wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 6, 2017 10:42:56 GMT -5
George Washington never told a lie.....but then he never had to file a FORM 1040.........
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Deleted
Joined: Apr 18, 2024 4:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Apr 6, 2017 10:48:07 GMT -5
Know why the old lady fell down that well? Because she couldn't see that well.
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Deleted
Joined: Apr 18, 2024 4:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Apr 6, 2017 10:49:36 GMT -5
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
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Deleted
Joined: Apr 18, 2024 4:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Apr 6, 2017 10:51:36 GMT -5
A thief broke into my house last.. He started searching for money so I woke up and started searching with him.
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 7, 2017 11:08:03 GMT -5
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and said, "I'm sorry. We did everything that we could. But....he pulled through.....
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tigerpause
Junior Associate
Joined: Aug 15, 2011 22:35:11 GMT -5
Posts: 6,356
Mini-Profile Background: https://i.imgur.com/RZ8b5SP.png
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Post by tigerpause on Apr 8, 2017 3:51:29 GMT -5
As soon as the hospital made me put on one of those little gowns, I knew the end was in sight.
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 10, 2017 10:51:29 GMT -5
Breaking News! Epidemic overrunning the country......Americans are now in a daze from "intaxication"
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 14, 2017 10:57:49 GMT -5
What is the difference between a healthy bunny and an odd bunny?...........Well, one is a "fit" bunny, and the other is a bit funny......
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 14, 2017 11:08:58 GMT -5
Where does Dracula keep his Easter Candy? .....In his Easter Casket
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 17, 2017 12:32:06 GMT -5
How much room is needed for a fungi to grow?..............As mushroom as possible!
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on Apr 17, 2017 12:42:58 GMT -5
Why don't cannibals like to eat clowns?
......because they taste funny
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on Apr 17, 2017 19:09:44 GMT -5
What is a mummy's favorite music?
......Wrap!
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on Apr 17, 2017 19:12:34 GMT -5
What computer sings the best?
.......A Dell
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sesfw
Junior Associate
Today is the first day of the rest of my life
Joined: Dec 21, 2010 15:45:17 GMT -5
Posts: 6,268
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Post by sesfw on Apr 17, 2017 19:32:03 GMT -5
What does a snail say when it's riding on a turtle?
Wheeeeeee
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 18, 2017 11:26:10 GMT -5
Can February March? .....No, but April May!
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 20, 2017 10:57:11 GMT -5
Have you heard about the new restaurant on the moon? The food IS amazing but they say the place has no atmosphere..........
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 21, 2017 10:32:45 GMT -5
Since light travels faster than sound, would that explain why some people appear bright.....until you year them speak?
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tigerpause
Junior Associate
Joined: Aug 15, 2011 22:35:11 GMT -5
Posts: 6,356
Mini-Profile Background: https://i.imgur.com/RZ8b5SP.png
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Post by tigerpause on Apr 22, 2017 16:39:20 GMT -5
Knock Knock
Who's there
Dishes
Dishes who
Dishes a bad joke
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 24, 2017 10:44:42 GMT -5
How do you slaughter a vegan vampire?........with a steak through the heart.....
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on Apr 25, 2017 10:56:06 GMT -5
These days, about half the stuff in my shopping cart says; "For fast relief."
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NoNamePerson
Distinguished Associate
Is There Anybody OUT There?
Joined: Dec 17, 2010 17:03:17 GMT -5
Posts: 25,646
Location: WITNESS PROTECTION
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Post by NoNamePerson on Apr 25, 2017 13:13:48 GMT -5
Where do library books like to sleep?
Under the covers!
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on Apr 26, 2017 12:29:34 GMT -5
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear
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Deleted
Joined: Apr 18, 2024 4:28:25 GMT -5
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2017 23:18:40 GMT -5
Two guys sitting on a bench...
Guy 1: Did you hear about the lawyer who only wears 100% wool suits?
Guy 2: Yeah, he's a wolf in sheep's clothing.
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on May 1, 2017 13:09:47 GMT -5
Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes :-)
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on May 3, 2017 10:23:53 GMT -5
What's the difference between Chuck Schumer And a prostitute?............The prostitute provides value for the money she takes.
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on May 3, 2017 10:37:19 GMT -5
Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?
They are full of spirit
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wyouser
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 16:35:20 GMT -5
Posts: 12,126
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Post by wyouser on May 4, 2017 10:57:06 GMT -5
The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well together , is because they have a "common enemy".....................
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Rob Base 2.0
Well-Known Member
Joined: Feb 23, 2017 18:12:07 GMT -5
Posts: 1,538
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Post by Rob Base 2.0 on May 4, 2017 11:30:46 GMT -5
What do you call a man that has lost all of his intellect?
Widow
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tigerpause
Junior Associate
Joined: Aug 15, 2011 22:35:11 GMT -5
Posts: 6,356
Mini-Profile Background: https://i.imgur.com/RZ8b5SP.png
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Post by tigerpause on May 4, 2017 16:04:04 GMT -5
What kind of car does Jesus drive? A Christler
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obelisk
Familiar Member
Joined: Nov 12, 2014 14:49:16 GMT -5
Posts: 555
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Post by obelisk on May 4, 2017 21:16:56 GMT -5
A cowboy goes to the ranch on Saturday and leaves on Friday how is that possible?
His horse is named Friday.
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