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Post by Deleted on Oct 28, 2012 8:45:58 GMT -5
It sounds like she did "snap". It sounds like something that came about pretty suddenly and it is doubtful most people would have looked at her and said "she is going to stab and kill two little kids". Exactly!!! My wife cousin was admitted into a hospital early this year, no one in her family, not even her husband she shared a bed with knew she was sick. And everyone keep on going back on how the family treated the lady well or class separation; it probably had nothing to do with resentment or financial envy. The lady was sick and she snapped and no one saw it coming.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Oct 28, 2012 8:48:28 GMT -5
So, then you won't hire any Women at all to do anything? Sounds reasonable.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 28, 2012 8:53:53 GMT -5
Well, don't young women get PMS? You shouldn't hire them either. And, most child predators and sex offenders are men, so you can't hire them. Just leave the kids home with the dogs, i say! ;D
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raeoflyte
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Post by raeoflyte on Oct 28, 2012 9:04:05 GMT -5
Nope, too many stories of dogs trying to take care of babies like their own puppies and accidentally killing them.
I guess if everyone stopped having kids at least our problems would be short lived.
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midjd
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Post by midjd on Oct 28, 2012 10:06:09 GMT -5
That goes for SO many things we discuss on YM, not just childcare.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 28, 2012 16:57:48 GMT -5
I have too. It's just beyond horrific.
This is my younger niece's neighborhood. Her friend's best friend is the mom. The family didn't need their nanny for all of last summer, so my niece's friend took her for the month they didn't need her.
The friend is still hysterically sobbing, what, four or five days later, thinking that it could have been her kids instead, if the nanny had "snapped" a couple of months sooner. But not as much as the poor, poor parents, I'm sure.
I've been reading the articles, and many of the comments as well. Like Anne mentioned, far too often the comments turn into the classic "mommy war" about being a SAHM or working mom. In the Upper West Side, BOTH sorts of women often have nannies. Do I agree with it? Who cares? It's a fact.
And background checks? Agencies? Hah! Yes, some people go through them. But plenty of others don't. In reality, you like somebody's nanny, you find out how much they earn, and then you offer them more, and "steal" them. Obviously not everybody does this, but per my niece, it happens plenty in that milieu. My niece's last nanny was "pinched". Do I think this is right? Again, who cares?! But, it happens.
Or, if you have more integrity than that when you see a nanny you like and want for your own kids. You then (rightly or wrongly) assume you can trust the nanny you covet, or the friend that nanny works for. So, you ask one or the other, or both, "Do you know anybody who could work for me?"
This is a terrible, senseless tragedy. But personally, I don't think there were any huge warning signs. The nanny was in financially difficulty? Happily, people in financial difficulty generally do NOT slay their employers' small children, nor even their employers.
I honestly don't think anybody could have predicted this, and my heart just bleeds for the family.
Personally, I'm wondering if maybe the nanny's 17YO son was in some sort of big trouble and she "lost it" (This is TOTAL conjecture on my part, but if I were the cops, I'd be exploring that.)
ETA: The only thing I thought was somewhat telling was that the family offered her to another family who needed an occasional babysitter, and that family declined because they felt she was "too grumpy". Again, there is a HUGE leap between being "too grumpy" and murdering two small children.
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Sam_2.0
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Post by Sam_2.0 on Oct 29, 2012 15:42:08 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Oct 29, 2012 15:43:25 GMT -5
debt - this must really have shaken up your niece and her friends.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 29, 2012 15:49:02 GMT -5
Good points debt. There may have been no warning signs. I think we all look for back for something that can give us insight and a glimmer of hope that such a senseless tragedy can be prevented.
Another point though is the mental health system. How easy or difficult is it for someone having problems to just walk in and be admitted? Perhaps that is something that we should all start looking at as well.
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