Works4me
Senior Member
Someone responded to your personal ad - a German Shepherd named Tara wants to have you for dinner...
Joined: May 5, 2012 12:11:37 GMT -5
Posts: 2,522
|
Post by Works4me on May 22, 2016 2:35:53 GMT -5
Career medical social worker - that man is not appropriate for that facility and for the benefit of everyone he needs to be moved elsewhere. Licensing could and probably would cite them if this occurred during an inspection. His most recent behavior shows that he is well aware that what he is doing is unacceptable and that he is able to control himself. See that he is removed from there if he continues to expire hims of. Belittlement of his organ is amusing and failure to respond is a very good reaction but flashing of staff is entirely different than fellow residents. The main issue with allowing it to continue unabated is the risk to the facility. It will serve the best interests of no one if his behavior penalizes and/or even threatens the continued existence off the facility. &
|
|
zibazinski
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 16:12:50 GMT -5
Posts: 47,861
|
Post by zibazinski on May 22, 2016 6:03:06 GMT -5
The old guy knows it's wrong but might forget soon enough. If he was mentally well, he wouldn't be there. Hopefully they find him another place or they can just avoid each other as much as possible. With all the people around I can't imagine any real opportunity to just flash her without involving others. Not with the supervision she and the rest should be receiving.
|
|
plugginaway22
Well-Known Member
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 10:18:42 GMT -5
Posts: 1,655
|
Post by plugginaway22 on May 22, 2016 9:18:14 GMT -5
This is so sad, but whenever we visited my Grandma in the nursing home (back in the 90s) there was a guy named Marlin who just kept pulling his pants down. The staff, residents, visitors, we were all used to seeing him. The nurses would just go over and pull his pants up, so not sure if he actually understood he was flashing people. My kids were the ones who were probably scarred by hit, we all still refer to Marlin.
|
|
zibazinski
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 16:12:50 GMT -5
Posts: 47,861
|
Post by zibazinski on May 22, 2016 9:25:16 GMT -5
I think the guy avoids you because he understands you don't like him, just not necessarily why.
|
|
Tennesseer
Member Emeritus
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 21:58:42 GMT -5
Posts: 63,325
|
Post by Tennesseer on May 22, 2016 10:12:15 GMT -5
This is so sad, but whenever we visited my Grandma in the nursing home (back in the 90s) there was a guy named Marlin who just kept pulling his pants down. The staff, residents, visitors, we were all used to seeing him. The nurses would just go over and pull his pants up, so not sure if he actually understood he was flashing people. My kids were the ones who were probably scarred by hit, we all still refer to Marlin. Often times, these folks have the mental capacity of an infant or young child where running around without part or all of one's clothes is not even thought of as being wrong by the individual. We laugh when little kids do it in their innocence but it's not so funny when it is adults do it. I don't know if this is the case in Pat's situation but it could be.
|
|
Opti
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 10:45:38 GMT -5
Posts: 39,675
Location: New Jersey
Mini-Profile Name Color: c28523
Mini-Profile Text Color: 990033
|
Post by Opti on May 24, 2016 8:57:25 GMT -5
When I worked my 8 to 12 weeks helping out as a Rehab Aide tech I was told to spend time assessing if a patient had their fly closed, pants up, was wearing underwear or diapers. It is very common in the subacute to have people whose pants fall down too much or men who forget to put their fly up. These are people usually recent from surgery or in decline so they are often changing weights and sometimes confused. Temporary or more permanent.
And honestly I encounter it often enough as a simple receptionist. I delivered some patient mail at the end of my shift since I knew it wouldn't get there for a couple days if I didn't do it. I knocked on the outside of the door to the room. And no surprise, just after 8PM, both male patients were lying in bed with only their tighty whiteys on below the waist. I figure I got lucky since occasionally you have one who likes being naked below the waist.
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,107
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on May 24, 2016 20:56:33 GMT -5
I'm sure my 92 year old dad still sleeps in his underwear. He always has. While he is in independent living, the staff did have to come wake him last summer as he can't hear the phone without his hearing aids. He said they dressed him. I did ask about it and they said he wasn't putting his jeans on fast enough and the tornado sirens were going. They didn't even give him or another woman time to put their hearing aids in!
|
|
Opti
Community Leader
Joined: Dec 18, 2010 10:45:38 GMT -5
Posts: 39,675
Location: New Jersey
Mini-Profile Name Color: c28523
Mini-Profile Text Color: 990033
|
Post by Opti on May 24, 2016 22:10:37 GMT -5
I'm sure my 92 year old dad still sleeps in his underwear. He always has. While he is in independent living, the staff did have to come wake him last summer as he can't hear the phone without his hearing aids. He said they dressed him. I did ask about it and they said he wasn't putting his jeans on fast enough and the tornado sirens were going. They didn't even give him or another woman time to put their hearing aids in! When a tornado comes to smash a building down on you, I don't think it waits until you are dressed or having your hearing aids in either. Sometimes speed is important.
I hope your Dad is doing well.
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,107
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on May 25, 2016 20:54:38 GMT -5
I totally understood that speed was important and I know how slow he is. I did the same thing to him the night mom passed away because he was going to bed and we were all yelling at him that she was dying NOW.
He was more upset about his hearing aids and apparently the other lady was also.
Dad is doing well for a 92 year old man, but he is still grieving deeply. Of course, he had absolutely no idea mom was dying.
|
|
Blonde Granny
Junior Associate
Joined: Jan 15, 2013 8:27:13 GMT -5
Posts: 6,919
Today's Mood: Alone in the world
Location: Wandering Aimlessly
Mini-Profile Name Color: 28e619
Mini-Profile Text Color: 3a9900
|
Post by Blonde Granny on Jun 8, 2016 16:16:14 GMT -5
Pat, probably best to let it eventually end up in the hands of MediCAID. My Mom is on a Medicaid Waiver program from the state of Nebraska. This program allows the state to pay for assisted living facility. She has been there for 4 years now. The state allows her to keep $60 per month out of her SS check, and she also has to pay for her cost of MediCARE and her supplement each month. This is the program for only assisted living facilities and if she ends up in a nursing home (she's 96 now) then she will transfer over into the state Medicaid regular program.
Check it out, contact the HHS dept of the state of Indiana and ask if they have one. There is no reason you have to pay anything, it's her issue, not the issue of adult children to pay these costs.
|
|
tama
New Member
Joined: Aug 25, 2015 19:27:03 GMT -5
Posts: 28
|
Post by tama on Jun 8, 2016 16:46:47 GMT -5
You'd be surprised how many states have laws on the books regarding the responsibility of children to pay for their parents' care. Filial responsibility and all that.
|
|
Blonde Granny
Junior Associate
Joined: Jan 15, 2013 8:27:13 GMT -5
Posts: 6,919
Today's Mood: Alone in the world
Location: Wandering Aimlessly
Mini-Profile Name Color: 28e619
Mini-Profile Text Color: 3a9900
|
Post by Blonde Granny on Jun 8, 2016 17:14:44 GMT -5
I've read some about that tame, and at times some states are trying something called a clawback of money paid. Some adult children have been hit with $100sK of costs that the state believes should be paid back. Normally the state chooses the child they believe has the most money and is most likely to have the funds to pay it back.
As for me, I think it's shameful!
|
|
Peace77
Senior Member
Joined: Dec 29, 2010 1:42:40 GMT -5
Posts: 3,917
|
Post by Peace77 on Jun 8, 2016 23:36:00 GMT -5
What about selling MIL's home to pay for her care?
Or, was it sold already?
|
|
TheOtherMe
Distinguished Associate
Joined: Dec 24, 2010 14:40:52 GMT -5
Posts: 27,107
Mini-Profile Name Color: e619e6
|
Post by TheOtherMe on Jun 9, 2016 19:57:47 GMT -5
In Iowa, my clients in nursing homes are allowed to keep $50 per month. However, since they get "extra help" on prescription drug premiums and co-pays, they don't have much need for that money. Most of my clients don't get their hair done very often.
Here, they can clawback for 5 years. Dad has now reached the point where the money he and mom gave us can not be gone after. However, the car they gave my nephew is another story. Will let my sister, the executor, deal with that if it comes to that.
|
|