Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 11:59:36 GMT -5
Posts: 30,626
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Sept 10, 2011 14:56:10 GMT -5
lol.
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bring in the new year
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Happy Thanksgiving!
Joined: May 3, 2011 17:28:52 GMT -5
Posts: 1,966
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Post by bring in the new year on Sept 10, 2011 15:27:31 GMT -5
I have bipolar disease and when I go manic ( like flying like a kiteHigh) I end up cleaning the house top to bottom and getting rid of all the stuff thats been crammed in closets and under the beds. It happens quite often so I have a clean house about 5 times a year (Really clean). Not that I want to wish a manic stage on anyone, but the next time you're in the mood, you can come visit me. ;D
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bring in the new year
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Happy Thanksgiving!
Joined: May 3, 2011 17:28:52 GMT -5
Posts: 1,966
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Post by bring in the new year on Sept 10, 2011 15:32:39 GMT -5
mizbear,
Remind yourself that DB is lucky. I would have already whacked him.
But as long as he wants to be helpful (and I'm guessing that being critical is his idea of being helpful) on your list, make a sub list of things he can do in your apartment. And the moment he opens his mouth, start assigning tasks.
"I can't believe you have all this crap in here."
Oh, that reminds me, I need you to take these three things to the /charity/home.
Beth, I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope the diet thing works out.
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mizbear
Senior Member
Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:12:46 GMT -5
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Post by mizbear on Sept 10, 2011 20:54:59 GMT -5
He decided he didn't want to be too helpful when I handed him 2 bags of shredding to take to the dumpster with him on his way out tonight! LOL but I love the idea bridget! Actually, if I still had a softball bat- he probably would have been whacked already. When we were in band together in high school, I could side arm a drumstick the length of our percussion section (I was section leader by default- none of the guys wanted it) to get the boys to be quiet. You could tell when one of them was really getting on my nerves- instead of hearing the drumstick smack the wooden cabinet on the other side of the band room- you would hear one of our drummers holler "OW- Whaddidya do that for!?" The bells player quit after half the year- she hated my guts
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Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 11:59:36 GMT -5
Posts: 30,626
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Sept 11, 2011 18:12:52 GMT -5
I'm feeling better lately bridget. I don't know why but I'm actually getting stuff done, in a half assed way but there's progress being made by me mentally and physically with clutter. Financially, it looks like I'm taking over the grocery shopping for me and the kids. Today I went though the coupon book and tossed out all the expired coupons. I've got a HUGE stack of coupon sections to go though and clip. I bet someone of them are already expired though...
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bring in the new year
Well-Known Member
Happy Thanksgiving!
Joined: May 3, 2011 17:28:52 GMT -5
Posts: 1,966
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Post by bring in the new year on Sept 11, 2011 20:07:04 GMT -5
Great news, Beth. Baby steps, baby steps. I know I can live with my clutter for a long time (good thing/bad thing about being single) and then suddenly when there are other stressors, IT HAS TO GO NOW. Okay, I may have a few mild manic episodes myself. But I always feel like attacking the papers and bills is a great stand in for the stuff I can't fix that easily. Good luck.
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mizbear
Senior Member
Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:12:46 GMT -5
Posts: 3,958
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Post by mizbear on Oct 6, 2011 8:31:50 GMT -5
hootieman- I had the same issue. I came from one of those family units that put the "fun" back in dysfunctional. My DB still either doesn't believe my father was that person or wants to avoid that subject- of course being a male child, was held in higher regard- so... my father's family held male children in higher regard- you could be dumb as a brick, but you counted more than 10 female children who were law-abiding genius level because you were male.
My father always had his fingers in the money and even controlled how the house was cleaned. I actually at one time was terrified of the sound of a vacuum cleaner. And yes- even though I do not smoke- I still check my soda cans for cigarette butts out of habit in my home 21 years later.
Things are getting better though- although I still need a bigger place.
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happyscooter
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Joined: Jan 5, 2011 9:04:06 GMT -5
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Post by happyscooter on Oct 9, 2011 8:49:25 GMT -5
reply #10, blackcat, i can sympathize with you. when my mom passed away, she had a lot of things to get rid of. unfortunately one sibling could not let go of anything. and i mean 'anything'. broken coffee mugs with no handles, flower pots, etc...
when my fil passes, we will not be involved as my dh is not the executor or an heir to the estate. we already know this so we are prepared when dh's sibling asks us to come help clean out 2400 square feet of cluttered and dirty house.
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mizbear
Senior Member
Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:12:46 GMT -5
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Post by mizbear on Oct 9, 2011 11:15:12 GMT -5
hallowscooter- That sucks. My DGM made sure after DGF died that all 4 of her children were listed as executors on her will. In the event that one of them passes/is unable/unwilling to execute the duty there is an alternate for each child- I am DM's alternate (I am the oldest and DB has alienated himself from most of the family), my uncle's oldest daughter is his alternate, my uncle #2's 2nd oldest daughter is his alternate because his first daughter has developmental issues, and my aunt's only child is her alternate (luckily he has his head screwed on straight). There are also provisions to handle things with less than 4 executors if need be. I have watched all of the feuding that has gone on since my DGF's death and during my DGMs illness and wouldn't wish it on anyone. I wouldn't be surprised if I don't pack up and leave town- at least temporarily- when all of this is over.
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mizbear
Senior Member
Stand back. I have a budget, and I know how to use it.
Joined: Jan 2, 2011 13:12:46 GMT -5
Posts: 3,958
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Post by mizbear on Nov 18, 2011 23:11:40 GMT -5
Rant- Feel free to skip:
Grandmother died Saturday. Friend's mom died today- found out on FB ANother friend died Tuesday- found out today. New boyfriend ended up in the hospital tonight because of a prank-
And my brother can't understand why I ate a 1/4 pound of fudge while talking to my mother
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bring in the new year
Well-Known Member
Happy Thanksgiving!
Joined: May 3, 2011 17:28:52 GMT -5
Posts: 1,966
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Post by bring in the new year on Nov 19, 2011 0:08:38 GMT -5
Oh, sweetie, I'm so so sorry.
Fudge is totally called for in this situation.
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Wisconsin Beth
Distinguished Associate
No, we don't walk away. But when we're holding on to something precious, we run.
Joined: Dec 20, 2010 11:59:36 GMT -5
Posts: 30,626
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Post by Wisconsin Beth on Nov 21, 2011 10:13:18 GMT -5
Hell yes it's called for. Brother is an idiot but we knew that already...
I started therapy on Sat.
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turbothumper
Junior Member
Joined: Dec 23, 2010 10:19:44 GMT -5
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Post by turbothumper on Nov 21, 2011 13:52:43 GMT -5
Miz and Beth: Hugs to both of you!! I just want both of you to know that I find you very inspirational and I have complete and total faith that you will both come through your trials and tribulations stronger women.
Comment on the original ?: I am 100% convinced that there is a direct corellation between the physcial, mental and financial. When one area starts falling apart, the other two follow. On the other hand, it works both ways. When I start turning one area around, the other two start falling in place too. I have been working on getting my finances in better shape for years, but sometimes I just run on auto pilot. Spend money where I don't need to, don't make any extra payments to debt, etc. I have wanted to take control of my weight problem for years, and I would go strong for a bit and then something would throw me off and I am back to where I started or worse. I decluttered most of my house last winter, but stopped short of finishing completely. I did counseling after DF died and it was a necessity. But, I could probably use more. I seem to be afraid of success. I get just a tad bit away from completely accomplishing something and then I sabotage myself. I have decided I am done with that. I want to look at my life and be happy with it and know that I am responsible for that happiness!!
Good luck to both of you! I look forward to being on life's journey with you!
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