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Post by omni on Jan 27, 2011 22:13:47 GMT -5
-- You know that can be taken two ways
Virginity? Oh, I know what you mean! << slaps forehead >> That is filthy! *swoon*
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 28, 2011 12:58:48 GMT -5
In a swimming pool. It was only stupid because we did not use protection because it was the spur of the moment... everything else was great.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 28, 2011 13:07:19 GMT -5
I loves me some omni.
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swamp
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Post by swamp on Jan 28, 2011 13:36:06 GMT -5
In a swimming pool. It was only stupid because we did not use protection because it was the spur of the moment... everything else was great. It may have been great for you. Water is NOT a lubricant, just sayin'.............
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Post by jennml on Jan 28, 2011 14:57:55 GMT -5
...because you believed him when he said, "just the tip."
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The J
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Post by The J on Jan 28, 2011 14:58:55 GMT -5
...because you believed him when he said, "just the tip." You believed him?
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Post by jennml on Jan 28, 2011 15:34:28 GMT -5
He had an honest face...and I was pretty horny smurfy LMAO
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 28, 2011 18:46:18 GMT -5
LOL ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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TD2K
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Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger
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Post by TD2K on Jan 28, 2011 20:30:11 GMT -5
Turning your back on Omni.
LOLOLOLOLOL I wonder if Loop would say the same thing about Dark.
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gambler
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"the education of a man is never completed until he dies" Robert E. Lee
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Post by gambler on Jan 28, 2011 21:01:10 GMT -5
we were both 15 and it was a cool sept morning me and rose had just said good morning to sister O'Neill our Sunday school teacher, as usual we headed up to the loft to goof off while the 7:15 service was going on. she was sitting on my lap and we were kissing with a lot of passion. as my hand slid slowly up the hem of her dress I was expecting the usual"stop" but this time all I got was a sigh. at this point I will stop as a gentleman speaks no more of these things
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Sammy
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Post by Sammy on Jan 28, 2011 21:25:20 GMT -5
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TD2K
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Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger
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Post by TD2K on Jan 28, 2011 21:30:08 GMT -5
Come on, spill the beans!!!
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Peace Of Mind
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Post by Peace Of Mind on Jan 29, 2011 0:20:29 GMT -5
I think he just did. With Rose a/k/a Rosy Palm.
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gambler
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"the education of a man is never completed until he dies" Robert E. Lee
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Post by gambler on Jan 29, 2011 13:01:33 GMT -5
It would have been less stress full if it had been my palm or ever hers. I do not ever remembering praying so hard for some one to bleed as i did for the next several days. The only thing that could have made it better thought is if she had a organism and hollered O GOD while communion was going on
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Post by omni on Jan 29, 2011 14:07:48 GMT -5
Okay, yeah, at one point in time, I dated a lot. I never expected, years later, to see a thread on a message board with all of my past ..... uh ..... acquaintances comparing notes. Sigh
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Befferz
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Post by Befferz on Jan 29, 2011 14:11:47 GMT -5
Oh come on, you know you love the stroll down memory lane!
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TD2K
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Post by TD2K on Jan 29, 2011 15:39:19 GMT -5
Omni hate the attention? LOL!! it's PoM's turn again
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Opti
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Post by Opti on Jan 29, 2011 16:35:34 GMT -5
"The only thing that could have made it better thought is if she had a organism and hollered O GOD while communion was going on "
Hmmmmmmmmmmm what kind of organism were you hoping for?
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Befferz
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Post by Befferz on Jan 29, 2011 16:40:42 GMT -5
"The only thing that could have made it better thought is if she had a organism and hollered O GOD while communion was going on " Hmmmmmmmmmmm what kind of organism were you hoping for? LOL, I thought about that too, but decided I wasn't brave enough to ask...
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The J
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Post by The J on Jan 29, 2011 16:41:54 GMT -5
"The only thing that could have made it better thought is if she had a organism and hollered O GOD while communion was going on " Hmmmmmmmmmmm what kind of organism were you hoping for? Not-quite-immaculate conception?
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gambler
Well-Known Member
"the education of a man is never completed until he dies" Robert E. Lee
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Post by gambler on Jan 30, 2011 9:34:44 GMT -5
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed.
She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee.
"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?"
The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" he asks solemnly.
The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies.
The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when you father caught us in the back seat of my car?"
"Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years". "I remember that too", she replies softly.
He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have gotten out today!"
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TD2K
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Post by TD2K on Jan 30, 2011 14:34:59 GMT -5
LOL Gambler, I love that joke.
I bet the next part was her hitting him over the head with a pot.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Jan 30, 2011 14:37:15 GMT -5
Cast iron skillets work so much better for that TD
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TD2K
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Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger
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Post by TD2K on Jan 30, 2011 14:38:50 GMT -5
True. We were watching "Two fat women" last night (a UK cooking show) and some of the cast iron skillets they were using showed signs of years of use. I'd have snagged them in a second if I had a choice.
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wvugurl26
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Post by wvugurl26 on Jan 30, 2011 14:53:24 GMT -5
I need to steal mine back from my brother. When I got my apt my dad found me some at auctions/garage sales and had my grandma season them. When I moved I let my brother borrow them bc most of my household stuff was going into indefinite storage. Now I want them back bc I lived with him for 3 months last year and he's not using them. They are packed up somewhere. And I finally have a gas stove again. Some things just work better in cast iron like fried chicken.
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TD2K
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Post by TD2K on Jan 30, 2011 15:20:26 GMT -5
I love my cast iron. I read a tip in Cook's illustrated if you want to season a cast iron pan like you've never seen, use flax seed oil. You have to strip off any previous seasoning layer, they suggested using oven cleaner.
Wipe it with the flax seed oil and then bake the pan in the oven.
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gambler
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"the education of a man is never completed until he dies" Robert E. Lee
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Post by gambler on Jan 30, 2011 15:29:01 GMT -5
There was a virgin that was going out on a date for the first time and she told her grandmother about it. Her grandmother says, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys. "He is going to try to kiss you; you are going to like that, but don't let him do that." She continued, "He is going to try to feel your breast; you are going to like that, but don't let him do that. He is going to try to put his hand between your legs; you are going to like that, but don't let him do that. Then the grandmother said, "But, most importantly, he is going to try to get on top of you and have his way with you. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family." With that bit of advice in mind, the granddaughter went on her date and could not wait to tell her grandmother about it. The next day she told her grandmother that her date went just as the old lady said. She said, "Grandmother, I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried, I turned him over, got on top of him and disgraced his family."
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TD2K
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Once you kill a cow, you gotta make a burger
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Post by TD2K on Jan 30, 2011 18:55:25 GMT -5
I want to be disgraced
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DebMD (banned)
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"Banned," they say. "Don't worry," they say. But beneath their words lurks a dark, terrible secret.
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Post by DebMD (banned) on Jan 31, 2011 4:47:32 GMT -5
Assumes ......... a position .........
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