GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
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"How you win matters." Ender, Ender's Game
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:33:09 GMT -5
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Oct 4, 2014 22:21:49 GMT -5
-hug-to you all!! What a kind bunch of creepy Internet strangers you all are.
DS is 16 and allergic only to tree nuts (not peanuts, which are legumes) yet the advice for younger kids and peanut allergies is sincerely appreciated and I will use what I can in my case. His concern is mostly about the physics behind flight, the food allergy threat, and the concern about evil-doers in-flight.
I agree that knowing how to navigate an airport and fly from place to place is a life skill, but it is a uniquely challenging skill to master. In my son's defense, he is usually spot-on about which situations are genuinely manageable and which ones will end up being a clusterf***. I know that my job as a parent is to push my kids out of the nest with the skills they need to live independent, productive lives, but I firmly believe that each child brings his/her own timetable to the situation. We discuss taking a trip involving flights on a regular basis at home, so I haven't ignored the topic. But, I also know I need to really listen to my kids.
I did look into Amtrak, but that is a 24 hour trip for us according to my research. At that point, I'd rather drive for 16 hours.
As for in-flight snacks, Jet Blue seems to offer a snack pack with tree nuts in it. Has anyone flown Jet Blue recently and witnessed how prevalent tree nuts are on the flights?
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Apple
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Always travel with a sense of humor
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Post by Apple on Oct 4, 2014 23:48:19 GMT -5
Hmmm... my quote option disappeared...
"His concern is mostly about the physics behind flight, the food allergy threat, and the concern about evil-doers in-flight."
The two in bold are the two things my son worries about. He was three years old when 9/11 happened and his babysitter played the news non-stop in the living room where they played. Before that he was excited about planes, but after watching planes crash every few minutes for days on end, it created a deep fear. I'm still ticked at the old babysitter for that (even though she was otherwise great).
He also refers to planes as "big chunks of metal that hurl through the sky", or something like that.
Each time we flew I had this fear that this may be the time he gets out of control (he did that once before eye surgery, poor kid was scared out of his mind). But, the big thing for me was knowing that he was looking forward to the trip, so he wanted to work through that fear.
Good luck, and hope once he does it he decides he likes it.
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ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ
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Post by ՏՇԾԵԵʅՏɧ_LԹՏՏʅҼ on Oct 5, 2014 0:03:43 GMT -5
For anxiety or flying, I always took a 1/2 tablet of 1 mg Ativan. I still use it oaccasionally for panic attacks/uncomfortable situations.
It doesn't make you "spaced-out" but allows your system/brain to cope with what you have to face - such as flying.
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Tiny
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Post by Tiny on Oct 5, 2014 0:16:33 GMT -5
Ugg. I can't offer help with the allergy - but you can bring your own food - you may need to fill up a bottle of water OR buy bottled drinks after you get thru security. I'd suggest having your DS think about stuff he'd like to do on the plane as a distraction... watch a movie on his Electronic Distraction? Read a book? Do crosswords/wordsearch games? I'd also come up with distractions for while you're waiting before the flight. I've flown with a basket case semi neurotic person and if your son is as bad as she is I'd suggest a heavy sedative. Basket Case person whipped herself up into total fear and anxiety 3 DAYS before the trip. By the day of the trip she hadn't slept in over 24 hours and was terrified... If your son is gonna get that upset about the trip days before hand - I'd recommend a heavy sedative... This may be a good time for your DS to practice some calming/distracting excercises - I'm sure there will be other times in his life when he's got to do something that causes anxiety and having some reliable coping skills is priceless. I've developed 'vertigo' cause the last few times I've flown, I've gotten dizzy/nauseated from looking out the window during take off and landing (the change in height coupled with the tilting of the plane). I've stopped sitting in the window seat and have found the aisle seat more comfortable.
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Tiny
Senior Associate
Joined: Dec 29, 2010 21:22:34 GMT -5
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Post by Tiny on Oct 5, 2014 0:20:46 GMT -5
IDK, I'm gonna add maybe it's a good time to discuss/think about one's mortality? How they are living their live/expectations, etc... I have a very morbid family - so, while I'm not looking forward to death, I'm not all that terrified of it (like my basket case/neurotic friend).
I've found some comfort in the idea that I'm OK with my death... it lets me deal with the other layers of anxiety without going thru a lot of effort to keep myself for acknowledging that, yes, one day I will die.
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GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl
Senior Associate
"How you win matters." Ender, Ender's Game
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:33:09 GMT -5
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Post by GRG a/k/a goldenrulegirl on Oct 5, 2014 12:41:19 GMT -5
Tiny, thanks for the advice. We do talk about mortality, but in a back door way -- we have raised him to accept that he has life-threatening food allergies, but that he can't let the food allergies define him. We have taught him time and time again how to move through the larger world despite, or perhaps, in spite of, his food allergies. He actually has some good coping skills and strategies which he can independently employ as he deems necessary. The difference with flying, however, is that there really isn't an "exit door" for him to leave if he doesn't feel comfortable with the food choices around him. I will admit we may not have sufficiently discussed the more likely causes of death -- illness, accidents, evil-doers, etc. -- because there is a delicate balance between those types of conversations and helping kids develop and maintain an optimistic, adventurous approach to living life fully. Without detouring down a different path with this thread, I will add that having life-threatening allergies is akin to having a life-threatening, chronic, illness (i.e., diabetes, heart disease, etc.). One must always monitor one's well-being carefully and have life-saving medications at the ready. Our family has been fortunate enough to connect with some food allergy groups that hold fabulous conferences for teenagers to help the kids with the psycho-social impact of food allergies. Because life is just chock full of irony, our trip to Chicago is for one of these very conferences, LOL.
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