'd be happy with something like: Please circle the response that best describes your penis. a) 0-4" b) 5-8" c) 9"+
Yea but I don't need to know it before I find out if the dude can actually hold a conversation!
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chapeau
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Post by chapeau on Mar 7, 2019 21:50:25 GMT -5
I've talked to some guys and a few say it's a numbers thing. They send 20 dick pix and get one nude back so they keep doing it. (Not that I disagree with what you said) 1 or 2 of my girlfriends said they like getting them so they know what the guy is working with. Don't get me wrong, I'd like to know too - but I'd be happy with something like: Please circle the response that best describes your penis. a) 0-4" b) 5-8" c) 9"+
I’m also not convinced that most men can read a ruler... DH is always telling me that he has “at least an inch” of new work on the fax machine. Sure, the pile of paper is 8.5 inches wide, 11 inches long, and about 3/8 of an inch tall. That certainly explains an awful lot... 😉😇
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flutterby
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Post by flutterby on Mar 7, 2019 21:51:32 GMT -5
So funny you started this thread. I was just thinking we needed one like it!
I've received so many dick pics I started a folder so my friends can rate them and get a laugh. I'm 45. Why am I mostly getting messages from children (aka early 30's guys)? Find a woman your own age Junior! No, I will not go to Kik to chat.
Here's the issue I'm having:
Met this guy for a drink a couple weeks ago. Nice, but no chemistry. I did the grown-up thing and told him I wasn't interested in going out again. He messages me the other day, and I thought well maybe I wasn't giving him a real chance, so I agreed to go out again. We make out a bit. Nope, no chemistry for sure. How do I tell him I'm not interested? AGAIN?? I should have trusted my instincts the first time.
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MJ2.0
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Post by MJ2.0 on Mar 7, 2019 21:57:37 GMT -5
tell him you've given it another chance and you are 100% sure that you don't feel the chemistry is there. Then wish him well, and promptly block him.
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flutterby
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Post by flutterby on Mar 7, 2019 22:22:42 GMT -5
Yeah, I guess that's a more mature response than just ghosting him. Ugh, fine.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 7, 2019 22:24:11 GMT -5
I really don’t get the sending erotic pics to someone you don’t know, I wouldn’t even want a pic like that to exist of me.
I had very specific criteria when I was looking last year:
Has a professional job Isn’t a financial mess Has my kind of humor Likes my football team and wants to go to every game (this was actually a big one) Very close to my age Wants to go out and have fun No children and is somewhat open to it possibly happening but OK if it doesn’t
All that was not easy to find in my late 30’s and I wasn’t looking for a hookup at all, I’ve had enough of that.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 7, 2019 22:27:07 GMT -5
What is it with men sending pictures of their junk on their phone? Am I too old to understand the appeal of that?
One of the managers here got canned a few years back because he sent one of the temps a picture of his junk. The guy was married, with a small baby at home. I don't understand the thinking behind that - or maybe the problem was, there was no thinking. At least, no thinking with the big head.
No, you're not too old. It's just another way of men being disgusting. It's actually sexual assault, though obviously not as serious as many other forms. Forcing women to look at their genitals without consent. (Because if someone did that to you in person, that's flashing, and it's a *crime*.) Either they assume it turns you on, which turns them on, or they know it grosses you out, which makes them feel powerful and turns them on. To be fair, women also send out nudes but for different reasons. I’ve had several male friends tell me they have received unsolicited nudes from women that is nothing more than a way to get money. So the nastiness doesn’t only lie at the feet of men. Is that also sexual assault?
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 7, 2019 22:33:39 GMT -5
In any thread like this there are always at least several women who say that they either are not or will not ever try dating again. I think that is a shame. It may be true that there are not a lot of great men out there, but there are some. My GF was with her husband for decades before he died and she grieved for over two years. She then put herself on several dating sites and went out with a number of men. Yes there were some "stories" but there were also some nice men that are now friends. Then she found me and we are very happy, going strong after ten months and looking forward to a long future. So take a chance, but have your eyes open. And your friends are counting on you for those stories! They need a laugh, so don't let them down! I think that’s something that women in relationships say. I said it myself but I also didn’t expect to ever be single again. I feel sorry for people that are so hurt by a spouse that they can’t open themselves up to love again.
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weltschmerz
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Post by weltschmerz on Mar 7, 2019 22:52:24 GMT -5
They should have something like The Bachelor, but for seniors. The appeal of the bachelor would be that he can still see to drive at night.
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Pants
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Post by Pants on Mar 7, 2019 22:58:15 GMT -5
No, you're not too old. It's just another way of men being disgusting. It's actually sexual assault, though obviously not as serious as many other forms. Forcing women to look at their genitals without consent. (Because if someone did that to you in person, that's flashing, and it's a *crime*.) Either they assume it turns you on, which turns them on, or they know it grosses you out, which makes them feel powerful and turns them on. To be fair, women also send out nudes but for different reasons. I’ve had several male friends tell me they have received unsolicited nudes from women that is nothing more than a way to get money. So the nastiness doesn’t only lie at the feet of men. Is that also sexual assault? Yes. Why would it not be?
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 7, 2019 23:13:15 GMT -5
To be fair, women also send out nudes but for different reasons. I’ve had several male friends tell me they have received unsolicited nudes from women that is nothing more than a way to get money. So the nastiness doesn’t only lie at the feet of men. Is that also sexual assault? Yes. Why would it not be? I do not think receiving a picture is sexual assault, regardless of who does the sending. It speaks to the mentality of the sender but I never felt assaulted. I laughed over a grown ass man being so pathetic but a picture does not violate me.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Mar 8, 2019 0:01:24 GMT -5
In any thread like this there are always at least several women who say that they either are not or will not ever try dating again. I think that is a shame. It may be true that there are not a lot of great men out there, but there are some. My GF was with her husband for decades before he died and she grieved for over two years. She then put herself on several dating sites and went out with a number of men. Yes there were some "stories" but there were also some nice men that are now friends. Then she found me and we are very happy, going strong after ten months and looking forward to a long future. So take a chance, but have your eyes open. And your friends are counting on you for those stories! They need a laugh, so don't let them down! This assumes so much. My choices and wants have nothing to do with whether or not I think good men are out there.
I don't think that it's a shame that I can play particular pieces of music in an orchestral setting and have it be better than toe-curling nookie. Playing an instrument in a group, no matter what the size...requires trust, risk, vulnerability, communication, bonding, etc. And that's enough for me..to get those needs met playing in a group vs. being in a relationship with someone. I'm nurturing 5 nuclear relationships now. I'm looking to downsize, eventually, not be able need two hands to count my significant relationships.
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giramomma
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Post by giramomma on Mar 8, 2019 0:10:17 GMT -5
I think that’s something that women in relationships say. I said it myself but I also didn’t expect to ever be single again. I feel sorry for people that are so hurt by a spouse that they can’t open themselves up to love again. Why assume you can only experience love in an exclusive marriage-like relationship? I have had friends that I've loved. I've had some of my old students that I've loved like my own kids. There's a few special coworkers that definitely have loved me..and I love them (one is one of my kids' godmothers). There's the love that comes from engaging in my hobbies that make me happy. I'm actually pretty grateful at the amount of love I have in my life...and I find it to be quite enough....I'm not compelled to seek out more.
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 8, 2019 0:22:49 GMT -5
In any thread like this there are always at least several women who say that they either are not or will not ever try dating again. I think that is a shame. It may be true that there are not a lot of great men out there, but there are some. My GF was with her husband for decades before he died and she grieved for over two years. She then put herself on several dating sites and went out with a number of men. Yes there were some "stories" but there were also some nice men that are now friends. Then she found me and we are very happy, going strong after ten months and looking forward to a long future. So take a chance, but have your eyes open. And your friends are counting on you for those stories! They need a laugh, so don't let them down! This assumes so much. My choices and wants have nothing to do with whether or not I think good men are out there.
I don't think that it's a shame that I can play particular pieces of music in an orchestral setting and have it be better than toe-curling nookie. Playing an instrument in a group, no matter what the size...requires trust, risk, vulnerability, communication, bonding, etc. And that's enough for me..to get those needs met playing in a group vs. being in a relationship with someone. I'm nurturing 5 nuclear relationships now. I'm looking to downsize, eventually, not be able need two hands to count my significant relationships.
If you think playing music is better than sex, you have been having some pretty shitty sex!
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 8, 2019 0:34:51 GMT -5
In any thread like this there are always at least several women who say that they either are not or will not ever try dating again. I think that is a shame. It may be true that there are not a lot of great men out there, but there are some. My GF was with her husband for decades before he died and she grieved for over two years. She then put herself on several dating sites and went out with a number of men. Yes there were some "stories" but there were also some nice men that are now friends. Then she found me and we are very happy, going strong after ten months and looking forward to a long future. So take a chance, but have your eyes open. And your friends are counting on you for those stories! They need a laugh, so don't let them down! This assumes so much. My choices and wants have nothing to do with whether or not I think good men are out there.
I don't think that it's a shame that I can play particular pieces of music in an orchestral setting and have it be better than toe-curling nookie. Playing an instrument in a group, no matter what the size...requires trust, risk, vulnerability, communication, bonding, etc. And that's enough for me..to get those needs met playing in a group vs. being in a relationship with someone. I'm nurturing 5 nuclear relationships now. I'm looking to downsize, eventually, not be able need two hands to count my significant relationships. "The lady doth protest too much, methinks." If you are happy being by yourself, great. If you have so full a life that you don't want to try and fit another person (a man) into it and indeed seek to cut people out, more power to you. It obviously doesn't apply to you. It is a generalization, but I'd bet the vast majority of women who DO say something like that WOULD want to find someone for at least companionship if not love if they either thought they could or were willing to put up with the perceived hassles of doing so. It is most likely the horror stories of dating that turn them off. For the record, I said nothing about "toe-curling nookie" nor did I imply it. Why did it occur to you to equate that with what I wrote?
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tallguy
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Post by tallguy on Mar 8, 2019 0:36:44 GMT -5
This assumes so much. My choices and wants have nothing to do with whether or not I think good men are out there.
I don't think that it's a shame that I can play particular pieces of music in an orchestral setting and have it be better than toe-curling nookie. Playing an instrument in a group, no matter what the size...requires trust, risk, vulnerability, communication, bonding, etc. And that's enough for me..to get those needs met playing in a group vs. being in a relationship with someone. I'm nurturing 5 nuclear relationships now. I'm looking to downsize, eventually, not be able need two hands to count my significant relationships.
If you think playing music is better than sex, you haven’t been having some pretty shitty sex! I think you meant HAVE been having....
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Miss Tequila
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Post by Miss Tequila on Mar 8, 2019 0:41:20 GMT -5
If you think playing music is better than sex, you haven’t been having some pretty shitty sex! I think you meant HAVE been having.... Hahaha!! Yes, I did. I’m on my phone and can’t proof as good on this.
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