countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jul 13, 2018 1:01:15 GMT -5
She has dementia, there are quite a few there. She is staying pretty much stable, she is there because she can't remember things. Her sister was extremely paranoid, they finally got her on meds for that, they both have dementia. Yes, hubs, worries, they, their brothers 2, grandma and maybe great grandma had it. Until they get where they can't manage at all they let them stay. You cannot get out without a code, we had to move her from another facility as she could get out. There is staff, she and her sister are both there. This is the closest and its affordable. They are very good to the clients. Her next step will be a locked alzenheimers unit, not sure where she will go after this. Her SS and VA funds pay for this, when she goes to the next level, it will be on Medicaid. Those run $6000 a month and up, we can't pay something like that. It's clean, good food. Lots pass through there, by they time they go there they are in bad shape and many move on quickly to a nursing home. I think a lot of hers was very poor nutrition, I tried taking her food and she didn't eat it, when she still lived in her house. I think she lived on $1 pizzas and ice cream for a long time. Hubs takes her ensure and they make sure she has it a couple of times a day. We can tell a big difference when she doesn't drink it, she eats no breakfast so she was not eating from 4ish to 11 the next day, does not work for her.. She could afford to eat she just wanted to eat that, she and her sister think gourmet dining is McDonalds
I have to rewrite all her VA filing. I had backup, it all balanced, they sent a letter denying her report I sent in. I was reading through it looking for the reason. It said I did not initial the back page and they are making me redo it all. I can't even find where I am supposed to initial, I will have to keep looking till I do.
Night all!
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Post by Deleted on Jul 24, 2018 21:46:42 GMT -5
It was a long day at the clinic, and we get to go back tomorrow.
First up was a visit to the cardiologist that takes care of his pacemaker/defibrillator. His other cardiologist tried to do a heart cath and failed last week as a preliminary to his heart valve replacement in August. He has two blockages that they cannot get to. But they discovered he had afib when doing one of his stress tests. (They also discovered a nodule on his lung and a cyst on his kidney as part of the CT scan; we are also taking care of those.) So Cardiologist B and the valve clinic referred him back to Cardiologist A for the afib. Unfortunately, Cardiologist A wants to put him on a high power blood thinner to prevent a stroke, but he had an upper GI bleed three weeks ago. So that is a no go. He wished us "good luck" instead of "good-bye," and I jokingly called him out on that. He said, "I don't want to underplay this. This and his other health problem are really serious." We know.
Then we went to the valve clinic where Cardiologist B works and talked to the head of the clinic about the procedure.
Tomorrow we do the bloodwork with the anesthesiologist for the heart valve. We also meet with the urologist about the kidney cyst. We have already met with the pulmonary doctor who said the nodules were too small to even biopsy. We are to consider them benign until he tells us they aren't and come back in six months.
We are very lucky to have good insurance (and Medicare as a backup) and to live in a city with a major research/medical center that specializes in heart issues. But it is still a tough situation. He has been hospitalized twice this summer and will have a third one in August.
I will say that Cardiologist A is the first one that took me seriously when I told him DH has significant memory problems. Everyone else has brushed it off as normal aging. That's a factor, but I don't think it explains everything.
Thanks for letting me vent. The good thing is that DH has a positive attitude through all this. It makes all the difference in the world.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 25, 2018 6:05:07 GMT -5
It was a long day at the clinic, and we get to go back tomorrow. First up was a visit to the cardiologist that takes care of his pacemaker/defibrillator. His other cardiologist tried to do a heart cath and failed last week as a preliminary to his heart valve replacement in August. He has two blockages that they cannot get to. But they discovered he had afib when doing one of his stress tests. (They also discovered a nodule on his lung and a cyst on his kidney as part of the CT scan; we are also taking care of those.) So Cardiologist B and the valve clinic referred him back to Cardiologist A for the afib. Unfortunately, Cardiologist A wants to put him on a high power blood thinner to prevent a stroke, but he had an upper GI bleed three weeks ago. So that is a no go. He wished us "good luck" instead of "good-bye," and I jokingly called him out on that. He said, "I don't want to underplay this. This and his other health problem are really serious." We know. Then we went to the valve clinic where Cardiologist B works and talked to the head of the clinic about the procedure. Tomorrow we do the bloodwork with the anesthesiologist for the heart valve. We also meet with the urologist about the kidney cyst. We have already met with the pulmonary doctor who said the nodules were too small to even biopsy. We are to consider them benign until he tells us they aren't and come back in six months. We are very lucky to have good insurance (and Medicare as a backup) and to live in a city with a major research/medical center that specializes in heart issues. But it is still a tough situation. He has been hospitalized twice this summer and will have a third one in August. I will say that Cardiologist A is the first one that took me seriously when I told him DH has significant memory problems. Everyone else has brushed it off as normal aging. That's a factor, but I don't think it explains everything. Thanks for letting me vent. The good thing is that DH has a positive attitude through all this. It makes all the difference in the world. Virtual hugs 🤗
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jul 29, 2018 8:11:43 GMT -5
I'm so sorry that is tough, hope you can get all this resolved.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Jul 29, 2018 8:13:43 GMT -5
Having some chest pain, took 2 aspirin, that should stop it. Have my GP appointment tomorrow, can't get into my cardiologist, he is gone a lot so trying to move to another heart doctor. Haven't seen him for 2 months, bad living in a rural area with few specialists.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Jul 29, 2018 11:03:37 GMT -5
Stress over your visit is probably the cause.
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Jul 29, 2018 15:33:46 GMT -5
As usual, Sunday School followed by church service then out to lunch. 9 of us ladies enjoyed BBQ and some opted for the peach cobbler for dessert. We enjoy the time we can spend together and I look forward to it each week.
Came home and update YNAB for August, then took a 1 hour nap. Now sipping a cup of coffee before I fix lunch for tomorrow.
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Post by Deleted on Jul 29, 2018 16:23:16 GMT -5
I made 2 batches of soap. 1 to go and resting after doing soap dishes twice. Cleaned the bathroom and made sure dh did not kill himself on the ladder.
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Artemis Windsong
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Post by Artemis Windsong on Jul 29, 2018 18:49:07 GMT -5
Signed up on myfitnesspal to track my food. I don't like all this tracking but I'm not making progress. I also need to measure. The site doesn't give calories burned for weight lifting. As suggested, I tried to put it in under cardio and the site couldn't find the exercise. I went to a one hour play of The Two Gentlemen of Verona. It was good.
My GrS1 and his GF were at my house when I got home. Drove through very heavy rain. My GrGrS's new house is haunted. A toy car rolled across the room and a fragrance diffuser was thrown off the wall. He's not afraid and his sleep is not disturbed.
Another weird thing. We sold our mountain property early July. There have been several rattle snakes sighted or killed since then in several different places. In 30 or more years, no one had seen a rattler. H. suggested the residents carry a hoe instead of a gun when out walking. Scary high grass.
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catsareme
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Post by catsareme on Aug 21, 2018 10:00:45 GMT -5
Having annual maintenance done on all major household systems (septic, back-up generator, chimneys cleaned, etc.) The peace-of-mind, and hopefully avoiding an ill-timed major repair, make the $$ spent worth it.
We had 3 cords of firewood delivered for use in the woodstoves. The leaves have already started to turn color; I wonder if it's going to be a hard winter.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Aug 25, 2018 11:23:51 GMT -5
I am making spaghetti sauce to can. I have one more half bucket of small tomatoes, I hate fixing them but they have the most flavor.
I have put in onions, bell peppers, celery, fresh oregano and basil, parsley, canned chilis, 4 cans of tomato paste, red pepper, salt, sugar, going to add brown sugar, added some Worcestershire. It is smelling so good, even hubs thought so. I think I'm going to get more then 7 quarts, we shall see. Ok, back to blanching the little maters!
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vetswife
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Post by vetswife on Sept 18, 2018 10:45:00 GMT -5
Our lives have changed a bit. DH is on hospice care but is feeling pretty well overall since he's gotten the chemo out of his system. I am thankful for the hospice services, everything comes to the house although he is still able to get out and go places. After we got used to the idea life is going on pretty much as normal right now. We've had lots of company and are just enjoying the present.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Sept 18, 2018 10:46:53 GMT -5
Our lives have changed a bit. DH is on hospice care but is feeling pretty well overall since he's gotten the chemo out of his system. I am thankful for the hospice services, everything comes to the house although he is still able to get out and go places. After we got used to the idea life is going on pretty much as normal right now. We've had lots of company and are just enjoying the present.
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TheOtherMe
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Post by TheOtherMe on Sept 18, 2018 11:07:16 GMT -5
Our lives have changed a bit. DH is on hospice care but is feeling pretty well overall since he's gotten the chemo out of his system. I am thankful for the hospice services, everything comes to the house although he is still able to get out and go places. After we got used to the idea life is going on pretty much as normal right now. We've had lots of company and are just enjoying the present. We found hospice to be so kind and caring when mom was at that stage of her life. Make some memories now. My only regret is that we didn't take some pictures of various people visiting and holding mom's hand while they talked to her.
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NoNamePerson
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Post by NoNamePerson on Sept 18, 2018 11:08:33 GMT -5
Our lives have changed a bit. DH is on hospice care but is feeling pretty well overall since he's gotten the chemo out of his system. I am thankful for the hospice services, everything comes to the house although he is still able to get out and go places. After we got used to the idea life is going on pretty much as normal right now. We've had lots of company and are just enjoying the present.
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Sept 18, 2018 11:27:34 GMT -5
Hospice nurses can be amazing. You have to be a special person to do that job, IMO.
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catsareme
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Post by catsareme on Sept 19, 2018 8:26:41 GMT -5
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Blonde Granny
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Post by Blonde Granny on Sept 19, 2018 13:51:40 GMT -5
Worked at the VA today, the cleaning ladies are here (YEA). My Alexa that I ordered from QVC was here yesterday and I got it hooked up today. Gee, someone in my house to actually talk to.
Choir practice at 3:30 then dinner after.
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zibazinski
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Post by zibazinski on Sept 19, 2018 19:30:45 GMT -5
Let us know how that works. I can’t decide if it’s cool or creepy.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Sept 24, 2018 23:21:03 GMT -5
I am getting more and more aggravated at hubs. His mom is making him feel guilty I know. She wants to go home, hear this all the time. He tells her she can't but then I know it bothers him. Therefore he visits, I don't even ask how often anymore, he is always running to town so probably everyother day. I'm not. 1 or 2 days a week would get it as she doesn't know he is there anyway and calls and accuses him of never coming to see her. Sometimes they call late at night and she is mad and threatening to pull her hair out and tear off her clothes. We got her started on Zoloft going to see how that works, doc said it would take from 2 to 3 weeks.
I also said we need to be considering places she can go once she can't stay there, he refuses to talk about it. There aren't many around and I think we need to look at what is suitable and see what we need to do. I sure can't care for her and am not.
So this weekend he takes her out to lunch, ok no issue. I think well we can do something Sunday, no he is taking his mom and aunt to the festival, turned out it was over. I'm not going, I can't take the over and over repeating of stuff. He takes her by to see her only other granddaughter, she lives down the street from the facility and does not go see her, her daughter works at the facility she is in and does not go see her. I don't blame them, same deal as my kids. But hubs thinks everyone wants to interact with her I guess. I said you know I wouldn't mind you taking DD and I someplace, well you can come with me. Well no, I want just the 2 or 3 of us to go. We never eat out anymore, we never go anyplace. I'm so tired of this.
DD doesn't want to go a lot of times, she says dad and I need alone time, yeah right. He had talked about going back to work for awhile but didn't follow up, I don't think anyone would hire him but his old company and he didn't want to go back there. He said they would make him a supervisor and he didn't want to do it, just run equipment for a few weeks.
I suppose he is bored, I sure as hell am. Just not good.
And now visiting son and DIL is really not an option. Son pm's me most weekends and we talk some, sends pictures of little guy. He said they are thinking of coming Thanksgiving, I told him it is a problem of us coming there for obvious reasons but also hubs will want to bring his mom and aunt here for me to fix dinner for. He wants me to do that now and sometimes I can hardly walk to fix our dinner. I never know if I can walk good the next day, I am so dreading Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. I will have to work myself to death. Guess for a couple of days before will take 2 doses of meds to try and build up so I can handle it. Foot has been really bad this week.
DIL sent a video this evening of little guy throwing a plastic hammer and hitting his dad in the face and thought it was funny. I couldn't believe that. I said I'm sorry but that isn't very nice, then he was trying to do the same to her. Well, this is BS, I just plainly told her, he is not hitting me in the face with something like that. Oh my god, if they are letting him do stuff like that and she was laughing like crazy they are setting him up for problems. I saw son took it away from him. I don't need to see things like that, what is she thinking? Son did take it away from him, should have swatted his butt and stopped that right now.
And hubs is mad because he said the foot doctor was going to operate and I said no! What, I was sitting there and what I heard is he didn't want to but could but said 3 or more months to recover, results wouldn't be very good etc. And then just wanted to use a brace. How did we hear so different, now he says just take the motorhome and go wherever you need to go to have something done. I said with surgery like that I couldn't even get in and out, I will need help. He said you can get in and out, it has 3 very steep steps to get in and out, that is crazy. And I couldn't drive it home, I would be stuck. Wow, lot of compassion there.
We had a reoccurring expense on the credit card for some insurance plan. I called the number and found out, started 3 months ago. I said we never took that we have medicare, drug, and supplement, it was $24 something a month. She said we have it all recorded if you need to hear it. I said yes I do, but I want it cancelled she did. I listened to the recording and it was hubs voice or sounded like his, agreeing to all of it, giving our credit card number and agreeing when they said what he was taking. Say what? He said they likely just had it voiced over or something to make it like that, that he never agreed to something like that. I know he wouldn't, so what happened? I said it told you what you were getting, he said I would have told them to cancel it, maybe that's true. He had all kinds of problems trying to set up a new phone and I'm wondering if this was somehow part of it, it was about that same time frame.
I don't know I'm just aggravated about a ton this evening. Also I blew up, all I hear is I want to hear this, he cuts you off on anything you try to talk about anymore. I am still mad, just fed up tonight. I hope like hell he isn't getting dementia like his mom. I think he would get very abusive, at least verbally. Just wow, those wonderful golden retirement years.
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vetswife
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Post by vetswife on Sept 25, 2018 15:11:58 GMT -5
DH continues to feel pretty well. His condition really hasn't changed so I'm thankful that he's staying stable.
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Happy prose
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Post by Happy prose on Sept 25, 2018 15:16:00 GMT -5
vetswife You're in my prayers. Hospice was a huge help when my dad was ill.
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vetswife
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Post by vetswife on Sept 25, 2018 15:25:35 GMT -5
Happy prose Thank you for the prayers! The hospice is a huge help-medicines delivered to the door, no long trips to the doctor's office. The staff have all been lovely too.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 25, 2018 17:08:13 GMT -5
countrygirl2, I know you liked to do everything yourself, but why not simplify Thanksgiving? Get your DH a deep fryer and let him fry the turkey. Then you just have to make sides, and with your canning, a lot of that is ready to go. Do a ham for Christmas. That takes almost zero prep, and again it will be just sides. Having said that, I am even more grateful that my DIL has taken over Thanksgiving. It makes her happy and only stresses me out. I really don't like to cook that much. Yes, we hear different things at the doctor, too. I hate that DH is going to the heart valve clinic for his six weeks follow-up without me tomorrow, but I really have to work sometime. If I have questions about what he tells me, I will call. They are very good about filling me in since they know he doesn't hear well.
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CCL
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Post by CCL on Sept 25, 2018 20:33:29 GMT -5
countrygirl2, I know you liked to do everything yourself, but why not simplify Thanksgiving? Get your DH a deep fryer and let him fry the turkey. Then you just have to make sides, and with your canning, a lot of that is ready to go. Do a ham for Christmas. That takes almost zero prep, and again it will be just sides. Having said that, I am even more grateful that my DIL has taken over Thanksgiving. It makes her happy and only stresses me out. I really don't like to cook that much. Yes, we hear different things at the doctor, too. I hate that DH is going to the heart valve clinic for his six weeks follow-up without me tomorrow, but I really have to work sometime. If I have questions about what he tells me, I will call. They are very good about filling me in since they know he doesn't hear well. Or don't they have grocery stores around there that you order Thanksgiving dinner from then they do the cooking for you? You pick It up and serve it. It doesn't have to be all that hard.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 25, 2018 20:46:28 GMT -5
countrygirl2 , I know you liked to do everything yourself, but why not simplify Thanksgiving? Get your DH a deep fryer and let him fry the turkey. Then you just have to make sides, and with your canning, a lot of that is ready to go. Do a ham for Christmas. That takes almost zero prep, and again it will be just sides. Having said that, I am even more grateful that my DIL has taken over Thanksgiving. It makes her happy and only stresses me out. I really don't like to cook that much. Yes, we hear different things at the doctor, too. I hate that DH is going to the heart valve clinic for his six weeks follow-up without me tomorrow, but I really have to work sometime. If I have questions about what he tells me, I will call. They are very good about filling me in since they know he doesn't hear well. Or don't they have grocery stores around there that you order Thanksgiving dinner from then they do the cooking for you? You pick It up and serve it. It doesn't have to be all that hard. Yes, that was my first thought . . . Along with the option of a restaurant that is serving it. But someone who DIYS all they do isn't going to shortcut Thanksgiving.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Sept 25, 2018 21:30:27 GMT -5
When hubs worked away DD and I would go out to eat on Thanksgiving, I did not cook, if he was not home. Sometimes she and I even went out for Christmas, or if we were home alone, I had a Cornish game hen, noodles, dressing, and a few things.
I have suggested buying it at the deli here, yep they do them, nope hubs won't do it. I would opt to go out for lunch, he says nope, no one should have to work on Thanksgiving, so he is not about to eat out. He does deep fry a turkey, I would like to bake it so we can have dressing, I think baking it in with a turkey makes the best tasting. But he wants the whole ten yards for dinner. MIL and her sister try to help, since they can't remember what they are doing they get in the way in the middle of what I'm trying to do and it drives me crazy. I do all the table setting before they come so that is done and try to get everything ready before they get here so they won't try to make noodles and stuff, lord help me. I do things like chop the salad the night before, bake a couple pies and make date pudding the day before and try to prep what I can before. Sometimes my feet are fine and its not an issue, sometimes they are not and its a terrible ordeal for me. I don't mind if it was just the 3 of us. Last year it was 9 or 10 people. Nobody really helps me when done. If MIL and her sister try, they stand around not knowing what to do with anything and asking, then I still have to do it so its easier for me to do it myself. They did not used to be that way. Otherwise I have to stop and help them do it. It's sad really, thank god its only 2 days a year. Hubs wants me to invite them over for dinner on Sundays more often, just please no.
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Sept 25, 2018 21:31:12 GMT -5
I would shortcut Thanksgiving in a heartbeat, no issue there.
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chapeau
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Post by chapeau on Sept 26, 2018 5:52:12 GMT -5
When hubs worked away DD and I would go out to eat on Thanksgiving, I did not cook, if he was not home. Sometimes she and I even went out for Christmas, or if we were home alone, I had a Cornish game hen, noodles, dressing, and a few things. I have suggested buying it at the deli here, yep they do them, nope hubs won't do it. I would opt to go out for lunch, he says nope, no one should have to work on Thanksgiving, so he is not about to eat out. He does deep fry a turkey, I would like to bake it so we can have dressing, I think baking it in with a turkey makes the best tasting. But he wants the whole ten yards for dinner. MIL and her sister try to help, since they can't remember what they are doing they get in the way in the middle of what I'm trying to do and it drives me crazy. I do all the table setting before they come so that is done and try to get everything ready before they get here so they won't try to make noodles and stuff, lord help me. I do things like chop the salad the night before, bake a couple pies and make date pudding the day before and try to prep what I can before. Sometimes my feet are fine and its not an issue, sometimes they are not and its a terrible ordeal for me. I don't mind if it was just the 3 of us. Last year it was 9 or 10 people. Nobody really helps me when done. If MIL and her sister try, they stand around not knowing what to do with anything and asking, then I still have to do it so its easier for me to do it myself. They did not used to be that way. Otherwise I have to stop and help them do it. It's sad really, thank god its only 2 days a year. Hubs wants me to invite them over for dinner on Sundays more often, just please no. Then he can do it. Or he can live with what you can do. My DH would like a lot of things, too. So would I. Neither one of us gets what we want all that much, really. Isn’t there a song about that?
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countrygirl2
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Post by countrygirl2 on Sept 26, 2018 10:59:36 GMT -5
Hubs actually said oh get mom and her sister to help you can. OH MY GOD! They never really canned anyway and I would never get done. Sometimes I wonder where his head is.
They would try, not saying they wouldn't, they both worked and worked hard at things, but they are not capable anymore. It is sad, but I'm not trying to deal with that.
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